• We’re currently investigating an issue related to the forum theme and styling that is impacting page layout and visual formatting. The problem has been identified, and we are actively working on a resolution. There is no impact to user data or functionality, this is strictly a front-end display issue. We’ll post an update once the fix has been deployed. Thanks for your patience while we get this sorted.

POLL: What's the ideal # of sexual partners

Page 5 - Seeking answers? Join the AnandTech community: where nearly half-a-million members share solutions and discuss the latest tech.
Originally posted by: MrYAK
Originally posted by: Kenazo
My wife and I each had 0 before each other. That was good.
Click to expand...

same here
Click to expand...

Same, and as for sexual compatability? It is very rare that two people physically are unable to have sex.... and if both have 0 beforehand, then it is a unique experience that both partners can grow in, and are far more likely to end up sexually compatible since the only experience they have is with their spouse.

Plus I'm crazy jealous :/ 😛
 
Originally posted by: QuitBanningMe

Why should they tell you the truth?
Click to expand...


When you ask a person a question, they should tell you the truth. If they don't want to tell you, an honest person would simply say that they don't want to discuss that issue, which is still the truth.

But to make up a lie shows you what they're made of and what kind of person they are. If your gf lies to you, they have problems that extend far beyond their sexual history.

Dishonesty is a deal-breaker in any relationship.

 
Originally posted by: 91TTZ
Originally posted by: QuitBanningMe

Why should they tell you the truth?
Click to expand...


When you ask a person a question, they should tell you the truth. If they don't want to tell you, an honest person would simply say that they don't want to discuss that issue, which is still the truth.

But to make up a lie shows you what they're made of and what kind of person they are. If your gf lies to you, they have problems that extend far beyond their sexual history.

Dishonesty is a deal-breaker in any relationship.
Click to expand...

QFT, one of the better posts i've seen on this forum
 
Originally posted by: 91TTZ
Originally posted by: QuitBanningMe

Why should they tell you the truth?
Click to expand...


When you ask a person a question, they should tell you the truth. If they don't want to tell you, an honest person would simply say that they don't want to discuss that issue, which is still the truth.

But to make up a lie shows you what they're made of and what kind of person they are. If your gf lies to you, they have problems that extend far beyond their sexual history.

Dishonesty is a deal-breaker in any relationship.
Click to expand...
If they say they don't want to discuss it guys will let there mind dwell on it and keep asking the question.

If the number is higher than what they have as ideal in their head it will bother them and likely cause other problems.

Complete honesty isn't always good for a relationship.

Most girls have been through this so they lie.

Girls aren't the ones with a problem when it comes to this issue.
 
Originally posted by: 91TTZ
What would you guys do if you found out that your girl used to be ho that gang-banged the football team? Or if she used to be a crack whore?

I say the past matters.
Click to expand...

well then your 'love' wasnt very deep to begin with.
 
Originally posted by: 91TTZ
Originally posted by: QuitBanningMe

Why should they tell you the truth?
Click to expand...


When you ask a person a question, they should tell you the truth. If they don't want to tell you, an honest person would simply say that they don't want to discuss that issue, which is still the truth.

But to make up a lie shows you what they're made of and what kind of person they are. If your gf lies to you, they have problems that extend far beyond their sexual history.

Dishonesty is a deal-breaker in any relationship.
Click to expand...


Bull sh!t thats an unfair question to ask ever.. its none of your business... if she wants to share fine.. but this is not a question that is at all tasteful to even ask...
past is past... leave it there...

 
Originally posted by: gigapet
Originally posted by: 91TTZ
What would you guys do if you found out that your girl used to be ho that gang-banged the football team? Or if she used to be a crack whore?

I say the past matters.
Click to expand...

well then your 'love' wasnt very deep to begin with.
Click to expand...

so what.... id date a porn star.... BFD...
its just sex..
its not a huge deal..

 
Originally posted by: CVSiN
Originally posted by: 91TTZ

When you ask a person a question, they should tell you the truth. If they don't want to tell you, an honest person would simply say that they don't want to discuss that issue, which is still the truth.

But to make up a lie shows you what they're made of and what kind of person they are. If your gf lies to you, they have problems that extend far beyond their sexual history.

Dishonesty is a deal-breaker in any relationship.
Click to expand...


Bull sh!t thats an unfair question to ask ever.. its none of your business... if she wants to share fine.. but this is not a question that is at all tasteful to even ask...
past is past... leave it there...
Click to expand...

How is that BS? Did you even read my post?

I just got done saying that an honest woman who didn't want to discuss it should simply say that they don't want to discuss the issue. That way if they didn't want it to be your business it stays none of your business. And on top of that she didn't lie, which is always a quick way to destroy a relationship.
 
Originally posted by: 91TTZ
Originally posted by: CVSiN
Originally posted by: 91TTZ

When you ask a person a question, they should tell you the truth. If they don't want to tell you, an honest person would simply say that they don't want to discuss that issue, which is still the truth.

But to make up a lie shows you what they're made of and what kind of person they are. If your gf lies to you, they have problems that extend far beyond their sexual history.

Dishonesty is a deal-breaker in any relationship.
Click to expand...


Bull sh!t thats an unfair question to ask ever.. its none of your business... if she wants to share fine.. but this is not a question that is at all tasteful to even ask...
past is past... leave it there...
Click to expand...

How is that BS? Did you even read my post?

I just got done saying that an honest woman who didn't want to discuss it should simply say that they don't want to discuss the issue. That way if they didn't want it to be your business it stays none of your business. And on top of that she didn't lie, which is always a quick way to destroy a relationship.
Click to expand...
:roll: Yeah...that is going to work. The guy that wants to know isn't going to accept that.
 
Originally posted by: QuitBanningMe

:roll: Yeah...that is going to work. The guy that wants to know isn't going to accept that.
Click to expand...


Then that's his problem. The girl isn't obligated to stay with the guy. If the guy keeps asking and can't take a hint, then he gets dumped.

I don't see what the big deal is.

Lying to someone that you want to trust you is NEVER the best choice.
 
It's a shame, I've been in discussions like this with various people over the years and it's depressing to know that there are many people out there who see nothing wrong with lying, cheating, or even stealing.

Some people just don't have a good moral foundation.
 
I think some people on here don't realize that a relationship takes two people who both want to be in it. You can't force the other person to be involved and you can't fool the other person to be involved.

If one person sees something that they don't like in the relationship, they always have the right to walk away from it. Some of the fools on here make it sound like you have no right to ask certain questions. That's nonsense, and those who believe that have a weak mind for thinking that. Both people can ask each other anything they want. If they don't like the answer, or if they don't like being asked that question, they can deal with it. It's not like they're forced to stay together.

I've dumped girls that had character flaws that I didn't like. I've been dumped, too, because I guess she didn't like something about me. You're not going to make a relationship work by lying to each other- you might as well be honest, because the truth is always going to come out eventually. Honesty can sometimes get you in trouble in the short term, but dishonesty always gets you in trouble in the long run.
 
Originally posted by: 91TTZ
Originally posted by: QuitBanningMe

:roll: Yeah...that is going to work. The guy that wants to know isn't going to accept that.
Click to expand...


Then that's his problem. The girl isn't obligated to stay with the guy. If the guy keeps asking and can't take a hint, then he gets dumped.

I don't see what the big deal is.

Lying to someone that you want to trust you is NEVER the best choice.
Click to expand...

The dating pool would get really small for her. Most guys are like that.....the reason the pattern of lying started.

Also if you think your SO has never lied to you I can almost guarantee you are mistaken.
 
Originally posted by: 91TTZ
It's a shame, I've been in discussions like this with various people over the years and it's depressing to know that there are many people out there who see nothing wrong with lying, cheating, or even stealing.

Some people just don't have a good moral foundation.
Click to expand...

My moral foundation is fine.
 
Originally posted by: QuitBanningMe

The dating pool would get really small for her. Most guys are like that.....the reason the pattern of lying started.

Also if you think your SO has never lied to you I can almost guarantee you are mistaken.
Click to expand...

That would be the guys' decision if they want to date her or not. She can't change what other people think.

My girlfriend is not a liar. I do not hang out with that crowd. People who I know to be liars are absolutely worthless to me. I could watch them get eaten by fire ants and I wouldn't help them. I had a gf who lied a lot, and when I caught her in a lie I immediately dumped her. My current girlfriend is brutally honest, and I respect her for that. Sure, it leads to more problems in the short term when you hear something that you didn't want to, but in the long term it only builds trust and respect.

I'm a suspicious person, and I would definitely pick up on the inconsistencies if I was with someone who had a habit of telling lies. I've been with her for over seven years now, and that trust hasn't been broken.
 
Originally posted by: QuitBanningMe
Originally posted by: 91TTZ

Some people just don't have a good moral foundation.
Click to expand...

My moral foundation is fine.
Click to expand...


Obviously it is not, if you think lying to your significant other is acceptable behavior. It is never acceptable behavior.
 
Originally posted by: 91TTZ
Originally posted by: QuitBanningMe

The dating pool would get really small for her. Most guys are like that.....the reason the pattern of lying started.

Also if you think your SO has never lied to you I can almost guarantee you are mistaken.
Click to expand...

That would be the guys' decision if they want to date her or not. She can't change what other people think.

My girlfriend is not a liar. I do not hang out with that crowd. People who I know to be liars are absolutely worthless to me. I could watch them get eaten by fire ants and I wouldn't help them. I had a gf who lied a lot, and when I caught her in a lie I immediately dumped her. My current girlfriend is brutally honest, and I respect her for that. Sure, it leads to more problems in the short term when you hear something that you didn't want to, but in the long term it only builds trust and respect.

I'm a suspicious person, and I would definitely pick up on the inconsistencies if I was with someone who had a habit of telling lies. I've been with her for over seven years now, and that trust hasn't been broken.
Click to expand...

you cant say that with 100% certainty.. noone can...
there are people out there that can beat polygraphs....

people lie... all people do it weather its a white lie or a whopper...
all people do it...

deal with it.

 
Originally posted by: CVSiN

you cant say that with 100% certainty.. noone can...
there are people out there that can beat polygraphs....

people lie... all people do it weather its a white lie or a whopper...
all people do it...

deal with it.
Click to expand...

Of course nobody can ever be 100% sure. But after you know someone long enough, you get to know their quirks, and what they do and don't do.

My last girlfriend lied a lot. She was one of those people who didn't consider facts to be concrete. If you asked her where she went out to eat today, she might say "McDonalds". If you asked her later on, she might say, "Burger King". Yet again, the answer might be Wendy's.

The same applied to who she hung out with. She wouldn't tell the truth about that, either.

Since I was not obligated to date her, I dumped her. I cannot trust liars. If my current gf asks me who I hung out with, she's getting the truth. I don't lie about it, because that's immature and dishonest.

I expect the truth from her, as I would from anyone. Lying is not acceptable behavior, and I'd distance myself from anyone who behaved that way. I've stayed with my current gf for 7 years, so obviously she's not a fibber. If she was, she'd get the boot immediately.

PS- it doesn't surprise me at all that many of the people here aren't mature enough to hold a steady relationship. Just look at the average age on here and all the YAGT's. Even many older adults never fully mature to the point of being honest. Lots of people are scum.
 
Originally posted by: 91TTZ
Originally posted by: CVSiN

you cant say that with 100% certainty.. noone can...
there are people out there that can beat polygraphs....

people lie... all people do it weather its a white lie or a whopper...
all people do it...

deal with it.
Click to expand...

Of course nobody can ever be 100% sure. But after you know someone long enough, you get to know their quirks, and what they do and don't do.

My last girlfriend lied a lot. She was one of those people who didn't consider facts to be concrete. If you asked her where she went out to eat today, she might say "McDonalds". If you asked her later on, she might say, "Burger King". Yet again, the answer might be Wendy's.

The same applied to who she hung out with. She wouldn't tell the truth about that, either.

Since I was not obligated to date her, I dumped her. I cannot trust liars. If my current gf asks me who I hung out with, she's getting the truth. I don't lie about it, because that's immature and dishonest.

I expect the truth from her, as I would from anyone. Lying is not acceptable behavior, and I'd distance myself from anyone who behaved that way. I've stayed with my current gf for 7 years, so obviously she's not a fibber. If she was, she'd get the boot immediately.

[b}PS- it doesn't surprise me at all that many of the people here aren't mature enough to hold a steady relationship. Just look at the average age on here and all the YAGT's. Even many older adults never fully mature to the point of being honest. Lots of people are scum.[/b]
Click to expand...

:roll:. I've been with my wife for ten years. I'm above the average age.

I think your little lie detector might need some adjusting. As for the topic I understand why the lie is told and that things are much more complex than you seem to think they are.

I guess it is good that you miss the complexity though.......makes it a little easier to sit on your moral high ground. :roll:
 
Originally posted by: QuitBanningMe

:roll:. I've been with my wife for ten years. I'm above the average age.

I think your little lie detector might need some adjusting. As for the topic I understand why the lie is told and that things are much more complex than you seem to think they are.

I guess it is good that you miss the complexity though.......makes it a little easier to sit on your moral high ground. :roll:
Click to expand...

Translation: My wife lies to me and I take it, because I'm whipped.

So what do you do when your wife lies to your face? Probably nothing. You're the guy who thinks it's more "complex" to lie than to tell the truth. I can understand why people who lack intelligence would think this way. They're all about the short-term. It gets the problem out of the way, for a minute. But that's long enough, since they're too myopic to consider the longer-term implications of being a lying rat.

In the long term, instant gratification is rarely the best way. If you haven't learned by now, you probably never will. You've probably plateaued.
 
Originally posted by: CVSiN
you cant say that with 100% certainty.. noone can...
there are people out there that can beat polygraphs....

people lie... all people do it weather its a white lie or a whopper...
all people do it...

deal with it.
Click to expand...

Sure everyone does it, but that doesn't make it acceptable. I used to have a girlfriend that would occasionally lie to "make things easier for me". All it ever did was ensure a huge fight when the truth inevitably came out.

I'm from the school of thought that a relationship is nothing without openness and honesty. Any woman I'm in a relationship with should trust me enough to not judge her on her past. I can get past her indiscretions, but I will not stay in a serious relationship if she is going to withhold information from me.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

TRENDING THREADS

Back
Top