If a female friend would be willing to help me out that would be wonderful. But I'd be upfront about it, I wouldnt just hang out with a girl, while subtely using it as an opportunity to mack on her friends. If there's a girl I want to hang out, so that I can meet her friends, I would tell her this upfront that this is why I'm hanging out with her.
Sometimes I hang out with girls just for the sake of having fun (not to meet other girls) but usually these are the girls that I'm not attracted to. But honestly this doesnt happen very often. If I were to do this more, it should be because I want to hang out with them more, not because i want to meet a chick. : /
are you trying to tell me that there would 'never' be a hot girl that would be willing to go on a date with me?
I highly doubt such a notion.
HomeBrewerDude
Lifer
- Jan 18, 2001
- 14,465
- 1
- 0
You are lucky I am posting skywalker66, but I doubt you will take my advice. Just by reading your posts in this thread, I can tell you that you are way too self-conscious. Think of something you are good at. Something that you are better than the average person at. Now you are confident about it right? You know what you can do, and you know what needs to be done to win at whatever it is, you don't question yourself. You aren't self-conscious about it.
That is the attitude of success, you need to take that attitude and apply it to the rest of your life. Work, school, girls. Whatever it is you are good at, you aren't coming to a message board to ask people what you should do next, or posting what your next move will or might be right? Right.
Tonight you took a step in the right direction so don't let the hecklers here demoralize you. You went out and did your thing, you learned from it. You have to keep on doing that. You are out there for yourself and learning for yourself. Your roomates kind of ditched you, but you didn't care, that was good. Your voyage, Skywalker, will be one that you travel alone many a day. You take your confidence in yourself and keep it with you at all times. Tou know little of what needs to be done in social situations now (judging by the hot girls' reactions, but then again you danced with some so you have something to work with, good), but you know that you need to learn and that's what counts. Keep going out and learning, that is the only way to do it.
You have to throw out thoughts that limit your success. For example hanging out with a girl so you can meet other girls. Think of guys who go out with friends and meet girls, they are mostly going out to meet girls, but is it wrong for them to go out with friends to do it? Then why is it wrong when those friends are female?
Another thing, which you will learn from observation if you go out enough, is that you can't be the guy going around saying "I Want a girlfriend.", "Do you have any girl friends to hook me up with?". Basically you can't go up to a girl and say hi, I want a girlfriend, do you want to be with me? What reason does she have to want to be with you? Every other guy on earth wants to be with her too. Girls don't work like this. Girls have to see some value you in you, in the way you interact with them, and in the way you interact with other people, to become interested.
Like people said, working out can only help you. Seeming interesting to girls is what you have to do ultimately.
Again I doubt what I say will have any impact so I'll stop now.
That is the attitude of success, you need to take that attitude and apply it to the rest of your life. Work, school, girls. Whatever it is you are good at, you aren't coming to a message board to ask people what you should do next, or posting what your next move will or might be right? Right.
Tonight you took a step in the right direction so don't let the hecklers here demoralize you. You went out and did your thing, you learned from it. You have to keep on doing that. You are out there for yourself and learning for yourself. Your roomates kind of ditched you, but you didn't care, that was good. Your voyage, Skywalker, will be one that you travel alone many a day. You take your confidence in yourself and keep it with you at all times. Tou know little of what needs to be done in social situations now (judging by the hot girls' reactions, but then again you danced with some so you have something to work with, good), but you know that you need to learn and that's what counts. Keep going out and learning, that is the only way to do it.
You have to throw out thoughts that limit your success. For example hanging out with a girl so you can meet other girls. Think of guys who go out with friends and meet girls, they are mostly going out to meet girls, but is it wrong for them to go out with friends to do it? Then why is it wrong when those friends are female?
Another thing, which you will learn from observation if you go out enough, is that you can't be the guy going around saying "I Want a girlfriend.", "Do you have any girl friends to hook me up with?". Basically you can't go up to a girl and say hi, I want a girlfriend, do you want to be with me? What reason does she have to want to be with you? Every other guy on earth wants to be with her too. Girls don't work like this. Girls have to see some value you in you, in the way you interact with them, and in the way you interact with other people, to become interested.
Like people said, working out can only help you. Seeming interesting to girls is what you have to do ultimately.
Again I doubt what I say will have any impact so I'll stop now.
MartyMcFly3
Lifer
Koing
Elite Member <br> Super Moderator<br> Health and F
- Oct 11, 2000
- 16,843
- 2
- 0
I am glad you are making and actually taking steps towards socialising a bit more.
DITCH your friends as they sound like no friends. BUT you will probably end up with a guy or girl that wants to hang with you and YOU DON'T want to hang with them...
Or next time just go out WITH THEM. Get to know one of them and be friends with that person.
Being friends with 'people' of any gender is a GOOD START. Don't be so picky about your friends. As long as they are 'good' people and 'loyal' that is a start. Things will get better when you have some friends to hang with. Things will happen and it will get the ball rolling.
Koing
DITCH your friends as they sound like no friends. BUT you will probably end up with a guy or girl that wants to hang with you and YOU DON'T want to hang with them...
Or next time just go out WITH THEM. Get to know one of them and be friends with that person.
Being friends with 'people' of any gender is a GOOD START. Don't be so picky about your friends. As long as they are 'good' people and 'loyal' that is a start. Things will get better when you have some friends to hang with. Things will happen and it will get the ball rolling.
Koing
apoppin
Lifer
Wow . . . just woke up . . .Originally posted by: apoppin
Sorry to hear . . .Originally posted by: skywalker66
Originally posted by: apoppin
jeeze, you're back already . . . what time is it?
it's 9:20 PM PST and i am getting ready to go out . . . in an hour or so. . . . and don't expect to be back till after 4:30AM.
:roll:
when the events on campus end for the evening, my social life is over.
unfortunately at my college they have visitation hours too, where u cant visit girls in their apartments after midnight. (u have to wait until noon the next day)
so yeah, and my roomates ran off without me. Right now I'm bored as fvck
since everyone else is bagging on you, i won't any further . . .
Sounds like you need to develop more loyal friends . . . or find a girl
ANyway, i'm OUTTA here . . .
parrrty!
aloha
I got home at 5 am
:roll:
unfortunately - although there were some great dancers last night (and the girls, although plentiful and cute, were a little too into each other :Q
. . . - too much salsa for me . . . cha cha somehow annoys me
. . . give me a good tribal beat anyday . . . . . . like tonight . . .
wrong sir, I read your entire post. the more times I hear what I ought to be hearing, the more it sticks in my head. Thank you for what you have written.
Being confident is tricky, but yeah it does help. I guess I just think its wrong to use any type of friend, either male or female, to meet some other females. I would rather just meet the females on my own. and hang out with friends for the sake of hanging out with them. If I am hanging out with my friends and I meet a female though, then that is fine.
That is my logic.
Thanks again for responding, and yes I did read all of it.
apoppin
Lifer
don't worry .. . take your time and do what is comfortable for you at your speed. However, don't just sit back and wait . . . it is in the nature of the male to be agressive in mating and women do like that - as long as you are not obnoxious.
And you are not "using" your friends to meet other friends. . . .
. . . it's good for them too cause you get the return the favour - later.
have fun!
Koing
Elite Member <br> Super Moderator<br> Health and F
- Oct 11, 2000
- 16,843
- 2
- 0
Just MAKE FRIENDS. DON'T USE your friends to hook up. If they introduce you to others then that is FINE. You are not using anyone. Better to have 'friends' to socialise with after you go to events like this then go back home alone.
Koing
Koing
apoppin
Lifer
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