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Question about calories/metabolism

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Hey all, so I'm a really tall guy (6' 5") but still have a tough time putting on muscle. Up until about two months ago, I was eating at least 3,000 calories per day, and lifted heavy. It got brutally hot outside, I wasn't making gains, and I quit lifting and gave up on my diet. I lost a lot of my strength between July and now.

I'm trying to get back at it again. I think part of the reason I was getting discouraged is because I wasn't making anymore gains on the bar. When calculating my calories, I calculated my TDEE at about 2250 (1.2 activity variable). 20% over 2250 comes out to 2,700, and so that is how I came out with 3000 calories for my "bulk".

However, when asking around at BB.com and some members here, it seems that a lot of tall guys eat at least 5,000 calories per day. One guy on BB.com, who is 6' 7", said he ate 6,000 per day. I understand the calculators are just supposed to be a starting point, but are they supposed to be off by a couple thousand cals? I'm trying to borrow a BodyBug or Body Media Fit from a friend so I can get a better idea what my TDEE is. Any other tips? I feel like if I "just eat more", I'll get fat. I'm already probably 20% BF. A while back, I felt like I was making such great progress. Now I sort of just don't know what to do anymore. I still look skinny fat, but am definitely stronger than when I started back in early 2011. I'm trying to go for a bodybuilder-esqe build.
 
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And yeah, you'll put on fat when bulking--can't really help it. If you're really around 20% and are worried about your %, cut while doing resistance training to get down to around 10-12% then bulk with surf's advice.
 
Two pounds of meat err day? I'm fucked!

It's not that hard. Wednesday I ate 1.5 lbs of chicken wings for lunch. Then at least a pound of pulled pork with my dinner. Had some steam broccoli with dinner to balance things out a bit. I consume olive oil and fish oil daily and try to eat eggs every other day to make sure I'm getting all the fats I need.

This is what I'm eating to lose weight. I'm down to 263 from 287 since July. My ultimate goal is to compete at 242lbs. in a powerlifting meet next July. To gain weight I add in rice or oats to my diet on my carb day.

Granted this is just what I choose to do. There are tons of eating plans out there on the web from guys that are competitive strength athletes.
 
what are your lifts at? Are you doing compound exercises? Do you drink milk (easy cals)?
I was progressing pretty well on the Stronglifts 5x5. I stopped at 225x5 squat, 125x5 bench, 85x5 OHP and a pathetic deadlift at about 165lbs. I was doing my DLs wrong for a few months and fixed my form and started over.

I do drink milk, but also am worried that I don't get a balanced diet day to day, so I try to avoid overdoing it on most foods.

I guess I'll "just have to eat more". I know it's the answer, I'm just having a tough time meeting that requirement.
 
I forgot to ask this...what are the consequences of not keeping a steady supply of calories? Does your metabolism ever "crash"? How does this impact cutting?

As I am trying to get back into lifting heavy and eating, there are days I definitely don't meet my calorie requirements, is that going to impact me severely?
 
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