• We’re currently investigating an issue related to the forum theme and styling that is impacting page layout and visual formatting. The problem has been identified, and we are actively working on a resolution. There is no impact to user data or functionality, this is strictly a front-end display issue. We’ll post an update once the fix has been deployed. Thanks for your patience while we get this sorted.

neighbor situation: am I being unreasonable?

Page 2 - Seeking answers? Join the AnandTech community: where nearly half-a-million members share solutions and discuss the latest tech.
1. Anyone who calls the police first in this situation is a piece of shit. If I'm not big enough to ask them nicely first, I have no right to expect them to be big enough to turn it down. If they were playing gangsta rap or the like, that would be different, as you don't want attention from that type.

2. If you're unsure of yourself, get an assertive (but not asshole) friend to help you. I'd do it if I were your neighbor. When I'm unhappy, I stay cool and polite, but you'd better believe people pay attention.

3. Don't get all flowery or whiny. Don't try to convince them of the rightness of your cause. You want quiet because you want it. That's all they need to know.

4. Have a list of 2-3 acceptable compromises ready in your head. Make sure you're okay with the lowest one- don't be the guy who asks for something and then isn't happy with it later.

5. Know the noise ordinances before you go over there.

6. Dress to impress, and bring a gift.
 
Whenever the wind blows towards their house, have a good brush fire and toss in some plastic or rubber now and then to test their annoyance level.

angminas said:
1. Anyone who calls the police first in this situation is a piece of shit. If I'm not big enough to ask them nicely first, I have no right to expect them to be big enough to turn it down. If they were playing gangsta rap or the like, that would be different, as you don't want attention from that type.

2. If you're unsure of yourself, get an assertive (but not asshole) friend to help you. I'd do it if I were your neighbor. When I'm unhappy, I stay cool and polite, but you'd better believe people pay attention.

3. Don't get all flowery or whiny. Don't try to convince them of the rightness of your cause. You want quiet because you want it. That's all they need to know.

4. Have a list of 2-3 acceptable compromises ready in your head. Make sure you're okay with the lowest one- don't be the guy who asks for something and then isn't happy with it later.

5. Know the noise ordinances before you go over there.

6. Dress to impress, and bring a gift.
Click to expand...

I did that once over a piece of metal roof leaned against my fence that was bending it. Cool and polite only works if you get a "cool and polite" response. I learned that within the first 20 seconds of the conversation. After that I had half a garage full of crap against my fence and almost went to jail a couple of times for aggravated assault. But whatever, it's different for everyone and most people in general would oblige but like someone else mentioned, some people just flat out don't give a shit. I don't care to have the law talk to neighbors anymore, why should I hassle myself for someone that obviously doesn't care to begin with?
 
Last edited:
Also, if you can be sure you and your friend aren't going to do or say anything stupid, have your phone recording audio in your pocket. If the neighbor says something stupid or threatening, maybe you'll get some evidence.
 
JEDIYoda said:
That does not really matter.....most municipalities allow that sort of stuff from like 10 am til 10 pm!! He needs to deal with it...
Click to expand...

Not where I've lived. Assuming the noise is a nuisance the Police will deal with it. I've been the one making the noise in younger party years and the one reporting the noise. Again if its so loud that its irritating anywhere in your home it needs to be addressed. The Police will ask nicely at first then more aggressively as the calls come in.
 
MrColin said:
Go for the viral party effect with social networking, try to get at least 1000 people to their yard. Go to crowded bars and invite people to the neighbors awesome party. Tell women that celebrities are going to be there.

The police will eventually shut it down and you won't be the jerk who called them.
Click to expand...

Haha.
 
HeXen said:
Whenever the wind blows towards their house, have a good brush fire and toss in some plastic or rubber now and then to test their annoyance level.



I did that once over a piece of metal roof leaned against my fence that was bending it. Cool and polite only works if you get a "cool and polite" response. I learned that within the first 20 seconds of the conversation. After that I had half a garage full of crap against my fence and almost went to jail a couple of times for aggravated assault. But whatever, it's different for everyone and most people in general would oblige but like someone else mentioned, some people just flat out don't give a shit. I don't care to have the law talk to neighbors anymore, why should I hassle myself for someone that obviously doesn't care to begin with?
Click to expand...

This is Jersey to begin with right.

schmuckley said:
I would be knocking on their door right about now 🙂
Click to expand...

I would have been over there before now and possibly burning tires depending on wind conditions.

IronWing said:
Run your snowblower at 5am.
Click to expand...

:biggrin:

Seriously though go ask them to tone it down, after that I'd start calling the cops.
 
Make sure you are obeying all local ordinances and laws as well. Some people hold grudges if you call the cops on them and they start reporting people for where their cars are parked, leaving trash cans out too long after pickup and stuff like that.

Definitely try to deal with it in a friendly manner at first. It sucks to have a neighbor go to war with you, so better to kill them with kindness if possible.
 
Paladin3 said:
Definitely try to deal with it in a friendly manner at first. It sucks to have a neighbor go to war with you, so better to kill them with kindness if possible.
Click to expand...


This this THIS.

Back when my grandparents were still alive and living in Nutley New Jersey, they had a huge fight with the guy next door about him trimming things on both properties because he didn't like the way it looked from his. He would just throw the refuse in a pile on their lawn. Sometimes not in a pile, just anywhere. The guy had some issues, the only one nuttier than him was his spastic wife. So after asking him to kindly knock it off more than a few times, my grandpa just said fuckit and pitched a batch of pulled weeds and clipped limbs back into the neighbors yard, then called the police to formally complain and give them a heads up.

So began a feud that would last almost 20 years. I remember hearing about how one summer the neighbors sent over their nephew and his buddy to act like thugs and intimidate my grandparents. Problem was, the time they picked to stop by for their little shake down attempt was when my dad and 3 of his burly ass tree working crew stopped by the folks place for lunch. The nephew didn't take kindly to being told to leave without speaking his mind, so he decided to try and follow my grandma indoors while cussing her out. I don't really know the exact details of what unfolded next, but references to the incident made by various people over the years has me pretty convinced those neighbors got to see their nephew receive a vigorous asskicking. The neighbors continued to be pricks for the next couple years, until they moved away. Funny thing is so did my grandparents, but both they and the neighbors refused to sell their houses out of spite. I guess they saw it as capitulating somehow?

Regardless, both households were miserable for sometime over that drama. Avoid it if you can.

I'd give them a visit and politely let them know. I'd even remind them politely if they forget. But if they are dismissive douchebags and the request is ridiculed of scoffed at, I'd say aim some high watt speakers and maybe a few flood lights at them, then unleash some nauseating christian rock at 130dB and set to Repeat. That'll learn'em.
 
Paladin3 said:
Make sure you are obeying all local ordinances and laws as well. Some people hold grudges if you call the cops on them and they start reporting people for where their cars are parked, leaving trash cans out too long after pickup and stuff like that.

Definitely try to deal with it in a friendly manner at first. It sucks to have a neighbor go to war with you, so better to kill them with kindness if possible.
Click to expand...

Yea, this is probably the best route, first off the person(s) will at least have some respect in the fact that your trying to talk to them about the situation rather then call the cops right off the bat. I would tell them "it's not my thing to try and tell you how to run your life or to throw parties or anything else for that matter, it's just that I can't hear my TV set, talk normally on the phone or take a well-deserved weekend nap, would it be possible to keep the stereo down a bit?, thanks". If he blows you off then fine, wait till it's the loudest then call the cops, fuck it at that point, you tried to deal with it in a "neighborly" fashion but got squat for results..
 
It's happening right now 150 feet away from my sisters place. Started 3 hours ago. Neighbors have called and police have responded.
But they continued with their loud singing/playing music after they left. Damn Mexicans .... 😡
 
SKORPI0 said:
It's happening right now 150 feet away from my sisters place. Started 3 hours ago. Neighbors have called and police have responded.
But they continued with their loud singing/playing music after they left. Damn Mexicans .... 😡
Click to expand...

Organize with the neighbors - take turns calling; the 2nd to call waits until after the police have left, etc. The police give a friendly warning the first time, then leave. They don't get serious until they have to go back. (Been to places where the police showed up; if they don't have to return, I guess they assume that the people complied.)
 
we have a bunch of new 'garden homes' behind us. 3 homes to a typical lot.

a couple of them would leave their dogs yapping all the flipping time.. don't get me wrong, we have 2 dogs, but are very cognizant of their noise.

when we couldn't take it anymore, I just wrote a nice letter to them explaining our situation.. and that we'd contact the HOA if they didn't do anything to prevent the noise. next day it was fixed.

they've done a great job keeping on top of their dogs since then.
 
Yeah I agree with others in here. Most people who are being inconsiderate will not be responsive to a "friendly chat", but that is where you should start. Afterwards try to get neighbors involved and start a "call the police" war against them. Not much else you can do other than move away.
 
id do the anonymous note thing, then no one will know youre the dick, and you wont have to worry about conflict/retribution

or you could email them a link to this thread
 
Last edited:
Thebobo said:
Go over and talk to them.

In your underwear
Click to expand...

But be sure to not bathe or groom for a week beforehand, keep the same underwear too. Oh, and bring a shotgun!

Just be calm and polite and I'm sure that it will all work out fine. :biggrin:
 
ask them politely the first time then be louder than them when they start it again
 
Last edited:
Check your local noise ordinances before you do anything.

In many places, they can be as loud as they want until 10 PM and the cops won't even respond.


SKORPI0 said:
It's happening right now 150 feet away from my sisters place. Started 3 hours ago. Neighbors have called and police have responded.
But they continued with their loud singing/playing music after they left. Damn Mexicans .... 😡
Click to expand...

We had Mexican neighbors like that for a while in California...then the city changed the noise ordinance so that any time of day or night, if a person was willing to press charges and go to court, the cops would write a "disturbing the peace" citation.
Only took twice to get them to be more considerate. 🙄
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

TRENDING THREADS

Back
Top