OMG sticky situation...WTF(NSFW)

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S

SAWYER

Lifer
Apr 27, 2000
16,742
42
91
Ok my wife went to a "Passion Party"(aka sex toy party) and was given a sampler pack which included a porn dvd sampler and a dildo. She brought it home and showed me and left the box on the dresser. Today my kids go in there and found it and came running in the living room laughing like crazy and my oldest is like "DAD check this movie out, it has boobs on it!!!'


AhhhhhhhhhhHH!!!!!!!!!!! I just know he will run and tell everyone and I will never hear the end of it from my family. Have you ever had an embarrassing situation like this?
 
J

JS80

Lifer
Oct 24, 2005
26,271
7
81
lol awesome I can't wait for embarrassing moments like this from my kids in the future

how old are your kids?
 
S

SAWYER

Lifer
Apr 27, 2000
16,742
42
91
Not awesome! My son refereed to the dildo as a hair curler! My kids are 9 and 7
 
Newbian

Newbian

Lifer
Aug 24, 2008
24,779
882
126
Better then finding your kid using the dildo I suppose. D:

Also pics of said wife and what movie was it? ;)
 
highland145

highland145

Lifer
Oct 12, 2009
43,973
6,338
136
My 9 year old asks Mom "What's sex?" After she recovers she tells him it's whether you're a boy or girl. For the best that he didn't ask me. I'd still be in hot water.
 
IronWing

IronWing

No Lifer
Jul 20, 2001
73,146
34,451
136
You'll have to do a harvest home on the kid. It's the only way to keep him from telling the world.
 
PottedMeat

PottedMeat

Lifer
Apr 17, 2002
12,363
475
126
SAWYER said:
Ok my wife went to a "Passion Party"(aka sex toy party) and was given a sampler pack which included a porn dvd sampler and a dildo. She brought it home and showed me and left the box on the dresser. Today my kids go in there and found it and came running in the living room laughing like crazy and my oldest is like "DAD check this movie out, it has boobs on it!!!'
Click to expand...

I think your kids are going to invite all their friends over.

At least the kids weren't beating each other with the dildo.

Bacon: Harry didn't think that he did a very good job, so he grabbed the nearest thing to hand, which just so happened to be a 15 inch black rubber cock, and proceeded to beat poor old Smithy to death with. And that was seen as a nice way to go. Now, that, is why you pay Hatchet Harry, when you owe.
Click to expand...
 
W

Wheezer

Diamond Member
Nov 2, 1999
6,731
1
81
SAWYER said:
Ok my wife went to a "Passion Party"(aka sex toy party) and was given a sampler pack which included a porn dvd sampler and a dildo. She brought it home and showed me and left the box on the dresser. Today my kids go in there and found it and came running in the living room laughing like crazy and my oldest is like "DAD check this movie out, it has boobs on it!!!'


AhhhhhhhhhhHH!!!!!!!!!!! I just know he will run and tell everyone and I will never hear the end of it from my family. Have you ever had an embarrassing situation like this?
Click to expand...

LMFAO....sorry, but that is just damn funny.

I know you don't feel like it now but think ahead in about ten years when your sitting around the table and one of them goes:

"Hey dad, do you remember when we found that stuff on the dresser in your room?"


Just wait until they walk in on you two doing it.
 
Regs

Regs

Lifer
Aug 9, 2002
16,666
21
81
lol. Man let me know how the difas thing works out.

The "sampler" pack haha.
 
Homerboy

Homerboy

Lifer
Mar 1, 2000
30,890
5,001
126
Wait. My wife went to one of those partys and didn't get any "sampler pack"!!! She did spend $60+ on stuff that SUCKS though. Moutless blow job lotion? WTF is that? Shit doesn't even work.

As to the OP... that's freaking classic. I have a 9 and 7 year old too. I don't know what I would do (excpet tell my wife it's her problem to fix :)).
 
S

SAWYER

Lifer
Apr 27, 2000
16,742
42
91
No she is about to start hosting them, this was a free kit from the lady who does them
 
dank69

dank69

Lifer
Oct 6, 2009
37,447
33,150
136
Whatever you do, don't use this as an opportunity to teach them about the birds and the bees. That's someone else's job.
 
Pliablemoose

Pliablemoose

Lifer
Oct 11, 1999
25,195
0
56
dank69 said:
Whatever you do, don't use this as an opportunity to teach them about the birds and the bees. That's someone else's job.
Click to expand...

"And sometimes little Sawyer, when daddy really loves mommy, and the goal is just sex for pleasure, daddy puts this "dildo" in mommy's rectum, using this pink "super anal lube" while he puts his penis in her vagina, while watching the video with boobs in it..."

You're right, perfect timing ():)
 
Homerboy

Homerboy

Lifer
Mar 1, 2000
30,890
5,001
126
dank69 said:
Whatever you do, don't use this as an opportunity to teach them about the birds and the bees. That's someone else's job.
Click to expand...

I think 9 and 7 may be a tad young for that :)
When you still believe in Santa, you should still believe in the Stork too :)
 
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