The Navigator looks up from his console and says, "We're currently
orbiting the planet Schwartz in the Moonlight sector, captain."
just then, the communications snapped open
"<Fizz> Engineering to Captain Jerk! Engineering to Captain Jerk!"
The Captain jumped into his seat
<click> "Jerk here, what is it Snotty?"
"<Buzz> Sir, the pods are creating exess anti matter. I canndonnae
think they can take it! It could blow at any time!"
"Calm down, Snotty! Don't have a spaz!"
"<crackle> Ach, but the whole ship can blow itself to pieces, Jim!"
the captain was pissed. "I WANT ANSWERS, MISTER!!"
"<fizz> Well, I tried shoving a weiner in the warp drive, but it
didn't do a bit of good. By the by, would ya have a wee bit of
mustard up on the bridge?"
"Mr. Schlock?"
the science officer replied, "No mustard, captain."
"Analysis, Schlock?"
"It would seem that Mr. Snot is going to eat a weiner without
Mustard."
"As always, your logic is impecible, but I *was* referring to the
problem with the ships *warp drive*?"
"I would say that it is too early in the program to decipher
the problem."
"Recommendation?"
"Await further plot complication until taking any corrective measure."
Just then, the computer snapped up
"Warning, this is a plot complication
Warning, this is a plot complication!"
Schlock turned to his controls. "Plot complication coming into
sensor range now, captain. It seems to be a huge negative space
wedgie of immense power coming right at us at warp speed! Estimated
time of impact, 16.912314 seconds. 15....14...13.." he continued
counting.
The Captain turned to the pilot. "Commence avasive action, Mr. Lulu."
Lulu replied, "Yes, Captain Jerk!"
Schlock spoke up, "Evasive action inneffective. it's still closing in!"
The captain punched the commo button again, "Engineering!"
"<Crackle> Snot Here!"
"What's not there, Mr Snot?"
"<crackle> I said, 'Snot Here'!"
"Snotty, I need *FULL POWER*! I want to get out of here fast!"
"<crackle> Sorry, but the toilets have backed up into the engine
pods! I can flush it out, but I'll need time!"
"Time?! Mr. Schlock?"
Schlock continued counting..."2...1...wipe out."
The whole ship shook like mad.
Schlock commented, "fascinating! I haven't encountered this phenominon before!"