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Post your favorite SIMPSONS quotes

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When the news paper reporter is reading homer's article he typed up on that old ass typewriter which had missing/broken keys, "momatos, meamalls?
 
Originally posted by: MoPHo
Bart: APRIL FO--*EXPLOSION*

when bart shakes homer's beer can for like 8 days straight and even puts it in a paint can shaker.
Click to expand...

Lou: Sounds like an explosion at the old Simpson house.
Wiggum: Eh, that's 6 blocks away, just call it in.
Lou: Looks like it's raining beer out of the chimney.
Wiggum: I am proceeding on foot, call in a 3-19.
Lou: Officer requesting pretzels. I repeat, pretzels.
 
Homer: You don't like your job, you don't strike. You go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.
(From the teacher strike episode)

EDIT: Changed the quote as I didn't remember it word for word until I just looked it up. 😱
 
Homer: I'm gonna eat mayonaise.

Time passes later on. . .

Homer to Lisa: I'm sorry honey, was that your mayonaise?

And then theres another Homerism. .

If God didn't want people to eat animals then why did he make them out of meat?
 
Mobster1: Hey! They's throwin' robots!
Linguo: They are throwing robots.
Mobster2: It's disrespecting us. Shut up a'you face!
Linguo: Shut up your face.
Mobster2: Whatsa matta you?
Mobster1: You ain't so big.
Mobster2: Me an him are gonna whack you in the labonza!
Lingo: Mmm. Aaa. Bad grammar overload! Err-ror! Err-ror! (Linguo explodes)
 
No time for that now, the computer's starting!

100 tacos for 100 dollars. This should suffice for the Dr. Who Marathon.

Moe: Well I'm better than dirt! Well, most kinds of dirt. Not that fancy store-bought dirt. That stuff's loaded with nutrients. I can't compete with that.
 
Back at Moe's Tavern, a man in a top hat with a mustache walks in. He looks and sounds like Homer, only he has a British accent.
Guy: Greetings, good men. Might I trouble you for a drink?
Moe: Oh, get out of here, Homer.
Guy: Homer? Who is Homer? My name is Guy Incognito. [he gets beaten up and tossed out, unconscious]

Funniest Shiet Ever. And then,

Homer: [walks up, looks at Guy] [gasps] Oh my God! This man is my exact double. [gasps] Oh my God! That dog has a puffy tail! [he chases it, giggling] Here, Puff! Here, Puff!


 
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