Old people sayings

[scootermaster]

Not so much, like, jokes or whatever, but just normal every-day phrases that old people use.

 

[SlowSpyder]

Well isn't that a dilly of a pickle.

 

[krunchykrome]

"When I was your age, I would walk to work and back uphill.....bothways"

 

[Homerboy]

"The metric system is the tool of the devil! My car gets 40 rods to the hogshead, and that's the way I likes it!"

 

[TuxDave]

"peachy keen"

 

[HN]

Back in my day they used to say "Back in my day...[insert story of something back in the day]"

 

[KarenMarie]

My 76 year old father always said:

Better to have it and not need it, than need it and not have it.

Hope for the best, but expect the worst.

Live hard, die young and make a good looking corpse.

I have been here longer than I am gonna be here... so I'm gonna have fun.

Whatever ya wanna do....!!!

 

[Spydermag68]

Oh Snap

 

[PepePeru]

"hell's bells"
"every tom, dick & harry"

 

[nonameo]

"Let's talk about Jesus and potatoes"

"Well glory be!"

edit: my dad used to say these"

Hotter than a two-peckered billygoat

colder than a witch's tit in a brass bra.

 

[CrackRabbit]

"That's as useless as tits on a boar hog."

 

[MrPickins]

Originally posted by: CrackRabbit
"That's as useless as tits on a boar hog."

LOL I was gonna post that.

"It's raining like a cow pissin' on a flat rock"

"Go over yonder and get that ___ for me"

 

[randomint]

"mama didn't raise no fool!"

 

[handoverfist]

Don't be so george.

Just joshin ya.

That dog won't hunt.

 

[scootermaster]

Originally posted by: G Wizard
"hell's bells"
"every tom, dick & harry"

See, these are the first good ones.

Crap like "as the crow flies" or whatever. Or just people using the word "ornery". That kinda stuff. More?

 

[Barfo]

Live free or die hard...oh wait...

 

[scootermaster]

Originally posted by: handoverfist
Don't be so george.

Just joshin ya.

That dog won't hunt.

Like "just funnin' ya"

I guess I mean more old people 'words' than sayings, but sayings work too.

 

[Accipiter22]

20 rods to a furlong!

 

[Whoozyerdaddy]

"That sh*ttin' thing wont work!" Good ol' Grandpa

"I gotta piss like a racehorse!" Ditto...

 

[Evander]

"Full of piss and vinegar!"

 

[Zenmervolt]

"Just for sh*ts and giggles."

ZV

 

[pnad]

My Grandmother used to say some messed up stuff.

"In a pig's a$$!" Like 'in a pig's eye' or point of view but different.
GM: Go clean up your room.
Kid: It IS clean!
GM: In a pig's a$$ its clean!

Some other notable favorites:
"Take a long walk on a short pier"
"Go play marbles on the highway"
"Your a$$ sucks buttermilk" <-- I never understood that one.
"Up your a$$ with a BB gun"
"Up Mike's a$$" <-- No idea who Mike is/was.

Grandma was a mean alcoholic with an obvious anal obsession.

 

[xochi]

I'd like to send this letter to the Prussian consulate in Siam by aeromail. Am I too late for the 4:30 autogyro?

 

[angminas]

Taking care of us kids was like pouring water down a rathole, because we were always barking up the wrong tree. Mom also used to swear in Dutch quite often, though she didn't really know what it meant.

Originally posted by: KarenMarie
My 76 year old father always said:

Better to have it and not need it, than need it and not have it.

I say this one all the time, usually to my mother

 

[wheresmybacon]

"My lands!" (shock, surprise)
"That really frosts my cake!" (anger)
"Well she's just a floozy" (skanky woman/girl)