>>> Official I'M DEPRESSED!!! thread <<<

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bleuiko

Golden Member
Feb 22, 2001
1,980
0
71
It seems a lot of people are having a hard time right now. (Or maybe i'm slow with reading posts) Anyway, post anything that bothers you here, if nothing else, we can give some morale support. I'm still pretty new here, but I know that as much as some of the posts seem stupid, mean and inappropriate, we really do care. Maybe it might help to talk about it to total strangers, I don't know. But we will try. Here is a poem to start us off:

IF YOU THINK

If you think you are beaten, you are.
If you think you dare not, you don't!
If you want to win, but think you can't,
It's almost a cinch you won't.

If you think you'll lose, you're lost;
For out in the world we find
Success begins with a fellow's will;
It's all in the state of the mind.

Life's battles don't always go
To the stronger and faster man,
But sooner or later the man who wins
Is the man who thinks he can.

Walter D. Wintle
 
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NikPreviousAcct

No Lifer
Aug 15, 2000
52,763
1
0
A thread dedicated to depression? Hmm. That's a very peachy-keen poem, but a bit shallow. I guess I win then.


bad: I can't sleep from all this sugar. :)

good: I'm getting to see an old friend later this summer. :D :D :D
 
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Madcowz

Platinum Member
Jul 23, 2000
2,652
0
0
well let's see here... I need a girl and I hate myself... yet I'm pretty much depressed! :(

It's not THAT bad, I just seem to ponder these things &amp; get myself down a bit more than I should be. Anyways I posted this a little while back, maybe someone can offer help/support?:

&quot;About a year a two or so I all of a sudden became self-conscious and everything went downhill from there. I'm doing a little better now... I really don't care much of what others think of me, but my lack of communication skills still remain. I'm not much the small talker and I usually have problems creating conversation and maintaining it. Like I can start a conversation but I usually have trouble keeping it going. As with many ppl I feel uncomfortable as silence takes over and my mind starts racing, trying to find something to say to fill in the silence. Everything has to be planned w/ me... that's why I love talking on the internet... you have all the time in the world to prepare what you're going to say next and you can always correct yourself w/o anyone noticing screwups.
You see, I suck at improv and am not particularily witty, so I'm usually too busy concentrating on what to say next which I believe prevents me from listening to the other person as well as I should be and extracting from what is said to build on it. The thing is, when I'm not too focused on what to say next, I'm usually silent for the most part or I end up being unprepared and tend to mess up... so I'm screwed either way . All this thinking in the heat of conversation I guess leads to more screw ups... I might end up not making much sense or I might not be particularly smooth on my delivery. You see, my problem is not so much shyness or anxiety, but rather my communication/social skills. What leads me to believe this is the fact that I have no reason to be nervous or anxious in front of close friends/family, and yet I'm still not much smoother in speech as compared to strangers and girls. Also, I'm not the kind of guy who's afraid of talking out, and I usually never hold out even though I usually end up screwing up somehow, making myself look and sound stupid. It's rather fustrating b/c I can't for the life of me figure out how to help myself!
Anyways just thought I'd pent a little... hell I might find some good advice here! &quot;

To add a little, I would just like to say that I simply don't know how to act around girls. I had a couple of girls over last night, and although I wasn't shaking in my pants or anything like that, needless to say, I was a bit on the reserved side. I wish I could just be more spontaneous and wild; you know, not let my mind stop or slow me down. I'm constantly pondering what to say/do next and I always have to have some kind of plan. Like I won't initiate conversation unless I have it all planned out, b/c I know I'll probably screw up since I'm not particularly smooth unprepared. I always want to meet new people, make new friends and get a girl, but I'm just too damn self-conscious and lack much of the social skills needed. I wish I could just go up to girls like that, but I never know what to say. I dunno, I guess it doesn't help the fact that the girls I'm enfatuated w/ are almost complete strangers to me. Anyone else feel like the girls your interested in are the one's you don't know or have the opportunity of connecting with (ie, have in a class or whatever)?
 
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bleuiko

Golden Member
Feb 22, 2001
1,980
0
71
Madcowz:


<< As with many ppl I feel uncomfortable as silence takes over and my mind starts racing, trying to find something to say to fill in the silence. Everything has to be planned w/ me... that's why I love talking on the internet... you have all the time in the world to prepare what you're going to say next and you can always correct yourself w/o anyone noticing screwups. >>


You're rite, we all have that problem... its not all your fault... maybe the other person is feeling the exact same way. As for the internet thing, just don't rely on it too much, person-person live talking is better, just have to get use to it.


<< . Like I won't initiate conversation unless I have it all planned out, b/c I know I'll probably screw up since I'm not particularly smooth unprepared. I always want to meet new people, make new friends and get a girl, but I'm just too damn self-conscious and lack much of the social skills needed. >>


I think you've pretty much figured this one out yourself, stop thinking about what OTHERs are gonna think! Just do it! Say stupid stuff... act dumb, it doesn't matter! Real people are funny, they are spontanous... we all are, but when you forget that and try to be perfect, you screw up... just DON'T think about it.


<< I wish I could just go up to girls like that, but I never know what to say. I dunno, I guess it doesn't help the fact that the girls I'm enfatuated w/ are almost complete strangers to me. Anyone else feel like the girls your interested in are the one's you don't know or have the opportunity of connecting with (ie, have in a class or whatever)? >>


You're going at this all wrong... reminds me of myself a little while back... but I know better now... you can't really like someone that you don't know... so forget about trying to &quot;be with&quot; that person when you talk to her, just chill... get to know her better, and then, if you still like what you here, THEN act on it... you're jumping ahead.
 
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bleuiko

Golden Member
Feb 22, 2001
1,980
0
71
JimmyEatWorld:


<< so the remaining time I spent with her was her BLAMING ME FOR NOT SEALING IT. She flat out refused to apologize, or even admit that she did anything wrong. I was furious. Am I crazy, or is this not my fault at all. I wasn't even blaming her, until she started blaming me, then I couldn't let that go. She was literally screaming at me >>


Parents are all like that, they don't like to be wrong (i'm not saying she's wrong or you're wrong), but the idea of BEING WRONG is horrible for them because they realize that they don't know everything, and if they don't know everything, how can they protect you from the world? The world is a cruel and dangerous place, and parents can't afford to be wrong... for your sake. Your mom is probably just worried about what's going to happen to the taxes to think about the moral issue here... parents are people too.
 
S

skylark

Senior member
Feb 24, 2001
798
0
0


<< well let's see here... I need a girl and I hate myself... yet I'm pretty much depressed! :(

It's not THAT bad, I just seem to ponder these things &amp; get myself down a bit more than I should be. Anyways I posted this a little while back, maybe someone can offer help/support?:

&quot;About a year a two or so I all of a sudden became self-conscious and everything went downhill from there. I'm doing a little better now... I really don't care much of what others think of me, but my lack of communication skills still remain. I'm not much the small talker and I usually have problems creating conversation and maintaining it. Like I can start a conversation but I usually have trouble keeping it going. As with many ppl I feel uncomfortable as silence takes over and my mind starts racing, trying to find something to say to fill in the silence. Everything has to be planned w/ me... that's why I love talking on the internet... you have all the time in the world to prepare what you're going to say next and you can always correct yourself w/o anyone noticing screwups.
You see, I suck at improv and am not particularily witty, so I'm usually too busy concentrating on what to say next which I believe prevents me from listening to the other person as well as I should be and extracting from what is said to build on it. The thing is, when I'm not too focused on what to say next, I'm usually silent for the most part or I end up being unprepared and tend to mess up... so I'm screwed either way . All this thinking in the heat of conversation I guess leads to more screw ups... I might end up not making much sense or I might not be particularly smooth on my delivery. You see, my problem is not so much shyness or anxiety, but rather my communication/social skills. What leads me to believe this is the fact that I have no reason to be nervous or anxious in front of close friends/family, and yet I'm still not much smoother in speech as compared to strangers and girls. Also, I'm not the kind of guy who's afraid of talking out, and I usually never hold out even though I usually end up screwing up somehow, making myself look and sound stupid. It's rather fustrating b/c I can't for the life of me figure out how to help myself!
Anyways just thought I'd pent a little... hell I might find some good advice here! &quot;

To add a little, I would just like to say that I simply don't know how to act around girls. I had a couple of girls over last night, and although I wasn't shaking in my pants or anything like that, needless to say, I was a bit on the reserved side. I wish I could just be more spontaneous and wild; you know, not let my mind stop or slow me down. I'm constantly pondering what to say/do next and I always have to have some kind of plan. Like I won't initiate conversation unless I have it all planned out, b/c I know I'll probably screw up since I'm not particularly smooth unprepared. I always want to meet new people, make new friends and get a girl, but I'm just too damn self-conscious and lack much of the social skills needed. I wish I could just go up to girls like that, but I never know what to say. I dunno, I guess it doesn't help the fact that the girls I'm enfatuated w/ are almost complete strangers to me. Anyone else feel like the girls your interested in are the one's you don't know or have the opportunity of connecting with (ie, have in a class or whatever)? >>



hmm.. it sounds like SAD (social anxiety disorder)?? it DOES seem like what you described is a neurosis that can be treated.

uhm.. have you talked to anyone about this problem?? I know there are antidepressants out in the market that treats SAD too besides just mood and anxiety disorders.

 
G

gooseman

Diamond Member
Oct 23, 2000
4,853
1
0
Bleuiko, I carry that poem in my wallet. When I played Junior High Football my coach gave that to all of us and it has really meant something to me ever since. It's been in my wallet so long that it has turned yellow now. It is great advice, learn from it.
 
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DesignDawg

Diamond Member
Oct 9, 1999
3,919
0
0
I thread on the internet helping depressed people? Isn't that like handing someone a gun to help them stop thinking about suicide? Or maybe giving someone the keys to a ferrari to help them stop speeding? If anyone is depressed, the FIRST THING they should do is GET THE HELL OFF THE COMPUTER.

Just MO.

Ricky
DesignDawg
 
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JimmyEatWorld

Platinum Member
Dec 12, 2000
2,007
0
0
Bleuiko: thankyou for taking the time to read my little post :) I appreciate it. As for what you said, you are correct...but it was just so frustrating today, that I couldn't take it. Parents...gotta love em, but sometimes they just plain piss you off. oh well ;)
 
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ppaik

Platinum Member
Nov 11, 2000
2,408
0
76
boy these are long ass threads......guys guys wake up!!! Sometimes life is depressing....sometimes you go through some shiet....but life becomes good again when you stop crying about it...


my cure for my depression ummmm 3-4 years ago was to listen to a stupid song about drinking....and since then i do not allow myself to get depressed anymore :) see

well if ya wanna know what song it was....it was chumbawamba(sp)-i get knicked down but i get up again....you never gonna keep me down!!! weird...but after listening to that song on a very depressing day....i said screw this....i owe so much more to myself and never again.

:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)
:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)


GOOD VIBES GOOD VIBES GOOD VIBES GOOD VIBES GOOD VIBES GOOD VIBES GOOD VIBES GOOD VIBES
 
C

CvAgent

Senior member
Oct 27, 2000
323
0
0
I agree with bleuiko and JimmyEatWorld:

One word: Girls

Other than related to the above:

A 25k raise would be nice :)
 
W

whoisx3ro

Banned
Apr 6, 2001
100
0
0
Come on dOods...lighten up, stop worrying about things, and everything will get better!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Brightest Star - by x3ro

It's dark...
The moon is bright, the stars alive...
The gentle clouds race across the night sky...
My mind wonders far,
Peering at a particular star...
Brighter than the rest,
Trying to be the best...
Starlight, starbright,
I think I'll make a wish tonight...
I wish your beauty could last forever,
Even at the dawn of early morning light...
Your beautiful innocence,
Shining like a smooth-cut sapphire...
You're wonderful example,
Wishing to make myself aspire,
In everything I do,
Everything I am,
I wish, I too,
Could be as beautiful as you...
Maybe someday, this wish will come true...
But for now, I'll let my imperfections through,
I'll let my flaws show,
Maybe someday, I'll be as wonderful as you...
Maybe some day, I'll be perfect too...
Maybe one day, I too can be an example...
One that outshines the others...
But for now, beautiful star,
I'll be me,
And you continue to be you...
 
B

bleuiko

Golden Member
Feb 22, 2001
1,980
0
71
DesignDawg:


<< I thread on the internet helping depressed people? Isn't that like handing someone a gun to help them stop thinking about suicide? Or maybe giving someone the keys to a ferrari to help them stop speeding? If anyone is depressed, the FIRST THING they should do is GET THE HELL OFF THE COMPUTER. >>


A gun? Nah, I don't think so, but in a way, yes... this is more like Alchohol Anonyamous... we're not trying to get people more depressed, but yes, there is a reason for depression and sometime, somewhere you're gonna HAVE to face it. This might not be as rewarding as talking to a friend, but every little bit helps. To get past your problem you're gonna have to identify and understand it first.


whoisx3ro: thanks for the poem!!


THE STARFISH

Once upon a time there was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work. One day he was walking along the shore. As he looked down the beach, he saw a human figure moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself to think of someone who would dance to the day. So he began to walk faster to catch up. As he got closer, he saw that it was a young man and the young man wasn't dancing, but instead he was reaching down to the shore, picking up something and very gently and throwing it into the ocean.

As he got closer he called out, &quot;Good morning! What are you doing?&quot;

The young man paused, looked up and replied, &quot;Throwing the starfish back into the ocean.&quot;

&quot;I guess I should have asked, why are you throwing starfish in the ocean?&quot;

&quot;The sun is up, and the tide is going out. And if I don't throw them in they'll die.&quot;

&quot;But, young man, don't you realize that there are miles and miles of beach, and starfish all along it. You can't possibly make a difference!&quot;

The young man listened politely. Then bent down, picked another starfish and threw it into the sea, past the breaking waves and said,

&quot;It made a difference for that one.&quot;

---------------
There is something very special in each and every one of us.
We have all been gifted with the ability to make a difference.
And if we can become aware of that gift,
we gain through the strength of our visions the power to shape the future.
We must each find our starfish.
And if we throw our stars wisely and well,
the world will be blessed.

-Author Unknown (Old story, this variation contributed by Sherrie Davis)
 
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pulse8

Lifer
May 3, 2000
20,860
1
81


<< well let's see here... I need a girl and I hate myself... yet I'm pretty much depressed! :(

It's not THAT bad, I just seem to ponder these things &amp; get myself down a bit more than I should be. Anyways I posted this a little while back, maybe someone can offer help/support?:

&quot;About a year a two or so I all of a sudden became self-conscious and everything went downhill from there. I'm doing a little better now... I really don't care much of what others think of me, but my lack of communication skills still remain. I'm not much the small talker and I usually have problems creating conversation and maintaining it. Like I can start a conversation but I usually have trouble keeping it going. As with many ppl I feel uncomfortable as silence takes over and my mind starts racing, trying to find something to say to fill in the silence. Everything has to be planned w/ me... that's why I love talking on the internet... you have all the time in the world to prepare what you're going to say next and you can always correct yourself w/o anyone noticing screwups.
You see, I suck at improv and am not particularily witty, so I'm usually too busy concentrating on what to say next which I believe prevents me from listening to the other person as well as I should be and extracting from what is said to build on it. The thing is, when I'm not too focused on what to say next, I'm usually silent for the most part or I end up being unprepared and tend to mess up... so I'm screwed either way . All this thinking in the heat of conversation I guess leads to more screw ups... I might end up not making much sense or I might not be particularly smooth on my delivery. You see, my problem is not so much shyness or anxiety, but rather my communication/social skills. What leads me to believe this is the fact that I have no reason to be nervous or anxious in front of close friends/family, and yet I'm still not much smoother in speech as compared to strangers and girls. Also, I'm not the kind of guy who's afraid of talking out, and I usually never hold out even though I usually end up screwing up somehow, making myself look and sound stupid. It's rather fustrating b/c I can't for the life of me figure out how to help myself!
Anyways just thought I'd pent a little... hell I might find some good advice here! &quot;

To add a little, I would just like to say that I simply don't know how to act around girls. I had a couple of girls over last night, and although I wasn't shaking in my pants or anything like that, needless to say, I was a bit on the reserved side. I wish I could just be more spontaneous and wild; you know, not let my mind stop or slow me down. I'm constantly pondering what to say/do next and I always have to have some kind of plan. Like I won't initiate conversation unless I have it all planned out, b/c I know I'll probably screw up since I'm not particularly smooth unprepared. I always want to meet new people, make new friends and get a girl, but I'm just too damn self-conscious and lack much of the social skills needed. I wish I could just go up to girls like that, but I never know what to say. I dunno, I guess it doesn't help the fact that the girls I'm enfatuated w/ are almost complete strangers to me. Anyone else feel like the girls your interested in are the one's you don't know or have the opportunity of connecting with (ie, have in a class or whatever)? >>



Well, I know exactly how to feel. I'm the same exact way. I have problems with holding small talk unless I know the person. When I first meet someone, I don't really have all that much to say to them, regardless of their sex. Something that's helped me is just asking basic questions. What school do they go to, what do they do for work, where are they from. That kinda thing. You'll usually find them mentioning something you know about and then the conversation will go from there. Something else that I try to do is just be myself. I'm always worrying what the other person is thinking of me or if what I say sounds dumb. If the person doesn't like you, it's ok. If you say something that they don't agree with, it's alright, too. You're still you and if they don't like it, there will always be someone else who does. This is something that can be hard to do. I actually considered the fact that I could have Social Anxiety Disorder. I've realized, at least for me, that it's not so much a chemical inbalance that I don't like most social situations. It's just because I fear them because of the anxiety I feel when I'm in them. The reason, though, I feel this axiety is because I'm worrying about myself. Which I think makes it more of a self-confidence issue more than anything. The way I've been working around this is to put myself in these situations and make them work. If they don't the first time, then it's ok. Just try again. Another thing is to realize that most people in those same situations would react the same exact way as you. I hope some of this may help you.

David
 
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Static911

Diamond Member
Nov 24, 2000
4,338
1
0
got paper due at 6:30 and not finished...that is depressing

also in 1k debt that I can pay off in 1 month <---very depressing cuz I've never been in debt XCEPT For a non-interest loan from my dad for college

Static911
 
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