OUR COMPANY GREEN TEAM HAS GONE TOO FAR!!

[JS80]

These damn wackos have too much power.

New Conservation Measures

Paper Use Reduction

Next week we will issue photo-copier account cards. All employees with printing needs will be assigned about 10 photo copies per month. If you exceed this number, you will need manager & finance approval before having more photo-copies credited to your account. For those of you tracking project work in the Joshua system, the photo copier card will help you track that expense to a specific project, as well.

RideShare

We?ve mapped out all employees and realize that many of us should be carpooling. Your carpool team will be emailed to you later this week. If you live within carpooling distance of colleagues and choose not to car-pool, we will be asking you to pay for your own parking (approximately $165/ month).

Water Conservation

?Yellow: Be Mellow - Brown: Flush it Down? - This is a great campaign that will help us reduce our water use. Since we are unable to replace our toilets with modern, energy-efficient models, we can easily conserve water by limiting the number of times we flush each day. 3 stalls in each bathroom will be designated for the Yellow / Brown Campaign. We think the campaign name says it all; but if you need the measure further explained, just see any Green Team member!

Low Carbon Load Lunch

No, not low carb ? Low Carbon! Many of us have become concerned about the amount of fuel used to bring strawberries up from Chile, raw fish from Japan, etc. Starting next week our Monday and Wednesday lunches will feature food grown & raised right here in Santa Monica; Fish caught at the Santa Monica pier & vegetables from the Student Garden at Santa Monica City College ? they used reclaimed city sewage to grow their vegetables. We hope this brings excitement and variety to the lunch program! To further reduce the carbon associated with our lunches, we?ll be asking employees to turn in their parking pass on Wednesdays ? to make sure we all stay in to enjoy the convenience of a meal brought in for us ? reduces stress; reduces carbon!

 

[Baked]

Obligatory 4/1.

 

[Platypus]

april fools from your company?

 

[jdini76]

Gotta be April Fools.

 

[Zenmervolt]

This has to be an April Fool's joke.

ZV

 

[tfinch2]

They got you. :laugh:

 

[IceBergSLiM]

The resignations come flying in at a pace that brings the internet to a halt.

 

[JulesMaximus]

Yeah right. I could see through this a mile away.

 

[HomeBrewerDude]

self-ownage 8/10

 

[Anubis]

the 1st one passed my BS meter the 2nd almost toped it but the 3rd just screamed BS and yea 4/1

 

[randay]

ROFL YELLOW BE MELLOW! BROWN DONT FROWN! GREEN, ITS STILL CLEAN!

 

[JS80]

Originally posted by: IcebergSlim
The resignations come flying in at a pace that brings the internet to a halt.

The funny thing is, I could hear people go "WTF" out loud as soon as this was sent. I thought it was pretty damn obvious but they had to send out an email assuring people it was a joke because of the influx of replies.

 

[Drako]

LOL, April Fools!!

This reminded me of years ago when I worked for a large government contractor, and we had to go to our admin to get office supplies. She would actually track how many pen/paper/notebooks people were using. She refused to give me a pen once because I had gotten one the previous week. Needless to say, I left the company shortly thereafter.

 

[legoman666]

10 copies per month should have tipped you off.

 

[TallBill]

lulz, nice work Green Team.