Post your Pick-Up lines here...(lame or not)...

chin311

Diamond Member
Feb 27, 2003
4,306
3
81
I have a pretty lame one to start us off:

Did you clean those pants with Windex? I can practically see myself in them.

lol, my friend told me that one the other day, pretty sad indeed.

Yours?
 

Fausto

Elite Member
Nov 29, 2000
26,521
2
0
News Flash: All pickup lines are lame.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled neffing.
 

Lonyo

Lifer
Aug 10, 2002
21,938
6
81
Never used a pickup line :eek:
Managed to hook up with 5 people though.

Pickup lines are for those with no natural charm and wit, or those with no luck :p
 

brunswickite

Diamond Member
Jul 23, 2002
6,386
1
0
You make my software turn to hardware.
and
Want to come see my HARD DRIVE? I promise it isn't 3.5 inches and it ain't floppy.
 

chin311

Diamond Member
Feb 27, 2003
4,306
3
81
i know, ALL pickup lines are lame...but i find them pretty amusing.

Never used them myself either, i just tell them to friends (mostly girls) because tehy are funny.

 

billandopus

Platinum Member
Dec 29, 1999
2,082
0
0
A good friend of mine used to be a waitress at a very hopping bar. She used to get hit on allllll the time as you would expect in a place like that.

One of the lines she told me that made her roll her eyes and elicited her response "What?!"

is:

Is there a drink called name and phone number?

There's something so cheezy to pickup lines. What ever happened to "Hi, my name is ____. "
 

bleeb

Lifer
Feb 3, 2000
10,868
0
0
This one involves a wingman....

Basically have your wingman sit somewhere but within view of the target.

Then you go up to the target, and say, "Hi, see that guy over there?" <Point to your friend>

"That guy wanted to know if you thought that I was sexy?"

 

CPA

Elite Member
Nov 19, 2001
30,322
4
0
I told my 9 year old son to use this today at school (first day of school is today) to the first cute girl he walks by.

Him: Hey sweetthing, are you tired?
Her: No.
Him: Well you should be, because you've been running through my mind all day long.


I know, I'm a bad, bad father.
 

Josh

Lifer
Mar 20, 2000
10,917
0
0
Originally posted by: bill_n_opus
A good friend of mine used to be a waitress at a very hopping bar. She used to get hit on allllll the time as you would expect in a place like that.

One of the lines she told me that made her roll her eyes and elicited her response "What?!"

is:

Is there a drink called name and phone number?

There's something so cheezy to pickup lines. What ever happened to "Hi, my name is ____. "

That's what I use, "Hey, whats up..." then talk about whatever you can...
 

chin311

Diamond Member
Feb 27, 2003
4,306
3
81
o_0, i found another lamer:

"do you believe in love at first sight, or should i walk by again?"

 

Keego

Diamond Member
Aug 15, 2000
6,223
2
81
Originally posted by: CPA
I told my 9 year old son to use this today at school (first day of school is today) to the first cute girl he walks by.

Him: Hey sweetthing, are you tired?
Her: No.
Him: Well you should be, because you've been running through my mind all day long.


I know, I'm a bad, bad father.

lolll
 

DaveSimmons

Elite Member
Aug 12, 2001
40,730
670
126
Originally posted by: DaveSimmons
"So. Would you like a wormdo?"
or for the Red Dwarf impaired:

Dave Lister: You're a sad weasel of a man, you know that, Rimmer?

Arnold Rimmer: No, it's just that I'm ill at ease with the opposite sex.

Dave Lister: It's because you see them as some alien species that needs to be conquered with trickery. They're not - they're people. You don't need your book on hypnosis and, and, what's the other one? "1001 Fabulous Chat-up Lines"

Arnold Rimmer: Lister, I do need that. It's brilliant. Those chat-up lines are guaranteed.

Dave Lister: There's no such thing.

Arnold Rimmer: Alright. You be a woman. On your own in a bar, short leather miniskirt, peephole bra.

Dave Lister: OK. Go on.

Arnold Rimmer: Now this is the most incredible chat-up line you've ever heard in your life. Guaranteed.

Dave Lister: Go on.

Arnold Rimmer: OK, in a bar, on you own. [Pause as he works up nerve.] Excuse me, would you like to join me for a cocktail?

Dave Lister: No.

Arnold Rimmer: You can't say "no". It doesn't work when you say "no". You've got to say "yes".

Dave Lister: Oh, right, okay, go on, go on.

Arnold Rimmer: So. Would you like a wormdo?

Dave Lister: What's that, then?

Arnold Rimmer: What's what?

Dave Lister: A wormdo.

Arnold Rimmer: What about it?

Dave Lister: Is this still the opening line?

Arnold Rimmer: But you're not giving me the right replies!

Dave Lister: What is the right reply?

Arnold Rimmer: I come up to you and say "Excuse me, would you like to join me in a cocktail?", you say "Yes", I say "Would you like a wormdo?", you say "What's a wormdo", and I say...

Dave Lister: "Oh, it wriggles along the ground like that."

Arnold Rimmer: You know it!

Dave Lister: Rimmer, you could not pull a rotten tooth out of a dead horse's head with that one.
 

JoLLyRoGer

Diamond Member
Aug 24, 2000
4,153
4
81
So, how do you get into those pants?

If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me? (Joe Dirt rip off!)

Your name must be Daisy, because I have the incredible urge to plant you right here.

Just call me milk, I'll do your body good.

Can I buy you a drink, or do you just want the money?

I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your BedRock.

I may not be the best looking guy here, but I'm the only one talking to you.

I'd like to screw your brains out, but it appears that someone beat me to it.

I'm a bird watcher and I'm looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher, have you seen one?

Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that was a Braille name tag.

Excuse me, can I have your phone number? I seem to have lost mine.

I'm new in town, could I have directions to your house?

You look like a girl that has heard every line in the book, so what's one more going to hurt?

Screw me if I'm wrong, but is your name Yolanda?

Excuse me, do you wanna screw, or should I apologize?

Hi, I'm a necrophiliac. How good are you at playing dead?

I lost my bed, can I borrow yours?

Hi my name is _______. Remember it, cause you'll be screaming it all night long.

I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him? I think he went into this cheap motel room.

Was your dad a farmer? Cause you sure have great melons.

The fact that I'm missing my teeth just means that there's more room for your tongue.

I want to melt in your mouth, not in your hands.

Can I borrow a quarter? ["What for?"] I want to call my mom and tell her I just met the girl of my dreams.

OR:

I want to call your mother and thank her.

Is your daddy a thief? ["No."] Then how did he steal the sparkle of the stars and put it in your eyes?

You're so hot you melt the plastic in my underwear.

Would you be my love buffet? So I can lay you out on the table and take what I want?

Let's go to my place and do the things I'll tell everyone we did anyway.

The word of the day is "legs." Let's go back to my place and spread the word.

Do your legs hurt from running through my dreams all night?

That outfit would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor tomorrow morning.

My name's [your name]. That's so you know what to scream.

My name's [your name], but you can call me "lover."

Can I flirt with you?

Your daddy must have been a baker, 'cause you've got a nice set of buns.

All those curves, and me with no brakes.

Screw me if I'm wrong, but don't you want to kiss me?

I like every muscle in your body, especially mine.

[Grab his/her butt.] Pardon me, is this seat taken?

Is it hot in here or is it just you?

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put U and I together.

How about you sit on my lap and we'll talk anout the first think that comes up?

Do you know what'd look good on you? Me.

I miss my teddy bear. Would you sleep with me?

So...How am I doin'?

How about you and I go back to my place and get out of these wet clothes?

[Tap your thigh] You just think this is my leg.

Say, that's a nice [dress/outfit/article of clothing]. Can I talk you out of it?

I hope you know CPR, 'cause you take my breath away.

Excuse me, is that semen in your hair?

My face is leaving in fifteen minutes. Be on it.

All blatantly plagerized from
HERE! Google is your friend...
 

anxi80

Lifer
Jul 7, 2002
12,294
2
0
guy: wanna come over to my place for pizza and to screw?
girl: ewwwww, no!!
guy: what, you dont like pizza?

(or)

guy: hey, do you want to dance?
girl: uhhh, no.
guy: oh, im sorry, you misheard me, i said you look fat in those pants.
 

chin311

Diamond Member
Feb 27, 2003
4,306
3
81
Originally posted by: conjur
that's why there's a 'search' option!

:p

I was just joking around anyway...heh

ok, i get it :)...

so back to teh feature presentation...
 

jaeger66

Banned
Jan 1, 2001
3,852
0
0
If you meet my girlfriend try this:

"Hi, I have a penis!"

Then toss her some kneepads and relax.