POLL: Popping the question... public or private ?

rh71

No Lifer
Aug 28, 2001
52,844
1,049
126
I chose to do it in private, but a lot of people feel it's okay to do it in a public setting when there could be a lot of onlookers. Before I went and did it (a year ago), I asked coworkers what it "should" be... and the women there said it should be a private moment. With that, I made my decision.

What do YOU think the special moment should be like ?
 

deftron

Lifer
Nov 17, 2000
10,868
1
0
People only do it in public because it puts pressure on the other person to say Yes.


 

poopaskoopa

Diamond Member
Sep 12, 2000
4,836
1
81
Public place. My buddy did it in a park where he and his now-wife went on the first date. I was asked to hide in the bush and take pictures when he popped the question(I did come out of the bush once I started taking pictures). That worked out quite well.
 

rh71

No Lifer
Aug 28, 2001
52,844
1,049
126
Originally posted by: nick1985
make a "show me the results" option
Can't you just make a choice for yourself first ? You have to be thinking something to begin with... am I wrong ?
 

toant103

Lifer
Jul 21, 2001
10,514
1
0
Originally posted by: poopaskoopa
Public place. My buddy did it in a park where he and his now-wife went on the first date. I was asked to hide in the bush and take pictures when he popped the question(I did come out of the bush once I started taking pictures). That worked out quite well.

"I was asked to hide in the bush "

thank you for that. Just made my day
 

illusion88

Lifer
Oct 2, 2001
13,164
3
81
Public is good. I really think it depends on the girl. Some girls I know just dont want anything to do with something so personal and large crowds.
 

Rastus

Diamond Member
Oct 10, 1999
4,704
3
0
I don't think there is an answer that fits all people, relationships, or situations.

For instance, if both of you are very outgoing people and have a lot of common friends and your relationship is considered special by those friends, then bring those friends together at a dinner or party and make an event out of it.

If you as a couple like to get away from the crowd and your relationship is one that is private, like weekend getaways in the mountains or up the coast, then an intimate setting in your favorite place, just the two of you is in order.

Just a couple examples.
 

Vic

Elite Member
Jun 12, 2001
50,422
14,337
136
Originally posted by: deftron
People only do it in public because it puts pressure on the other person to say Yes.
Bingo. And (IMO) pressuring the other person into saying yes is not a good foundation for a new marriage.
 

AreaCode707

Lifer
Sep 21, 2001
18,447
133
106
Eh, about pressure - most people already pretty much know the answer to the question before they ask it, so pressure usually isn't an issue. I think it mainly has to do with individual personality type. A lot of girls love the attention they'd get from a public proposal, and that would make it ultra memorable for them. Girls love to talk and show how much their guy loves them, so many gals would adore being asked in public. Others, to have it be a private experience is what makes it inestimably precious to them. Can't generalize one way or the other- just know your would-be fiancee and what her tastes are. Heck, even ask her about her fantasy proposal - I guarentee, most girls probably have one.
 

zbalat

Platinum Member
Oct 9, 1999
2,501
1
81
Originally posted by: Vic
Originally posted by: deftron
People only do it in public because it puts pressure on the other person to say Yes.
Bingo. And (IMO) pressuring the other person into saying yes is not a good foundation for a new marriage.

If you are not 100% certain that she will say yes then you shouldn't be asking her regardless of where you pop the question.

 

MartyMcFly3

Lifer
Jan 18, 2003
11,436
29
91
www.youtube.com
I think outdoors is good as long as no one/not many people are around. Just adds for a more romantic setting.... You dont want some goober there spoiling the moment by making some dumba$$ remark.
 

rh71

No Lifer
Aug 28, 2001
52,844
1,049
126
I tried to get to the very front of the cruise ship to do it, but there was already a couple there... romantically embracing... staring into the Caribbean... :|

I settled for right next to it... at least still with nobody able to see... and I dropped to a knee and did it seemingly so quick. ;) I felt like such a dork doing the "speech" ... there would be no way I'd do that in public.
 

sohdahere

Senior member
Dec 30, 2002
626
0
0
Originally posted by: deftron
People only do it in public because it puts pressure on the other person to say Yes.

If thats what its gonna take to get her to say yes, maybe you shouldn't be asking in the first place...
;)
 

nativesunshine

Diamond Member
Jan 6, 2003
3,284
0
0
I think either....as long as there are no interruptions..nothing ruins a mood faster or more effectively.