Every orgasm is different from orgasm to orgasm and from person to person. And from what I can tell, women don't orgasm the same way twice.
Couple of things to remember:
1) Like 85% of women cannot orgasm from vaginal penetration alone.
2) Know where her clitoris is and how she likes it stimulated (speed, location, movement). To this end, I would suggest observing her masturbate.
3) Nothing can substitute open communication. Men who don't ask and don't communicate are arrogant a-holes! Talk, laugh, cry. Making love is an adventure.
4) Yes, be aggressive when you know she wants it but also know when to be submissive and accept her direction and commands.
In my experience, I know women are satisfied by observing the following:
1) More vocal (moaning).
2) Vaginal contractions.
3) Clitoral area becomes way too sensitive for any kind of additional stimulation.
4) They say so. They wrap their arms around you and say thank you between ghasps.