Pet owners who consider themselves 'mummy' and/or 'daddy' to their pets - Weird?

[Apple Of Sodom]

I've linked to one article, doesn't mean that there aren't more

"replacement child syndrome"
About 11,500 results (0.30 seconds)

I don't really care enough to research the point any further.

Incest returned 69.1 million results. What is your point? It is a syndrome because it isn't normal.

You are asserting that it is normal for people to replace their children. Do you really believe that to be NORMAL behavior?

 

[Ns1]

You are asserting that it is normal for people to replace their children. Do you really believe that to be NORMAL behavior?

Honestly, if I met a parent whose child died (esp. at a young age) yes I would expect them to try again and have another kid, and I would consider that "normal" behavior

 

[Apple Of Sodom]

Good conversation, everyone. I am out of here for the 5 day weekend. OILFIELDTRASH, I really appreciate all of your insight. Where did you get your couch from so I can try and snag one on Black Friday? Do you think they will have a 2-for-1 special?

Everyone else have a great Thanksgiving with your families.

 

[Apple Of Sodom]

Honestly, if I met a parent whose child died (esp. at a young age) yes I would expect them to try again and have another kid, and I would consider that "normal" behavior

Having another kid is normal behavior. Saying "The kid died so let's have another one to replace him" is not. I see it with pets all the time. "My dog died. We are going to the pound tomorrow to get another one."

 

[WilliamM2]

I can't imagine a lot of situations where I have to choose a random stranger's life over my pet's life. One would be a fire. I guess I'd probably choose the stranger if for some reason I had to assist them. On the other hand I would have minimal qualms about killing someone who was going to kill my pet if I didn't.

The only way my pets would be in danger of a fire is in my own home. If there was a random stranger in my home, I would wonder what he was doing there, certainly up to no good. I'd save my pets.

 

[Ns1]

Having another kid is normal behavior. Saying "The kid died so let's have another one to replace him" is not. I see it with pets all the time. "My dog died. We are going to the pound tomorrow to get another one."

Fair enough.


So can we agree on the following?

When a parent get a child as a replacement (as in the case of "replacement child syndrome") it is abnormal behavior. But it DOES happen.


hopefully you and I can both leave this thread now and be happy. LOL

 

[WilliamM2]

There is just no fucking comparison between a dog and a child.

Of course not, but cats on the other hand...

 

[mikeymikec]

I CAN'T TAKE ALL THIS FIGHTING!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E6cPSKLRR2A

 

[angminas]

Animals are not people. Treating them like people is wrong. I've was called the brother of a dog and treated that way for years, and let me tell you...that's not a good feeling.

 

[darkewaffle]

Having another kid is normal behavior. Saying "The kid died so let's have another one to replace him" is not. I see it with pets all the time. "My dog died. We are going to the pound tomorrow to get another one."

Well, yea. Most people view animals as disposable. I think it's unfortunate they're that out of touch with creatures that have so much life in them but you can't fix that for them. People either "get it" or they don't. My brother is that way, he's just never connected to them but I don't begrudge him it.

I've had two dogs and five cats in my entire life, never have I 'replaced' one. Whenever one passes I don't just go pick up another. In some small way when another pet comes into my life they help fill a void (in much the same way that having another child would fill the void of a lost first one), but each one is different. Our first cat was a matriarch, unshakable but kind of distant. The second was a wild boy, always hunting and fighting. The third we hardly knew, he passed just a few days after we found him on the road outside our house one rainy night. The fourth is a scaredy cat and a little crazy, she hisses at her own tail and hardly leaves her 'comfort zone' rooms. The fifth is another wild boy, but listens well considering he was a stray in town for the first year of his life.

I get that you don't "see" that in your pet(s), they're 'objects' distinguishable only by the color of their fur for your families amusement or however you want to term it. That's fine, but you calling them all the same and replaceable is kind of like me saying all babies are the same because all they do is cry and poop and have no personality and all look about the same. Which I don't actually think is true, I just haven't had the experience yet. I wouldn't belittle a person for seeing that in their kid though.

People that are involved with raising their pets have just as much of a 'real' experience as someone who is raising their kids have, just different challenges and needs. Raising kids is the triathlon, raising a pet is the 5k.

 

[Ns1]

I get that you don't "see" that in your pet(s), they're 'objects' distinguishable only by the color of their fur for your families amusement or however you want to term it. That's fine, but you calling them all the same and replaceable is kind of like me saying all babies are the same because all they do is cry and poop and have no personality and all look about the same. Which I don't actually think is true, I just haven't had the experience yet. I wouldn't belittle a person for seeing that in their kid though.

That's exactly what's happening here.

 

[JulesMaximus]

Of course not, but cats on the other hand...

LOL! 😛

I wub my kitties. :wub: I don't consider myself their "daddy" though. Never have, never will.

 

[IronWing]

LOL! 😛

I wub my kitties. :wub: I don't consider myself their "daddy" though. Never have, never will.

The DNA test says otherwise.

 

[SlitheryDee]

I'm not my pet's daddy. Our relationship is more the Master/Slave variety.

 

[IronWing]

I'm not my pet's daddy. Our relationship is more the Master/Slave variety.

Cats are great.

 

[JulesMaximus]

Well, yea. Most people view animals as disposable. I think it's unfortunate they're that out of touch with creatures that have so much life in them but you can't fix that for them. People either "get it" or they don't. My brother is that way, he's just never connected to them but I don't begrudge him it.

I've had two dogs and five cats in my entire life, never have I 'replaced' one. Whenever one passes I don't just go pick up another. In some small way when another pet comes into my life they help fill a void (in much the same way that having another child would fill the void of a lost first one), but each one is different. Our first cat was a matriarch, unshakable but kind of distant. The second was a wild boy, always hunting and fighting. The third we hardly knew, he passed just a few days after we found him on the road outside our house one rainy night. The fourth is a scaredy cat and a little crazy, she hisses at her own tail and hardly leaves her 'comfort zone' rooms. The fifth is another wild boy, but listens well considering he was a stray in town for the first year of his life.

I get that you don't "see" that in your pet(s), they're 'objects' distinguishable only by the color of their fur for your families amusement or however you want to term it. That's fine, but you calling them all the same and replaceable is kind of like me saying all babies are the same because all they do is cry and poop and have no personality and all look about the same. Which I don't actually think is true, I just haven't had the experience yet. I wouldn't belittle a person for seeing that in their kid though.

People that are involved with raising their pets have just as much of a 'real' experience as someone who is raising their kids have, just different challenges and needs. Raising kids is the triathlon, raising a pet is the 5k.

It always amazes me when I see people compare having a pet to raising a child. It is ALWAYS spoken by someone without children (and as such they are completely clueless about it).

Please don't compare your dog or cat to my son. It isn't even close to the same. You'll understand someday when you have children of your own.

Losing a pet is like losing a pinky finger, you will have a scar but you'll adjust and continue to live your life pretty much as it was before. Losing a child is like someone hacked all your limbs off, fucked your wife and then killed her, ass raped you repeatedly and then got you fired you from your job, took your house, and then killed your entire family. And if you think I'm kidding just ask someone who has lost a child.

Actually, it is probably worse than what I described above. It is a horror I cannot even imagine.

Here is an excerpt from an e-mail my friend sent to me, and a few of his closest friends, a few days after learning of the death of his son.

-Thank you all for your calls and messages of support. I can’t begin to describe the horror of losing [name removed]. He was our world and future, and without him, we have lost all sense of purpose. We find it difficult to get from one moment to the next. We cry until we can’t cry any more, then we’re angry, then in denial and then there’s a moment of calm before back to sobbing.

We sought grief counseling this morning, and while it didn’t do a whole lot to improve the situation, it sounds like what we’re going through is typical. We hope, in time, after much grieving and depression, we will discover a new purpose. But at this point, we can’t imagine what could fill a fraction of the void that’s been created. My hopes and dreams are gone forever.

Please keep us in your prayers and thoughts. We will be relying on our friends and family more than ever."

-The loss of [name removed] continues to be unbearable. But I wanted to thank you for your love and support in this most difficult of time. The ONLY thing that would make this worse is to have to go through it alone.

Last night the neighbors in [town removed] held a candle light vigil for [name removed] out in front of his moms house. There were hundreds and hundreds of people who showed up. It was nice to see such love and support (and I'm sure [name removed] liked it too). I spent some time with his friends to help them grieve and tell them all how much they meant to him. This is their first great loss and are having as hard a time as his family.

My wife and I had to put our dog of 12 years down almost 2 years ago. It was hard and we both cried but it was also a relief because she was in bad shape. It took us a few days to come to terms with it.

It will take my friend years to come to terms with his loss. Every Birthday missed, every holiday without him will be a reminder of what could have been. He and his wife took a month off from work to grieve.

You guys simply have no idea... :'(

 

[pauldun170]

House is on fire.
I'll risk my life for the kids.
Pets? guess I won't have to take em to he vet get cremated.

As far as I'm concerned all pets are 1 really bad situation from being livestock\warm cozy hat.

If other want to play dolls with their pets and treat them like people that's fine.

 

[Ns1]

It always amazes me when I see people compare having a pet to raising a child. It is ALWAYS spoken by someone without children (and as such they are completely clueless about it).

Please don't compare your dog or cat to my son. It isn't even close to the same. You'll understand someday when you have children of your own.

Until that point, the value of my pets (aka my kids) > the value of a child that I do not know

If my dog were to die RIGHT NOW, I would be fucking sad as shit my GF would be sad as shit and we would be sad as shit for who knows how long

If a child that I don't know were to die right now...BFD, no sweat off my back.

selfish and narcissistic thoughts I am aware.

(these comments not directly specifically at you JM)

 

[Jaskalas]

The hell?

Pets are family.

 

[SlitheryDee]

Cats are great.

She's tough, but I think I'm meeting her requirements. Maybe she'll let me back into the kitchen before too long.

 

[lxskllr]

Cats are great.

The kitten has a luxurious, Bohemian, unpuritanical nature. It eats six meals a day, plays furiously with a toy mouse and a piece of rope, and suddenly falls into a deep sleep whenever the fit takes it. It never feels the necessity to do anything to justify its existence; it does not want to be a Good Citizen; it has never heard of Service. It knows that it is beautiful and delightful, and it considers that a sufficient contribution to the general good. And in return for its beauty and charm it expects fish, meat, and vegetables, a comfortable bed, a chair by the grate fire, and endless petting.

...

 

[JulesMaximus]

Until that point, the value of my pets (aka my kids) > the value of a child that I do not know

If my dog were to die RIGHT NOW, I would be fucking sad as shit my GF would be sad as shit and we would be sad as shit for who knows how long

If a child that I don't know were to die right now...BFD, no sweat off my back.

selfish and narcissistic thoughts I am aware.

(these comments not directly specifically at you JM)

And until you have children of your own you will continue to be clueless. Just accept that you are clueless and move on. Really, it is the only thing you can do to save face.

I seriously hope you never have to go through what my friend is going through, and what I quoted above were two e-mails verbatim from him within the first week of learning of the death of his only child. This is a guy I've known for more than 20 years. I knew his son when he was just a newborn, watched him grow up, watched him interact with my own son who is a few years younger. His son was only 14 years old, he was a good kid, the best. I can't imagine I'd ever chose the life of a pet, even my own, over the life of a child... any child.

I've had pets die... many of them. The grief you will feel for them is nothing compared to the grief of losing a child. I can imagine what losing a child feels like because I have a child of my own and I've seen first hand the devastation of what that is like but ultimately it is still foreign to me thank fucking god. But you WILL lose your pet in your lifetime, that is almost a 100% given. You know that going in. That is something no parent really prepares themselves for though... nor should they have to.

By the way, I love threads like this. Great debating you all. :thumbsup:

 

[JulesMaximus]

The hell?

Pets are family.

I've had many pets over the years and I am very fond of them. We have two cats who I adore but they have a lifespan of what... 15 years if they're lucky?

I would love to try to explain to you why my child is so much more important to me but if you have to ask that question you are obviously so completely clueless that it would be like me trying to teach advanced mathematics to a chimpanzee.

 

[Auric]

How about if it was between saving your dog and saving an Italian Leather Sofa? 😎

How about if it was down to saving dogs from being made into an Italian Leather Sofa (hint: by not buying the sofa)?

I've had dogs and I have a kid. No dog is worth the life of a child IMO.

How about if betwixt a kid who is a puppy strangling sociopath and a dog who rescues children?

 

[CZroe]

I'm not a pet owner at the moment (or, my former pets haven't lived with me for many years).

My sister is "mommy" to her dog. I'm frequently referred to as "uncle" in relation to the dog.

It doesn't really seem weird for someone to love their dog like a child...if they don't have children.

You forgot to mention that they both live with you.