Office Space quote thread!

[Balt]

Bob Porter: Looks like you've been missing a lot of work lately.

Peter: I wouldn't say I've been 'missing' it Bob.

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Peter: I think that the guy might actually be able to help. I mean, he did help Anne lose weight.

Samir: Peter, she's anorexic.

Peter: Yeah, I know. They guy's really good.

 

[KnickNut3]

Ha..have you seen my stapler? It's a red Swingline...

 

[95SS]

WTF????? No one has come up with this yet??


Peter Gibbons : What would you do if you had a million dollars?
Lawrence : I'll tell you what I'd do, man, two chicks at the same time, man.
Peter Gibbons : That's it? If you had a million dollars, you'd do two chicks at the same time?
Lawrence : Damn straight. I always wanted to do that, man. And I think if I had a million dollars I could hook that up, cause chicks dig a dude with money.
Peter Gibbons : Well, not all chicks.
Lawrence : Well the kind of chicks that'd double up on a dude like me do.
Peter Gibbons : Good point.

 

[InverseOfNeo]

OMG this is hillarious, I was just thinking about a thread like this earlier today.

 

[Howard]

Originally posted by: InverseOfNeo
OMG this is hillarious, I was just thinking about a thread like this earlier today.

That is the worst idea I've ever heard. Yes, this is horrible, this idea.

 

[dnuggett]

Mr. Nagga Nagga not gonna work here anymore.

 

[CVSiN]

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Samir : No, not again. I... why does it say paper jam when there is no paper jam? I swear to God, one of these days, I just kick this piece of sh1t out the window.
Michael Bolton : You and me both, man. That thing is lucky I'm not armed.
Samir : Piece of sh1t.

 

[SP33Demon]

Originally posted by: fisher
If we get caught, we're not going to white-collar resort prison. No, no, no. We're going to federal POUND ME IN THE ASS prison.

Yes this was Jamal Lewis's favorite line.

 

[CVSiN]

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Peter Gibbons : What would you do if you had a million dollars?
Lawrence : I'll tell you what I'd do, man, two chicks at the same time, man.
Peter Gibbons : That's it? If you had a million dollars, you'd do two chicks at the same time?
Lawrence : Damn straight. I always wanted to do that, man. And I think if I had a million dollars I could hook that up, cause chicks dig a dude with money.
Peter Gibbons : Well, not all chicks.
Lawrence : Well the kind of chicks that'd double up on a dude like me do.
Peter Gibbons : Good point.
Lawrence : Well what about you now? what would you do?
Peter Gibbons : Besides two chicks at the same time?
Lawrence : Well yeah.
Peter Gibbons : Nothing.
Lawrence : Nothing, huh?
Peter Gibbons : I'd relax, I would sit on my ass all day, I would do nothing.
Lawrence : Well you don't need a million dollars to do nothing, man. Just take a look at my cousin, he's broke, don't do shit.

 

[CVSiN]

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Joanna : So, where do you work, Peter?
Peter Gibbons : Initech.
Joanna : In-yeah, what do you do there?
Peter Gibbons : I sit in a cubicle and I update bank software for the 2000 switch.
Joanna : What's that?
Peter Gibbons : Well see, they wrote all this bank software, and, uh, to save space, they used two digits instead of four. So like 98 instead of 1998? Uh, so I go through these thousands of lines of code and, uh... it doesn't really matter. I uh, I don't like my job, and, uh, I don't think I'm gonna go anymore.
Joanna : You're just not gonna go?
Peter Gibbons : Yeah.
Joanna : Won't you get fired?
Peter Gibbons : I don't know, but I really don't like it, and, uh, I'm not gonna go.
Joanna : So you're gonna quit?
Peter Gibbons : Nah-uh. Not really. Uh... I'm just gonna stop going.
Joanna : When did you decide all that?
Peter Gibbons : About an hour ago.
Joanna : An hour ago... so you're gonna get another job?
Peter Gibbons : I don't think I'd like another job.
Joanna : Well, what are you going to do about money and bills and...
Peter Gibbons : You know, I've never really liked paying bills. I don't think I'm gonna do that, either.
Joanna : So what do you wanna do?
Peter Gibbons : First I'm gonna take you out to dinner and then I'm gonna go back to my apartment and watch kung fu. Do you ever watch kung fu?
Joanna : I love kung fu.
Peter Gibbons : Channel 39.
Joanna : Totally.
Peter Gibbons : You should come over and watch kung fu tonight.
Joanna : Ok. Ok. Can we order lunch first? Ok.

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Ding 1000 posts =-P

 

[CraigRT]

one of my favorite parts of the entire movie is when they are talking about michael's name
to make a long story short:

"why should i change my name, he's the one who sucks!"

 

[SP33Demon]

Originally posted by: CVSiN
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Joanna : So, where do you work, Peter?
Peter Gibbons : Initech.
Joanna : In-yeah, what do you do there?
Peter Gibbons : I sit in a cubicle and I update bank software for the 2000 switch.
Joanna : What's that?
Peter Gibbons : Well see, they wrote all this bank software, and, uh, to save space, they used two digits instead of four. So like 98 instead of 1998? Uh, so I go through these thousands of lines of code and, uh... it doesn't really matter. I uh, I don't like my job, and, uh, I don't think I'm gonna go anymore.
Joanna : You're just not gonna go?
Peter Gibbons : Yeah.
Joanna : Won't you get fired?
Peter Gibbons : I don't know, but I really don't like it, and, uh, I'm not gonna go.
Joanna : So you're gonna quit?
Peter Gibbons : Nah-uh. Not really. Uh... I'm just gonna stop going.
Joanna : When did you decide all that?
Peter Gibbons : About an hour ago.
Joanna : An hour ago... so you're gonna get another job?
Peter Gibbons : I don't think I'd like another job.
Joanna : Well, what are you going to do about money and bills and...
Peter Gibbons : You know, I've never really liked paying bills. I don't think I'm gonna do that, either.
Joanna : So what do you wanna do?
Peter Gibbons : First I'm gonna take you out to dinner and then I'm gonna go back to my apartment and watch kung fu. Do you ever watch kung fu?
Joanna : I love kung fu.
Peter Gibbons : Channel 39.
Joanna : Totally.
Peter Gibbons : You should come over and watch kung fu tonight.
Joanna : Ok. Ok. Can we order lunch first? Ok.

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Ding 1000 posts =-P

Why don't you just post the whole fvcking movie while you're at it?

 

[CVSiN]

geez man pull the gerbil out of your ass and lighten up..
that is 1 quote from the IMDB site...
get over it =P

http://imdb.com/title/tt0151804/quotes