"No one whose testicles are crushed or whose male organ is cut off shall enter the assembly of the LORD"

[Shawn]

Deuteronomy 23:1

 

[blackdogdeek]

so no married guys in heaven i guess

 

[Leros]

I love the bible. Its funny.

 

[ElFenix]

vasectomies mean no heaven. awesome.

 

[Ktulu]

Take care of your junk guys, it's your ticket to heaven!

 

[Dumac]

Lol. This is the most random, yet funny, post.

 

[BoberFett]

Originally posted by: ElFenix
vasectomies mean no heaven. awesome.

Men who get vasectomies are obviously sex fiends and going straight to hell. I know I am.

 

[BrownTown]

Originally posted by: ElFenix
vasectomies mean no heaven. awesome.

last i checked they didn't crush your nuts or cut off your penis when you have a vasectomy...

 

[Eeezee]

Originally posted by: ElFenix
vasectomies mean no heaven. awesome.

Nah, the male organ wasn't cut off, but it was cut. And it certainly wasn't crushed. Rejoice, vasectomies don't disqualify you! Those guys from Jackass thankfully won't be able to make it, though.

 

[yllus]

Man, talk about adding insult to painful injury.

 

[xSauronx]

Originally posted by: Leros
I love the bible. Its funny.

damn right.

 

[OVerLoRDI]

Got to wonder about those entries in the bible. Although I think it would only apply to those who did such things to themselves by choice. So no sick bastards in heaven.

 

[Trevelyan]

In case anyone wants a serious explanation to this very strange verse, here it is:

Back in the time of the Israelites, self mutilation was a common form of pagan worship. There was a lot of this going on all around the Israelites, and God was making a point that they are not to participate. Obviously, it seems very strange that crushing your junk would be a form of pagan worship, but hey, stranger things have happened.

 

[xSauronx]

Originally posted by: Trevelyan
In case anyone wants a serious explanation to this very strange verse, here it is:

Back in the time of the Israelites, self mutilation was a common form of pagan worship. There was a lot of this going on all around the Israelites, and God was making a point that they are not to participate. Obviously, it seems very strange that crushing your junk would be a form of pagan worship, but hey, stranger things have happened.

stranger things *have* happened

i seem to recall a story from last year (i probably caught in on fark) about some guys in a run-down house in north carolina castrating themselves for the hell of it.

 

[Compton]

Originally posted by: xSauronx

stranger things *have* happened

i seem to recall a story from last year (i probably caught in on fark) about some guys in a run-down house in north carolina castrating themselves for the hell of it.

I had forgotten about that. I think that was posted here too. That was one of the most disturbing things I think I've ever read.

 

[Mucho]

Most of the 39 members of the Heaven's Gate cult who took their own lives in 1997 were castrated as a means to repressed their homosexuality. These things still happen.

 

[Lonyo]

Originally posted by: Trevelyan
In case anyone wants a serious explanation to this very strange verse, here it is:

Back in the time of the Israelites, self mutilation was a common form of pagan worship. There was a lot of this going on all around the Israelites, and God was making a point that they are not to participate. Obviously, it seems very strange that crushing your junk would be a form of pagan worship, but hey, stranger things have happened.

Ironically, the Romans thought that circumcision was disgusting, and it was one reason they didn't like the Jews.

 

[biggestmuff]

That's from the Old Testament, the old Word.

 

[DaShen]

Originally posted by: blackdogdeek
so no married guys in heaven i guess

Hahahaha... NICE ONE :thumbsup:

 

[0roo0roo]

sounds like an instruction on what to do to the infidel no?

 

[SaltBoy]

The King James translation is more poetic:

He that is wounded in the stones, or hath his privy member cut off, shall not enter into the congregation of the LORD.

 

[Number1]

Originally posted by: xSauronx

Originally posted by: Trevelyan
In case anyone wants a serious explanation to this very strange verse, here it is:

Back in the time of the Israelites, self mutilation was a common form of pagan worship. There was a lot of this going on all around the Israelites, and God was making a point that they are not to participate. Obviously, it seems very strange that crushing your junk would be a form of pagan worship, but hey, stranger things have happened.

stranger things *have* happened

i seem to recall a story from last year (i probably caught in on fark) about some guys in a run-down house in north carolina castrating themselves for the hell of it.

There was a video of a guy cutting his penis off and then taking his nuts out in another forum. I was unable to watch it past the part where he starts cutting.

 

[RapidSnail]

Originally posted by: SaltBoy
The King James translation is more poetic:

He that is wounded in the stones, or hath his privy member cut off, shall not enter into the congregation of the LORD.

:thumbsup:

Despite your religious orientation, you've got to admit that the KJV has some of the most beautifully written language in all literature.

Apparently this is supposed to mean that a man with missing the whole or parts of his secrets cannot enter heaven. I'll just tell you that's not true, and leave it at that.

Have fun!

 

[RapidSnail]

Originally posted by: Number1

Originally posted by: xSauronx

Originally posted by: Trevelyan
In case anyone wants a serious explanation to this very strange verse, here it is:

Back in the time of the Israelites, self mutilation was a common form of pagan worship. There was a lot of this going on all around the Israelites, and God was making a point that they are not to participate. Obviously, it seems very strange that crushing your junk would be a form of pagan worship, but hey, stranger things have happened.

stranger things *have* happened

i seem to recall a story from last year (i probably caught in on fark) about some guys in a run-down house in north carolina castrating themselves for the hell of it.

There was a video of a guy cutting his penis off and then taking his nuts out in another forum. I was unable to watch it past the part where he starts cutting.

That you would even watch that, let alone be on the forum...

 

[Number1]

Originally posted by: RapidSnail

Originally posted by: Number1

Originally posted by: xSauronx

Originally posted by: Trevelyan
In case anyone wants a serious explanation to this very strange verse, here it is:

Back in the time of the Israelites, self mutilation was a common form of pagan worship. There was a lot of this going on all around the Israelites, and God was making a point that they are not to participate. Obviously, it seems very strange that crushing your junk would be a form of pagan worship, but hey, stranger things have happened.

stranger things *have* happened

i seem to recall a story from last year (i probably caught in on fark) about some guys in a run-down house in north carolina castrating themselves for the hell of it.

There was a video of a guy cutting his penis off and then taking his nuts out in another forum. I was unable to watch it past the part where he starts cutting.

That you would even watch that, let alone be on the forum...

You sure seem to be interested in the subject since you are reading this thread!