omg! I have a feeling I will get laid off / replaced.

andylawcc

Lifer
Mar 9, 2000
18,183
3
81
i work as a receptionist / office boy in a company, today I recieved this phone call from my human resource manager,
"hey Andy, pls keep a note for me that tomorrow there will be a lady name XXXX XXXX coming in for her job interview as a receptionist."
:Q :Q :eek: : O :eek:
what!?!?!? that's MY job!!! BACK OFF LADY! you ain't gonna take over me!! i am 4eva! i pwn j00!


:(
 

klah

Diamond Member
Aug 13, 2002
7,070
1
0
Originally posted by: andylawcc
i work as a receptionist / office boy in a company, today I recieved this phone call from my human resource manager,
"hey Andy, pls keep a note for me that tomorrow there will be a lady name XXXX XXXX coming in for her job interview as a receptionist."
:Q :Q :eek: : O :eek:
what!?!?!? that's MY job!!! BACK OFF LADY! you ain't gonna take over me!! i am 4eva! i pwn j00!

:(

They will probably ask you to train her before you are fired also.
 

Czar

Lifer
Oct 9, 1999
28,510
0
0
tell her that the job is no longer open and tell him she never showed up ;)

sucks though :(
 

slycat

Diamond Member
Jul 18, 2001
5,656
0
0
best approach?...go talk to HR...
if they are gonna do it, it'll happen no matter what and i'd rather know it for real
so i can start planning than sitting here wondering.
 

andylawcc

Lifer
Mar 9, 2000
18,183
3
81
you know what's the most ironic thing is?

last week I picked up a phone call, she said,
"Hi, my name is XXX XXXX, I would like to know is there any managerial Human Resource position available? and who's should I talk to?"

I immediately transfer her to my HR Manager and laughed.
 

ScrapSilicon

Lifer
Apr 14, 2001
13,625
0
0
Originally posted by: andylawcc
you know what's the most ironic thing is?

last week I picked up a phone call, she said,
"Hi, my name is XXX XXXX, I would like to know is there any managerial Human Resource position available? and who's should I talk to?"

I immediately transfer her to my HR Manager and laughed.

:(
 

abc

Diamond Member
Nov 26, 1999
3,116
0
0
andy, you did not right then and there inquire HR what is going on? I probably would have, or shortly after that.
 

andylawcc

Lifer
Mar 9, 2000
18,183
3
81
Originally posted by: abc
andy, you did not right then and there inquire HR what is going on? I probably would have, or shortly after that.

you did not do the right thing then?

is that what you were saying?
 

blahblah99

Platinum Member
Oct 10, 2000
2,689
0
0
Well, since your about to be screwed over by upper management at your job, might as well have some fun at work while it lasts:

Photocopy an entire dictionary and fax it to the CFO.

Call phone-sex numbers and transfer the calls at random.

"Accidentally" send a personal e-mail to the entire company voicing your disapproval of your boss's constant reference to the CEO as an "ugly, stupid, lazy, spineless pusy".

Write a coworker's initials in White-Out on the photocopier.

Schedule a series of important departmental meetings and forget to show up to them.

Send blank sheets of paper via interoffice mail. (Marked "urgent" and "confidential", of course.) Remember to send a few to the mailroom; they'll especially get a kick out of it.

Replace a commonly-accessed file on the computer network with a scanned image of your $ss. (An updated version of an old classic.)

Anonymously post quotes from Adolph Hitler on a company bulletin board. (Quotes about "team spirit" can be particularly inspiring.)

Adulterate other people's lunches: take bites out of sandwiches, sprinkle bacon bits in vegetarians' salads (also works well with Orthodox Jews), and spike the thermos of iced tea with grain alcohol.

See how long you can hide a paper bag full of tuna fish in the back of the refrigerator before someone notices it. (Writing someone else's name on the bag goes without saying.)

Put a paper bag full of your own feces in the microwave and leave it cooking on high.

Page someone over the company intercom with the message "Your sex-therapist is on the line and wants to reschedule the appointment."

Set a mouse free in the office each day. When the problem becomes an epidemic, send snakes after them.

Draw a flip-cartoon of a man running on the bottom of every notepad in the office supply closet.

Hide in the supply closet and scare people when they open the door.

Put a fake rubber hand in your sleeve, and when a secretary walks by, stick the hand in a paper shredder and scream.

When someone is at lunch, use their computer to e-mail a 200 megabyte database file to everyone in the company. The e-mail's subject, of course, should contain at least one vulgarity.

Misfile.

Hire a temp to do your job for you.

Submit letters of resignation for other employees.

Conduct all correspondence with your friend in the next office via Federal Express early-morning next-day delivery.

Submit a written complaint to the human resources department that, in your opinion, your boss spends a little too much time looking at pornography.

Tape a sign to a female employee's back that says "I've been sexually harassed."

Tape a sign to a female employee's back that says "Will f*ck for promotions."

Dial the phone number of the guy in the next cubicle whenever he walks away from his desk. Hang up before he can run back to answer it. Repeat often.

Hire a stripper for the office Christmas party.

Send counterfeit memos from the company president, politely letting employees know that they've been fired and must clear out their offices and leave the building immediately.

Covertly replace people's PowerPoint presentations with "director's cut" versions, containing a nice dose of nudity and misleading bar graphs.

Report rumors daily via the bathroom wall.

Pull a fire alarm while someone is in the bathroom.

Make sure your expense report contains at least one reference to the "client meeting" at the "gentleman's club".

Whenever a coworker makes a mistake, offer them the opportunity to "help you out" in exchange for you not reporting the mistake to their boss.

Sneak into the conference room before the next major meeting and place nametags in front of each of the seats. Assign black people to one side of the table and white people to the other.

Sew a tag containing a coworker's name into a jockstrap or bra, and leave it on the center of a conference table before a meeting. (Small sizes of these garments improve performance of the prank.)

Post a list of the communists in your company on a conspicuous bulletin board. If you're not sure who the communists are, take your best guess.

Take a stack of resumes from the recruitment department and schedule some interviews for fictional, but high-paying, positions.

Post your boss's telephone number to the alt.sex.prostitution discussion group.

Shoot a cap gun, bang some pots and pans, scream into a megaphone, or do whatever else it takes to have an enjoyable surprise birthday party for the senile old bastard that no one has the guts to fire.

Suggest to the human resources manager that the company picnic be replaced by a "fun day giving back to society", volunteering at a recycling center, soup kitchen, or drug rehab center. Increase your chances of success by making the suggestion in a crowded elevator.

Hand an envelope to the new guy and ask him to deliver the "cancellation of pension" memo to the sixty-four year old mailroom clerk.

See how many funerals in a row you can get away with leaving work early for.

Wallpaper your office with pictures of Christ.
And finally:


Respond to every request by your boss with the phrase "I would prefer not to."
 

notfred

Lifer
Feb 12, 2001
38,241
4
0
Originally posted by: andylawcc
Originally posted by: abc
andy, you did not right then and there inquire HR what is going on? I probably would have, or shortly after that.

you did not do the right thing then?

is that what you were saying?

let's try it like this:

you did not (right then and there inquire) HR what is going on?

Reworded:

You did not ask HR what was going on right then and there?
 

andylawcc

Lifer
Mar 9, 2000
18,183
3
81
blahblah99.... omg.... that was so so so funny.... too bad I am like the lowest rank 'personale' in this office so I don't have access to many facility that would allow me to pull the prank off.

and not like i will have the guts to do any of those anyways, except Hire a temp (my friend) to do my job and Put a paper bag full of your own feces in the microwave and leave it cooking on high. (okay, j/k :) )



and thanks notfred, I get it now.

but I thought it would be rude to ask the manager such question...
 

NutBucket

Lifer
Aug 30, 2000
27,179
649
126
Be realistic Andy, if this chick is reasonably attractive you don't stand a chance:p;)

That said, sucks if you really do have to train your replacement. I would try to find out what's going on.
 

andylawcc

Lifer
Mar 9, 2000
18,183
3
81
Originally posted by: NutBucket
Be realistic Andy, if this chick is reasonably attractive you don't stand a chance:p;)

That said, sucks if you really do have to train your replacement. I would try to find out what's going on.



humm... I never thought of that... she could be a hot chick.
hey! cool for me, I get to "mentor" a chick. :)
"Okay Jennifer, now part of the training will require some oral work, picking up phone call that is. :wink"
 

rayma2

Senior member
Nov 12, 2001
821
0
0
yeah you should go talk to your HR and see what is going on.. that way you know if you really need to start looking for a new job.
 

dc

Diamond Member
Nov 26, 1999
9,998
2
0
fob boy, go find out what's up. better to know if it's coming than just sitting on your butt wondering if you're gonna get replaced.
 

vi edit

Elite Member
Super Moderator
Oct 28, 1999
62,484
8,345
126
Just tell your boss that however many bj's she promised, you'll double it.
 

spaceman

Lifer
Dec 4, 2000
17,617
183
106
she's applying for your position and you are expected to train her.
i know what i'd say to my boss....
 

rudder

Lifer
Nov 9, 2000
19,441
86
91
maybe your such a good office boy that you are getting promoted to executive secretary.
 

scorp00

Senior member
Mar 21, 2001
994
0
71
Maybe it's someone's personal receptionist? Or they feel the need to have 2 in different locations? There are only around 100 people that work here, and at least 30-40 are receptionist types that handle all of the mounds of paperwork.