Need some help with anger management

[imported_Phil]

I have a seriously short fuse and learned today that it almost got me fired when I shouted at my boss on the phone (and then called back immediately to grovel).

Any tips on dealing with this?

Lastly, this is a serious question. "Go to anger management" classes will earn you a smacked bottom.

 

[AStar617]

At least you realize you have a problem. That's always step #1.

My suggestion? When you notice you're headed down that road, close your eyes, inhale deep, swallow once, exhale, and reset. Give yourself a second to take stock of your entire situation. Doesn't sound like much but it has kept me from being featured in Dave Chappelle's "When Keepin' It Real Goes Wrong" skit a few times. :laugh:

 

gusfrabba

 

[Zysoclaplem]

Do you have a short fuse with everything that makes you mad, or just certain things?

 

[NikPreviousAcct]

Go to anger management.



The only way to deal with it is to properly vent it. There's nothing wrong with being angry. It's what you do with that anger and how you deal with it that presents the problem.

 

[Mo0o]

How about the "Shut your mouth when you're around people" option. And why can't you go to anger management classes

 

[imported_Phil]

Originally posted by: AStar617
At least you realize you have a problem. That's always step #1.

My suggestion? When you notice you're headed down that road, close your eyes, inhale deep, swallow once, exhale, and reset. Give yourself a second to take stock of your entire situation. Doesn't sound like much but it has kept me from being featured in Dave Chappelle's "When Keepin' It Real Goes Wrong" skit a few times. :laugh:

:laugh: Thanks

 

[apac]

IMO you need 2 things: A person or place to vent (ATOT works well) and something to do to take your mind off the subject after venting. I tend to blow off steam playing video games for a bit.

 

[imported_Phil]

Originally posted by: Zysoclaplem
Do you have a short fuse with everything that makes you mad, or just certain things?

It's pretty much "idiotic / inconsiderate people" that do it for me. Road rage is beginning to get worse, plus my intense dislike of the general sheep-like population- that does it for me.

 

[slightlyhuman]

i have a pretty bad temper also. i've never snapped but i fear if i do i won't be pretty=/ usually when i get mad i hit something, yes that's stupid of me but hell it helps imo. usually i go in the back yard and grab a bat and hit the ground or hit the ground, at least it won't hit back.

lately i've found out calling female friends and talking to them helps me clam down when i'm having a 'tude.

 

[imported_Phil]

Originally posted by: Nik
Go to anger management.



The only way to deal with it is to properly vent it. There's nothing wrong with being angry. It's what you do with that anger and how you deal with it that presents the problem.

I was thinking of a martial art, but I'm not in good enough shape to manage anything more than an hour of that.

 

[imported_Phil]

Originally posted by: Mo0o
How about the "Shut your mouth when you're around people" option.

Because I'm too angry

And why can't you go to anger management classes

Not only do they cost, I'd rather be at home with the girlfriend. Sacrifices might have to be made I suppose.

 

[EvilYoda]

Do the obvious thing...internalize it and start drinking!

Works wonders for me ;0

 

[imported_Phil]

Originally posted by: DP
i have a pretty bad temper also. i've never snapped but i fear if i do i won't be pretty=/ usually when i get mad i hit something, yes that's stupid of me but hell it helps imo. usually i go in the back yard and grab a bat and hit the ground or hit the ground, at least it won't hit back.

lately i've found out calling female friends and talking to them helps me clam down when i'm having a 'tude.

Although I restrain myself from hitting things/people, I found out today why you don't restrain yourself all the time

 

[daniel49]

ok i will play psychologist...
You never learned a constructive way of venting your anger as a child.
Some people are hitters some are yellers. some are sulkers.
You need to learn a new mechanism for dealing with your stress.
anger management would be a very good place to begin.
I know a guy whose first instict was always to use his fists since anger management its now his second instict so I think he is making progress

 

[imported_Phil]

Originally posted by: EvilYoda
Do the obvious thing...internalize it and start drinking!

Works wonders for me ;0

Way ahead of you, my friend. Check the avatar.

 

[NikPreviousAcct]

Originally posted by: Phil

Originally posted by: Nik
Go to anger management.



The only way to deal with it is to properly vent it. There's nothing wrong with being angry. It's what you do with that anger and how you deal with it that presents the problem.

I was thinking of a martial art, but I'm not in good enough shape to manage anything more than an hour of that.

Actually, physical activity is one of the BEST vents for anger, provided that you're not using it to harm people. Even if you're overweight, martial arts will still work for you. Have you ever considered aerobic kickboxing?

Not all martial arts schools start you off with a 4 hour warmup, then jogging 30 miles, THEN training. Most good schools take you right where you are and work from there.

 

[slightlyhuman]

Originally posted by: Phil

Originally posted by: DP
i have a pretty bad temper also. i've never snapped but i fear if i do i won't be pretty=/ usually when i get mad i hit something, yes that's stupid of me but hell it helps imo. usually i go in the back yard and grab a bat and hit the ground or hit the ground, at least it won't hit back.

lately i've found out calling female friends and talking to them helps me clam down when i'm having a 'tude.

Although I restrain myself from hitting things/people, I found out today why you don't restrain yourself all the time

:heart:

 

[NikPreviousAcct]

Originally posted by: Phil
Not only do they cost, I'd rather be at home with the girlfriend. Sacrifices might have to be made I suppose.

Angry sex can be fun :evil:

 

[imported_Phil]

Originally posted by: daniel49
ok i will play psychologist...
You never learned a constructive way of venting your anger as a child.
Some people are hitters some are yellers. some are sulkers.
You need to learn a new mechanism for dealing with your stress.
anger management would be a very good place to begin.
I know a guy whose first instict was always to use his fists since anger management its now his second instict so I think he is making progress

This is probably true. I was bullied a fair bit as a kid (until I had a decent growth spurt), and didn't physically fight back.

I'm beginning to wonder if this martial arts idea would actually be a worthwhile activity, more than I thought it might have been.

 

[imported_Phil]

Originally posted by: Nik

Originally posted by: Phil

Originally posted by: Nik
Go to anger management.



The only way to deal with it is to properly vent it. There's nothing wrong with being angry. It's what you do with that anger and how you deal with it that presents the problem.

I was thinking of a martial art, but I'm not in good enough shape to manage anything more than an hour of that.

Actually, physical activity is one of the BEST vents for anger, provided that you're not using it to harm people. Even if you're overweight, martial arts will still work for you. Have you ever considered aerobic kickboxing?

Not all martial arts schools start you off with a 4 hour warmup, then jogging 30 miles, THEN training. Most good schools take you right where you are and work from there.

Interesting. This looks more promising the more I think about it...

 

[thirdlegstump]

Get laid.

 

[Mo0o]

Originally posted by: Phil

Originally posted by: daniel49
ok i will play psychologist...
You never learned a constructive way of venting your anger as a child.
Some people are hitters some are yellers. some are sulkers.
You need to learn a new mechanism for dealing with your stress.
anger management would be a very good place to begin.
I know a guy whose first instict was always to use his fists since anger management its now his second instict so I think he is making progress

This is probably true. I was bullied a fair bit as a kid (until I had a decent growth spurt), and didn't physically fight back.

I'm beginning to wonder if this martial arts idea would actually be a worthwhile activity, more than I thought it might have been.

How about some basketball. Almost any kind of competitive sport can help w/ anger management issues

 

[imported_Phil]

Originally posted by: Mo0o

Originally posted by: Phil

Originally posted by: daniel49
ok i will play psychologist...
You never learned a constructive way of venting your anger as a child.
Some people are hitters some are yellers. some are sulkers.
You need to learn a new mechanism for dealing with your stress.
anger management would be a very good place to begin.
I know a guy whose first instict was always to use his fists since anger management its now his second instict so I think he is making progress

This is probably true. I was bullied a fair bit as a kid (until I had a decent growth spurt), and didn't physically fight back.

I'm beginning to wonder if this martial arts idea would actually be a worthwhile activity, more than I thought it might have been.

How about some basketball. Almost any kind of competitive sport can help w/ anger management issues

I'm white, therefore I can't jump

 

[Gravity]

You're not angry, you're hostile. I think you have some issue that you buried. Go to a counselor and see if you can get some work done on that. Perhaps something to do with your relationship with your father.

Chances are this will keep happening to you until you are unemployed.......again.

Get help now. Your company prolly has an employee assistance program or maybe even a toll free number.