People In My Grad Program are F'ing Loons, Pt II

[Whisper]

if you are at college why did you have to organize a get-together or pub crawl. The idea is to not hang out with class members but get a feel of what else is out there.

Show up to a hot spot and mingle not invite BIO4011 to drinks after lab.

It's actually very common for grad programs (at least based on my personal experience with clinical psych programs at various universities) to organize/plan these kinds of things. You spend so much time seeing the same people that you really don't have much opportunity to socialize outside your area. I've been fortunate in that I have a good number of non-psych friends, although they're grad students in their own rights (math and engineering mostly).

Also, you typically avoid hanging out with undergrads, as at some point you're likely going to be their instructor; it's more difficult to maintain appropriate professional boundaries if your students have seen you quasi-intoxicated while out at a bar. When spending time with fellow grad students, you don't have to worry about those sorts of things. You also happen to generally have quite a bit in common.

Although to the OP, sadly, you'll just have to get used to the gossiping. Whether it's about your, their classes, their "super-insane work load" (or lack thereof), or their major professor, people in grad programs just seem to like to talk. Your best bet is to simply remain friendly, ignore the rumors, and go about your business.

 

[darkswordsman17]

It's okay, MrMatt. Some people are just being mean to you.

You might have phrased it a bit weird, but a normal human wouldn't of blown you off like that in the midst of a favor.

Looking a gift horse in the mouth, I believe is the phrase.

I don't know, most people wouldn't have blown off someone they offered to help, and that would definitely need the help, over something so trivial either. Considering he said he knew her (was "somewhat friendly"), that he would just drop her like that speaks volumes about him as well. Plus, he wasn't exactly nice in his response when he called her a bitch.

 

[AMCRambler]

I think she said it was retarded because you offered to fix it and then said you couldn't do it until Sunday. If it's finals, she needs the friggin' thing now. Duh.

 

[MrMatt]

It's actually very common for grad programs (at least based on my personal experience with clinical psych programs at various universities) to organize/plan these kinds of things. You spend so much time seeing the same people that you really don't have much opportunity to socialize outside your area. I've been fortunate in that I have a good number of non-psych friends, although they're grad students in their own rights (math and engineering mostly).

Also, you typically avoid hanging out with undergrads, as at some point you're likely going to be their instructor; it's more difficult to maintain appropriate professional boundaries if your students have seen you quasi-intoxicated while out at a bar. When spending time with fellow grad students, you don't have to worry about those sorts of things. You also happen to generally have quite a bit in common.

Although to the OP, sadly, you'll just have to get used to the gossiping. Whether it's about your, their classes, their "super-insane work load" (or lack thereof), or their major professor, people in grad programs just seem to like to talk. Your best bet is to simply remain friendly, ignore the rumors, and go about your business.

I agree, I'm just minding my own business from here on out.

I also agree with Alk. in a way. I was more inviting people to these things because at the grad level there aren't really 'hot spots' given that 90% of the people are from out of state, and most brought significant others with them so they're not out partying every day at clubs.

I think she said it was retarded because you offered to fix it and then said you couldn't do it until Sunday. If it's finals, she needs the friggin' thing now. Duh.

I would understand that, I really would, I didn't say "Hey I'll get right on that....on sunday" I said that maybe I could help her with it. I offered her an alternative to best buy or whatever. She chose to act like a bitch.

 

[alkemyst]

Unless one is attending a community college, chances are any university is going to be made up of mostly those not from the area. Most in college also usually have significant others at some point. Sounds like more an anti-social/old person thinking than anything else amongst those people.

 

[The-Noid]

Your fault, don't volunteer unless you are actually going to come through. She shouldn't care about your eating habits and your ability to go work. If you volunteer you could fix instead of doing those things or wake up earlier.

 

[Babbles]

This was even true even almost 20 years ago when I graduated with BS in chem. Lab work was about all I was fit for at big pharma in socal paying almost home depot wages. I stayed in school MS in engineering for obvious reasons. Hard sciences are really a waste unless your path is medicine or all the way through for PhD. But even the later route we all know tons of un and underemployed postdocs, right? Least I did.

Yeah, PhD level people are getting canned all over the place. I am a member of the American Chemical Society (ACS) and quite often the ACS discussion boards on LinkedIn talk about the unfortunate employment situation. I found it interesting to note that many of the PhD level scientists have been lamenting the lack of management/business schools in their doctorate training.

I have worked with many PhDs and while some of the more experienced folks got paid relatively well, the average starting salary for them really wasn't mind blowing at all. Certainly not for the amount of work put into getting their doctorate. I figured doing two years worth of schooling for a MBA is a much better investment than six (or whatever) years working on a PhD that will ultimately yield less pay (on average) than an MBA.

 

[StageLeft]

I posted here recently about some lunatics in my grad program talking about me hitting on girls in my program, saying I was already married or had a gf, and other nonsense. This has only gotten worse, ironically even as I've pretty much stopped talking to 95% of the people in the program.

Well, thursday evening I had another great exchange with a classmate. This girl in my class is doing her finals, and her laptop shits out on her. Corruption in some system file in XP. I offer to fix it for her (i know, I know. But we have finals due in a little over a week and that really does suck). She says 'great'. We have this exchange:

Her: Great, when can you do it?
Me: Well I work tomorrow, saturday & sunday. Sunday afternoon I could help though.
Her: Ugh, you can't do it tomorrow? Do you work all day, like noon to midnight?
Me: No I work 2-10.
Her: Do you roll out of bed at 1:59 and go to work?
Me: No, I get up at 9, eat breakfast, go to the gym, have a steak or something, then go to work.
Her: *walking away from me* this is RETARDED. I do not want to hear about your eating habits.
Me: Whargarbl.

So later I start getting text messages from her, about when I'm going to fix it for her, and what is wrong with me for not wanting to. Seriously. She walks away mid conversation, calls me a retard, and still expects me to help her the next day. I send a reply to her, along the lines of: "Being a bitch may help you fit in at BC but it gets you nowhere with me. Have fun at Best Buy. Try calling them retards, I heard that makes the Geek Squad work faster". Seriously though, what the FUCK is wrong with people in this program?? This girl is 24 years old and still acting like an entitled bitch.

The fvck. I hope she's VERY hot if she thinks she can treat people like that. I'm glad you didn't protypical nerd and just mumble under your breath and act like a little bitch and do it anyway, screw her!

Hmmm.. she's doing finals, Christmas is less than 2 weeks away and her computer isn't working.. I can totally get why she wouldn't want to wait 3 days before even attempting to get the computer fixed, just telling her that there was no way you could fit it into your schedule any sooner would probably have handled things and she'd have been off to seek other solutions.

He was merely elaborating for her benefit.

Your fault, don't volunteer unless you are actually going to come through. She shouldn't care about your eating habits and your ability to go work. If you volunteer you could fix instead of doing those things or wake up earlier.

Or she could wait. He was going to come through, just couldn't do it right away. If she didn't like it she could get her money back from him. Oh yeah she didn't pay.

MrMatt is right, you can't do sh*t in psychology with an undergrad. I have one, it's toilet paper. I knew that when I got it, though, so I am not in that field. In other fields a graduate degree may be an economically bad move. I do think that a lot of people spend an awfuuuuuuuul loooooong time acting as lab jockey for a prof making less money than mcdonalds well into their 20's. I have no idea why they do it.