NEW: List some movies you've watched recently. Theatre, rental, TV... and give a */10

[purbeast0]

-NGL that would have been an improvement.

Hell, end the whole thing with a musical number and all the dinos are dancing cabaret or something.

At least it would be unique and different.

You mean you didn't like how the mutant dinosaur was attracted to the flare and the one dude sacrificed himself to lead the mutant away so everyone else could be safe, and then when you see his flare again in the distance, after thinking he's dead, that the mutant dinosaur wasn't attracted to flares anymore for the entire trek the boat had to make to get back to him?

That was cinema gold and made complete sense!

 

[DigDog]

Hell, end the whole thing with a musical number and all the dinos are dancing cabaret or something.

At least it would be unique and different.

something like Springtime For Hitler - but with dinosaurs.

 

[Kaido]

And yes that may be a little spoiler but you will thank me without even knowing that I made you skip this trash.

There are a few movies like BTTF #1 that I like to watch every year & the OG Jurassic Park still holds up!

As that other review mentioned, they strayed from the formula...the original movie was an animal movie, not a monster movie. Yes, dinosaurs as animals are scary. GMO dinos are basically aliens lol:

 

[Kaido]

When he was staring down the little girl and not attacking her, I said to my wife "I'm waiting for the the little girl to take the pet dinosaur out of her backpack and show it to the big one and then he will let her go".

That is the kind of stupidity I expected to happen at that point lol.

And yes, those of you who haven't seen it yet - the little girl befriends a baby dinosaur and puts it in her backpack. And the dad is okay with her having a pet dinosaur from the wild to help with her speech thing where she goes mute due to trauma during the movie.

This is no lie lol.

Remix baby!

 

[Kaido]

Like from the very opening scene where they are in one of those clean rooms where everyone is in those outfits so there is no contamination, and the dude is casually eating a snickers bar with his helmet open, and drops the trash on the ground, and that starts the final destination stupid shit. Like wtf that makes absolutely NO SENSE.

I saw that spoiler on Tiktok & thought it was an A.I. joke lol

 

[Kaido]

Me too, until I saw him like this

I think that's the intended effect LOL

 

[igor_kavinski]

I think that's the intended effect LOL

View attachment 129178

Thankfully the other two actors don't look dumb: https://screenrant.com/lanterns-show-cast-characters-confirmed/

 

[purbeast0]

I almost recommend everyone hate watch Jurassic World Rebirth though. It's one of those movies that is so bad that you kind of have to watch it to realize just how bad it is.

 

[Kaido]

I almost recommend everyone hate watch Jurassic World Rebirth though. It's one of those movies that is so bad that you kind of have to watch it to realize just how bad it is.

We do that with "In the Name of the King" lol. Preface:

1. It's a Uwe Boll movie
2. It is literally free on Youtube
3. A stunning 4% on Rotten Tomatoes

Bonus spoilers:

1. Jason Statham's lead character name is Farmer
2. Chicken again?! (KAL-EL NO!)
3. Burt Reynolds reading cue cards

APPARENTLY THERE WAS A SEQUEL!!

 

[igor_kavinski]

Mission Unwatchable box office



There's hope yet. People are not as dumb as I thought they were.

 

[soulcougher73]

When he was staring down the little girl and not attacking her, I said to my wife "I'm waiting for the the little girl to take the pet dinosaur out of her backpack and show it to the big one and then he will let her go".

That is the kind of stupidity I expected to happen at that point lol.

And yes, those of you who haven't seen it yet - the little girl befriends a baby dinosaur and puts it in her backpack. And the dad is okay with her having a pet dinosaur from the wild to help with her speech thing where she goes mute due to trauma during the movie.

This is no lie lol.

This sounds like a great addition to my bad movie night group

 

[Kaido]

Thankfully the other two actors don't look dumb: https://screenrant.com/lanterns-show-cast-characters-confirmed/

Mister Terrific's face masking has been my favorite costume in YEARS!

 

[Dr. Detroit]

1. It's a Uwe Boll movie

I tend to avoid Uwe Boll flics - but Tunnel Rats fucked me up - that shit was not OK and was, all in all, pretty decent.

 

[Kaido]

I tend to avoid Uwe Boll flics

Genius tho

What is the German tax loophole of Uwe Boll?

In the early 2000s, Boll became known for using a generous German tax loophole which allowed investors to write off 100% of their investment. This “soft money” effectively replaced traditional box office incentives with a system that privileged production for production's sake, not market viability.

 

[Dr. Detroit]

Kilo Two Bravo - 6.5/10

2006 Afghanistan war movie about a group of British troops who get caught in a dry riverbed lined with mines.

This was known as the Kajaki Dam incident.

This was not an easy watch, first the British accents are thick so much of it was hard to understand and the slang used was often indiscernible. It's also quite slow and grinds through the torturous scenes when they are trapped in the wash. This was an unsettling film and was quite the white knuckle gruesome experience.

War sucks!

 

[DigDog]

i watched the rather-bad 1979 film

Meteor - https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0079550/reference/

5.1/10 on IMDb.

Starring, so to speak, Sean Connery, and co-starring Natalie Wood, Karl Malden, Martin Landau, Henry Fonda, and a bunch more.

Connery is a retired NASA big-brain guy. He is recalled because of the titular meteor, which is headed for earth, and will destroy it in 7 days. The only option to save the world is to use Hercules, a orbital platform with nuclear missilies, which Connery built for this very purpose, but which Landau has commandeered to be used as first strike against the evil USSR.
When Connery does the math, he sees that Hercules is not enough to blow up the meteor, in order to succeed he will also need Peter The Great, the equivalent orbital missile platform that the evil USSR also have built, pointing at the evil, imperialist US. *yawns in Cold War*

Connery talks the russians into admitting their platform exists and convinces them to also say theirs was built to defeat rogue comets. The missiles are launched and there is a brief interlude where the film becomes a disaster film - a smaller piece of the comet hits NYC early, potentially causing one of the missile launches to fail - but then the missiles are launched, the meteor exploads, and everyone drinks whisky or vodka or whatever and the world is a better place.


.. to be honest, it's not bad, but it's what we italians call polpettone, i.e. meatloaf - something that's kinda tough and chewy and difficult to get down. It's damn slow, overacted (Martin Landau must have been on coke because he's through the damn roof), the whole Cold War thing has been done to exhaustion .. it's boring. Tedious.
If you want to watch something very similar - in photography, sets, acting - but not boring, go for 1986's Lifeforce, which has big boobies AND a story worth watching (we don't speak of the ending).
It also fails because the action scenes - various disasters around the world - do not involve the characters of the story, nor the plot itself, aside from the ridiculous strike on the command center, which when it happens, feels like yet another attempt at stretching what is essentially a paper-thin story.

Would not recommend. 5.5/10 but there's better films in the same vote range that are more interesting. Quite literally a film that has absolutely nothing special anyone could miss.

 

[Kaido]