Need advice concerning a nice girl I know.

[The Linuxator]

Originally posted by: mercanucaribe
She doesn't like you but you put her on the spot and she didn't want to hurt your feelings. Could you at least try not to be so creepy??

I put her on the spot ? So since when is being honest with a girl about my feelings something that isn't right ?
I told her how I feel, if she doesn't feel that way well down the road she would have told me something, I told her that all I want from her is an honest answer she doesn't have a BF right now and she likes me , me and her have lots of time to get to know each other who knows, even if she doesn't really dig me I have time to make her do so 😉.

 

[The Linuxator]

Originally posted by: memo
so did you get a hug or what?

The hug should be today, since it's the last day at work 😉

 

[BD2003]

Originally posted by: The Linuxator
Now where is BD when you really need his comments ?

I'm right here. Im going to have to say that after all of that....I agree with LanceM. That sounded hella creepy. It sounds all so proper and formal that I almost want to call shens on it. But Ill give the benefit of the doubt.

First, I must allow myself the personal indulgence of saying "I TOLD YOU SO". 😀

On the positive side, from what you described, it sounds like she likes you.

On the negative side, that came across as creepy to me. Exactly like I said before, you do NOT have a relationship with the girl, and cornering her with a "we have to talk" conversation is CREEPY. And I just simply dont buy the "I dont have time for a BF" stuff. Unless you never have time to take a piss, you have time for a BF. When you like someone like that, you find time.

I hate to be the guy to say it, but it is sounding to me like you just bought yourself a one way ticket to the friend zone. Its not non-refundable, but as of right now, youve got a seat reserved.

She : Absolutely, you are a very bright guy, you are fun, you respect me, and you obviously are very forgiving. I did mention it to you that right now I have two Jobs and I am going to school so I really don't have that much time for BF or anything like that.
But I will be hanging out with you often, we should for sure get to know each other better, you are fun, you are sincere, you have told me things that I know 90 % of the guys would just hide from me, trying to make themselves look more confident, while they really don't look like that really.

That sounds completely canned and scripted, but Ill assume you just typed it the best you remembered it and it came out robotic. Either way, thats what a girl says to the nice guy that they want to be friends with. "Oh, youre so great, I wish I could find a guy with you." Meanwhile, the guy they are dating is the guy that actually asked them out and took what they wanted instead of just blowing smoke up their sweet, luscious ass.

You put her on the spot and layed it on thick...ANY girl would act the same. Of course she was flattered. But flattery will get you nothing but a hug. No where in her conversation did she actually say she wanted to date you. If anything, her saying she didnt have time for a BF tells me she DOESNT want to date you. Again, I repeat, You do NOT say that to someone you want to date!

Which of course comes back again to the simple thing that you have still not fully grasped. You are still testing the waters, when instead you have to jump in. Everything is telling you its nice and warm and clean, but youre still running diagnostics tests and handing it off to asisstants to analyze and write a 10 page report on.

Where are you going that you cant just say plain and simple "You should come out to dinner tonight 😛", instead of stuffing her in a box and pouring your bleeding heart out all over her?

 

[Pepsi90919]

could everyone ITT please stop making analogies to computer problems in their posts dealing with women.

thanks

 

[The Linuxator]

Originally posted by: BD2003

Originally posted by: The Linuxator
Now where is BD when you really need his comments ?

I'm right here. Im going to have to say that after all of that....I agree with LanceM. That sounded hella creepy. It sounds all so proper and formal that I almost want to call shens on it. But Ill give the benefit of the doubt.

First, I must allow myself the personal indulgence of saying "I TOLD YOU SO". 😀

On the positive side, from what you described, it sounds like she likes you.

On the negative side, that came across as creepy to me. Exactly like I said before, you do NOT have a relationship with the girl, and cornering her with a "we have to talk" conversation is CREEPY. And I just simply dont buy the "I dont have time for a BF" stuff. Unless you never have time to take a piss, you have time for a BF. When you like someone like that, you find time.

I hate to be the guy to say it, but it is sounding to me like you just bought yourself a one way ticket to the friend zone. Its not non-refundable, but as of right now, youve got a seat reserved.

She : Absolutely, you are a very bright guy, you are fun, you respect me, and you obviously are very forgiving. I did mention it to you that right now I have two Jobs and I am going to school so I really don't have that much time for BF or anything like that.
But I will be hanging out with you often, we should for sure get to know each other better, you are fun, you are sincere, you have told me things that I know 90 % of the guys would just hide from me, trying to make themselves look more confident, while they really don't look like that really.

That sounds completely canned and scripted, but Ill assume you just typed it the best you remembered it and it came out robotic. Either way, thats what a girl says to the nice guy that they want to be friends with. "Oh, youre so great, I wish I could find a guy with you." Meanwhile, the guy they are dating is the guy that actually asked them out and took what they wanted instead of just blowing smoke up their sweet, luscious ass.

You put her on the spot and layed it on thick...ANY girl would act the same. Of course she was flattered. But flattery will get you nothing but a hug. No where in her conversation did she actually say she wanted to date you. If anything, her saying she didnt have time for a BF tells me she DOESNT want to date you. Again, I repeat, You do NOT say that to someone you want to date!

Which of course comes back again to the simple thing that you have still not fully grasped. You are still testing the waters, when instead you have to jump in. Everything is telling you its nice and warm and clean, but youre still running diagnostics tests and handing it off to asisstants to analyze and write a 10 page report on.

Where are you going that you cant just say plain and simple "You should come out to dinner tonight 😛", instead of stuffing her in a box and pouring your bleeding heart out all over her?

She seemed freaked about me wanting to talk to her after work at the begining, so I didn't want her to feel more pressured than she already was.
I had to talk to her the way I talked to her yesterday because I was running out of time and yesterday was my last chance t oget my feelings out there, I had no choice, trust me I didn't want to push things so fast but I had to presume that yesterday is going to be the last time I will be able to have her alone for a while.

Concerning the BF comment, look she works 45-50 hours a week and she goes to college too, I have 19 credit hours of core major courses next semester (Double majoring in CSE and EE), you know I want to have a relation with her , right ? But I said too that I am not looking for a seriouse relation ATM to her, does that mean that I am not intrested in her ? I don't think so, as I told you before all what I told her is that , I want to get to know her better and from now till we develop a nice solid base of data about each other ,then we can't really go into a healthy relationship anyways without that, I like it about her that she took things in a cool slow way and she was honest about not looking for a relationship ATM, I wouldn't blame her she odesn't have much time on her hand.

From my view point I am aiming at a real relationship post graduation, and since she is the only one that have got my attention till now, I will keep my eyes on her till graduation, then I would see if the atmosphere, if it's right for me and her to either be friends only or take it a step further.

Do you have a better picture now of what I have in my plans BD ?

 

[BD2003]

Originally posted by: The Linuxator

Originally posted by: BD2003

Originally posted by: The Linuxator
Now where is BD when you really need his comments ?

I'm right here. Im going to have to say that after all of that....I agree with LanceM. That sounded hella creepy. It sounds all so proper and formal that I almost want to call shens on it. But Ill give the benefit of the doubt.

First, I must allow myself the personal indulgence of saying "I TOLD YOU SO". 😀

On the positive side, from what you described, it sounds like she likes you.

On the negative side, that came across as creepy to me. Exactly like I said before, you do NOT have a relationship with the girl, and cornering her with a "we have to talk" conversation is CREEPY. And I just simply dont buy the "I dont have time for a BF" stuff. Unless you never have time to take a piss, you have time for a BF. When you like someone like that, you find time.

I hate to be the guy to say it, but it is sounding to me like you just bought yourself a one way ticket to the friend zone. Its not non-refundable, but as of right now, youve got a seat reserved.

She : Absolutely, you are a very bright guy, you are fun, you respect me, and you obviously are very forgiving. I did mention it to you that right now I have two Jobs and I am going to school so I really don't have that much time for BF or anything like that.
But I will be hanging out with you often, we should for sure get to know each other better, you are fun, you are sincere, you have told me things that I know 90 % of the guys would just hide from me, trying to make themselves look more confident, while they really don't look like that really.

That sounds completely canned and scripted, but Ill assume you just typed it the best you remembered it and it came out robotic. Either way, thats what a girl says to the nice guy that they want to be friends with. "Oh, youre so great, I wish I could find a guy with you." Meanwhile, the guy they are dating is the guy that actually asked them out and took what they wanted instead of just blowing smoke up their sweet, luscious ass.

You put her on the spot and layed it on thick...ANY girl would act the same. Of course she was flattered. But flattery will get you nothing but a hug. No where in her conversation did she actually say she wanted to date you. If anything, her saying she didnt have time for a BF tells me she DOESNT want to date you. Again, I repeat, You do NOT say that to someone you want to date!

Which of course comes back again to the simple thing that you have still not fully grasped. You are still testing the waters, when instead you have to jump in. Everything is telling you its nice and warm and clean, but youre still running diagnostics tests and handing it off to asisstants to analyze and write a 10 page report on.

Where are you going that you cant just say plain and simple "You should come out to dinner tonight 😛", instead of stuffing her in a box and pouring your bleeding heart out all over her?

She seemed freaked about me wanting to talk to her after work at the begining, so I didn't want her to feel more pressured than she already was.
I had to talk to her the way I talked to her yesterday because I was running out of time and yesterday was my last chance t oget my feelings out there, I had no choice, trust me I didn't want to push things so fast but I had to presume that yesterday is going to be the last time I will be able to have her alone for a while.

Concerning the BF comment, look she works 45-50 hours a week and she goes to college too, I have 19 credit hours of core major courses next semester (Double majoring in CSE and EE), you know I want to have a relation with her , right ? But I said too that I am not looking for a seriouse relation ATM to her, does that mean that I am not intrested in her ? I don't think so, as I told you before all what I told her is that , I want to get to know her better and from now till we develop a nice solid base of data about each other ,then we can't really go into a healthy relationship anyways without that, I like it about her that she took things in a cool slow way and she was honest about not looking for a relationship ATM, I wouldn't blame her she odesn't have much time on her hand.

From my view point I am aiming at a real relationship post graduation, and since she is the only one that have got my attention till now, I will keep my eyes on her till graduation, then I would see if the atmosphere, if it's right for me and her to either be friends only or take it a step further.

Do you have a better picture now of what I have in my plans BD ?

Oh, I have a picture of your plans alright. But what youre trying to accomplish is basically against all odds. You are in effect trying to stake a flag on the girl, assuming you can reach some sort of "agreement" that you guys dig each other but dont have time for each other so neither one of you will go out with the other one until youre both ready.

And thats just not gonna fly back in reality. Girls (secure ones at least) DO NOT LOOK FOR RELATIONSHIPS. Relationships come to them. In general, they sit around waiting for someone to come along who has that combination of manliness, sensitivity and good looks that they just cant resist. Pretty much the only exception to this is a girl that is both attractive and secure, and knows that she can get one whenever she wants one. And even then, she'll crack if the right guy comes along.

Anyway, the point is, if you are waiting for her, chances are she is not going to be around. Even if she is around, by that point she may have become so comfortable with you as a friend that she is not going to want to go out with you.

Besides, a relationship is what you make of it. For years, me and my gf lived an hour or two away while she was away at college, and we basically see each other during the weekends and talking on the phone/IMs while she's away. Both of us work and go to school. And there is PLENTY of time. Even when you only get to see her for two days a week and talk to her an hour a day, while it may not be your ideal, is still a decent amount of time. Besides, youre sending the message that she isnt worth your time right now.

But of course do whatever you want man, I'm just keeping it real for you. For some reason you think youre on the love boat now, but you are totally on the runaway train to friend zone. You should have already realized by now that the situation is what it is, and not what you want it to be.

1) Find the time, even if its only a bit, and make it happen. If she likes you, and you like her, you WILL have plenty of time.
2) Wait, and take your chances (which are not very good I have to say) that she will still be single and still interested in you by the time you finally get around to considering her worth your time.

The choice is yours.

 

[The Linuxator]

....
But of course do whatever you want man, I'm just keeping it real for you. For some reason you think youre on the love boat now, but you are totally on the runaway train to friend zone. You should have already realized by now that the situation is what it is, and not what you want it to be.

1) Find the time, even if its only a bit, and make it happen. If she likes you, and you like her, you WILL have plenty of time.
2) Wait, and take your chances (which are not very good I have to say) that she will still be single and still interested in you by the time you finally get around to considering her worth your time.

The choice is yours.

Look I want to stay in continous contact with her, building up that information database about :
- What she likes / doesn't like.
- Does my persona fit her's ?
- Going out alot with her and see if it's really a pleasure for her and me to always be around each other ?
- See if her plans for the future (i.e Family, Marriage , kids , settling down...etc) would fit mine right or not.

All I will be trying to do over this period of time is explore her plans and ideas.
I want to know if her plans for "no BF ATM" thing is just a way for her to illude me the crazy Romeo, or it's her plan to actually take it slow and check the pulse of each guy that tries to get closer to her.

I am proud to say that when she told me that she has no time for BF because of her circumstances , I didn't jump up and try to change her ships heading or something, I told her that me and her are in the same boat and she is not to expect any pressuring from my side, but she has to expect that I am still intrested about knowing more about her personality and at the same time she would know more of mine and further down the road either something evolves from this or not.

 

[BD2003]

Originally posted by: The Linuxator

....
But of course do whatever you want man, I'm just keeping it real for you. For some reason you think youre on the love boat now, but you are totally on the runaway train to friend zone. You should have already realized by now that the situation is what it is, and not what you want it to be.

1) Find the time, even if its only a bit, and make it happen. If she likes you, and you like her, you WILL have plenty of time.
2) Wait, and take your chances (which are not very good I have to say) that she will still be single and still interested in you by the time you finally get around to considering her worth your time.

The choice is yours.

Look I want to stay in continous contact with her, building up that information database about :
- What she likes / doesn't like.
- Does my persona fit her's ?
- Going out alot with her and see if it's really a pleasure for her and me to always be around each other ?
- See if her plans for the future (i.e Family, Marriage , kids , settling down...etc) would fit mine right or not.

All I will be trying to do over this period of time is explore her plans and ideas.
I want to know if her plans for "no BF ATM" thing is just a way for her to illude me the crazy Romeo, or it's her plan to actually take it slow and check the pulse of each guy that tries to get closer to her.

I am proud to say that when she told me that she has no time for BF because of her circumstances , I didn't jump up and try to change her ships heading or something, I told her that me and her are in the same boat and she is not to expect any pressuring from my side, but she has to expect that I am still intrested about knowing more about her personality and at the same time she would know more of mine and further down the road either something evolves from this or not.

Ill be more explicit about it when I get back, but THAT IS WHAT DATING IS FOR!

 

[BD2003]

Being more specific, every single thing (EVERY SINGLE ONE) is the thing that *normal* people do through dating.

You want to find out:
- What she likes / doesn't like. (DATE HER)
- Does my persona fit her's ? (DATE HER)
- Going out alot with her and see if it's really a pleasure for her and me to always be around each other ? (DATE HER!)
- See if her plans for the future (i.e Family, Marriage , kids , settling down...etc) would fit mine right or not. (DATE HER FOR MONTHS!)

You want to explore her plans and ideas? DATE HER!

You want to know if this no BF ATM is a way for her to elude you? IT IS. SHE IS WAITING FOR YOU TO ASK HER OUT FOR REAL.

If she wants to check the pulse of guys, she will GO OUT WITH THEM.

Right now you are giving her mixed signals, and nothing kills a budding courtship like mixed signals, as you already should be very well aware of given what has happened in the past couple of days.

Right now the signals you are sending are :

• I like you but I dont want to take a chance on you yet.
  I am so insecure that I am not willing to take a chance that I might get even slightly rejected.
  I'm willing to put everything in the world before you.
  You're cool, but not cool enough.
  I have no balls.
  I'm creepy.

What signal does she WANT to hear? I want one thing, and that one thing is you, and I KNOW IT.

If you want to know whether something evolves from this further down the road....DATE HER!

Have I not been dead on so far? You pussyfooted around. Me and others convinced you to whip out your balls and call her, and she said yes. Then sh*t happened. You, among many many other people, said she DEFINITELY didnt like you and that all was lost and it was time to move on. You were freaking out about the mixed signals. Throughout all of that, a small minority of people, myself included, said not to worry about it, as all is not lost yet. You were overanalyzing the situation and she very well could have been sick. And that was exactly the case.

You should have figured out by now that I have been doing nothing but trying to help you. Ill admit that this thread has been a great source of entertainment for me for the past week, but I still want to see you get the girl. You are digging your own grave. However you make your bed, you have to lie in it, and not me nor anyone else can help you once she moves on for real.

 

[The Linuxator]

Originally posted by: BD2003
Being more specific, every single thing (EVERY SINGLE ONE) is the thing that *normal* people do through dating.

You want to find out:
- What she likes / doesn't like. (DATE HER)
- Does my persona fit her's ? (DATE HER)
- Going out alot with her and see if it's really a pleasure for her and me to always be around each other ? (DATE HER!)
- See if her plans for the future (i.e Family, Marriage , kids , settling down...etc) would fit mine right or not. (DATE HER FOR MONTHS!)

You want to explore her plans and ideas? DATE HER!

You want to know if this no BF ATM is a way for her to elude you? IT IS. SHE IS WAITING FOR YOU TO ASK HER OUT FOR REAL.

If she wants to check the pulse of guys, she will GO OUT WITH THEM.

Right now you are giving her mixed signals, and nothing kills a budding courtship like mixed signals, as you already should be very well aware of given what has happened in the past couple of days.

If you want to know whether something evolves from this further down the road....DATE HER!

Have I not been dead on so far? You pussyfooted around. Me and others convinced you to whip out your balls and call her, and she said yes. Then sh*t happened. You, among many many other people, said she DEFINITELY didnt like you and that all was lost and it was time to move on. You were freaking out about the mixed signals. Throughout all of that, a small minority of people, myself included, said not to worry about it, as all is not lost yet. You were overanalyzing the situation and she very well could have been sick. And that was exactly the case.

You should have figured out by now that I have been doing nothing but trying to help you. Ill admit that this thread has been a great source of entertainment for me for the past week, but I still want to see you get the girl. You are digging your own grave. However you make your bed, you have to lie in it, and not me nor anyone else can help you once she moves on for real.

I am going to see her at work today, and it will be my last day at work, she will
be there, I will chat her a up a bit at work and then see if Friday night is a good idea 😀
Don't worry about it, I am asking her to go out on a date this Friday so wink wink.

 

[BD2003]

Originally posted by: The Linuxator

Originally posted by: BD2003
Being more specific, every single thing (EVERY SINGLE ONE) is the thing that *normal* people do through dating.

You want to find out:
- What she likes / doesn't like. (DATE HER)
- Does my persona fit her's ? (DATE HER)
- Going out alot with her and see if it's really a pleasure for her and me to always be around each other ? (DATE HER!)
- See if her plans for the future (i.e Family, Marriage , kids , settling down...etc) would fit mine right or not. (DATE HER FOR MONTHS!)

You want to explore her plans and ideas? DATE HER!

You want to know if this no BF ATM is a way for her to elude you? IT IS. SHE IS WAITING FOR YOU TO ASK HER OUT FOR REAL.

If she wants to check the pulse of guys, she will GO OUT WITH THEM.

Right now you are giving her mixed signals, and nothing kills a budding courtship like mixed signals, as you already should be very well aware of given what has happened in the past couple of days.

If you want to know whether something evolves from this further down the road....DATE HER!

Have I not been dead on so far? You pussyfooted around. Me and others convinced you to whip out your balls and call her, and she said yes. Then sh*t happened. You, among many many other people, said she DEFINITELY didnt like you and that all was lost and it was time to move on. You were freaking out about the mixed signals. Throughout all of that, a small minority of people, myself included, said not to worry about it, as all is not lost yet. You were overanalyzing the situation and she very well could have been sick. And that was exactly the case.

You should have figured out by now that I have been doing nothing but trying to help you. Ill admit that this thread has been a great source of entertainment for me for the past week, but I still want to see you get the girl. You are digging your own grave. However you make your bed, you have to lie in it, and not me nor anyone else can help you once she moves on for real.

Don't worry about it, I am asking her to go out on a date this Friday so wink wink.

Then do it right now. You want to go out tomorrow night, you have to ask her TONIGHT. There is no better time than now. Go.

 

[The Linuxator]

Originally posted by: BD2003

Originally posted by: The Linuxator

Originally posted by: BD2003
Being more specific, every single thing (EVERY SINGLE ONE) is the thing that *normal* people do through dating.

You want to find out:
- What she likes / doesn't like. (DATE HER)
- Does my persona fit her's ? (DATE HER)
- Going out alot with her and see if it's really a pleasure for her and me to always be around each other ? (DATE HER!)
- See if her plans for the future (i.e Family, Marriage , kids , settling down...etc) would fit mine right or not. (DATE HER FOR MONTHS!)

You want to explore her plans and ideas? DATE HER!

You want to know if this no BF ATM is a way for her to elude you? IT IS. SHE IS WAITING FOR YOU TO ASK HER OUT FOR REAL.

If she wants to check the pulse of guys, she will GO OUT WITH THEM.

Right now you are giving her mixed signals, and nothing kills a budding courtship like mixed signals, as you already should be very well aware of given what has happened in the past couple of days.

If you want to know whether something evolves from this further down the road....DATE HER!

Have I not been dead on so far? You pussyfooted around. Me and others convinced you to whip out your balls and call her, and she said yes. Then sh*t happened. You, among many many other people, said she DEFINITELY didnt like you and that all was lost and it was time to move on. You were freaking out about the mixed signals. Throughout all of that, a small minority of people, myself included, said not to worry about it, as all is not lost yet. You were overanalyzing the situation and she very well could have been sick. And that was exactly the case.

You should have figured out by now that I have been doing nothing but trying to help you. Ill admit that this thread has been a great source of entertainment for me for the past week, but I still want to see you get the girl. You are digging your own grave. However you make your bed, you have to lie in it, and not me nor anyone else can help you once she moves on for real.

Don't worry about it, I am asking her to go out on a date this Friday so wink wink.

Then do it right now. You want to go out tomorrow night, you have to ask her TONIGHT. There is no better time than now. Go.

Now is too pushy, 5 hours later I will see her at work, I will tell her then, that's what I really meant.

 

[BD2003]

Call her now so you can have her giggling and smiling at you later and work. Trust me.

 

[pontifex]

Originally posted by: BD2003

Originally posted by: The Linuxator

Originally posted by: BD2003

Originally posted by: The Linuxator
Now where is BD when you really need his comments ?

I'm right here. Im going to have to say that after all of that....I agree with LanceM. That sounded hella creepy. It sounds all so proper and formal that I almost want to call shens on it. But Ill give the benefit of the doubt.

First, I must allow myself the personal indulgence of saying "I TOLD YOU SO". 😀

On the positive side, from what you described, it sounds like she likes you.

On the negative side, that came across as creepy to me. Exactly like I said before, you do NOT have a relationship with the girl, and cornering her with a "we have to talk" conversation is CREEPY. And I just simply dont buy the "I dont have time for a BF" stuff. Unless you never have time to take a piss, you have time for a BF. When you like someone like that, you find time.

I hate to be the guy to say it, but it is sounding to me like you just bought yourself a one way ticket to the friend zone. Its not non-refundable, but as of right now, youve got a seat reserved.

She : Absolutely, you are a very bright guy, you are fun, you respect me, and you obviously are very forgiving. I did mention it to you that right now I have two Jobs and I am going to school so I really don't have that much time for BF or anything like that.
But I will be hanging out with you often, we should for sure get to know each other better, you are fun, you are sincere, you have told me things that I know 90 % of the guys would just hide from me, trying to make themselves look more confident, while they really don't look like that really.

That sounds completely canned and scripted, but Ill assume you just typed it the best you remembered it and it came out robotic. Either way, thats what a girl says to the nice guy that they want to be friends with. "Oh, youre so great, I wish I could find a guy with you." Meanwhile, the guy they are dating is the guy that actually asked them out and took what they wanted instead of just blowing smoke up their sweet, luscious ass.

You put her on the spot and layed it on thick...ANY girl would act the same. Of course she was flattered. But flattery will get you nothing but a hug. No where in her conversation did she actually say she wanted to date you. If anything, her saying she didnt have time for a BF tells me she DOESNT want to date you. Again, I repeat, You do NOT say that to someone you want to date!

Which of course comes back again to the simple thing that you have still not fully grasped. You are still testing the waters, when instead you have to jump in. Everything is telling you its nice and warm and clean, but youre still running diagnostics tests and handing it off to asisstants to analyze and write a 10 page report on.

Where are you going that you cant just say plain and simple "You should come out to dinner tonight 😛", instead of stuffing her in a box and pouring your bleeding heart out all over her?

She seemed freaked about me wanting to talk to her after work at the begining, so I didn't want her to feel more pressured than she already was.
I had to talk to her the way I talked to her yesterday because I was running out of time and yesterday was my last chance t oget my feelings out there, I had no choice, trust me I didn't want to push things so fast but I had to presume that yesterday is going to be the last time I will be able to have her alone for a while.

Concerning the BF comment, look she works 45-50 hours a week and she goes to college too, I have 19 credit hours of core major courses next semester (Double majoring in CSE and EE), you know I want to have a relation with her , right ? But I said too that I am not looking for a seriouse relation ATM to her, does that mean that I am not intrested in her ? I don't think so, as I told you before all what I told her is that , I want to get to know her better and from now till we develop a nice solid base of data about each other ,then we can't really go into a healthy relationship anyways without that, I like it about her that she took things in a cool slow way and she was honest about not looking for a relationship ATM, I wouldn't blame her she odesn't have much time on her hand.

From my view point I am aiming at a real relationship post graduation, and since she is the only one that have got my attention till now, I will keep my eyes on her till graduation, then I would see if the atmosphere, if it's right for me and her to either be friends only or take it a step further.

Do you have a better picture now of what I have in my plans BD ?

Oh, I have a picture of your plans alright. But what youre trying to accomplish is basically against all odds. You are in effect trying to stake a flag on the girl, assuming you can reach some sort of "agreement" that you guys dig each other but dont have time for each other so neither one of you will go out with the other one until youre both ready.

And thats just not gonna fly back in reality. Girls (secure ones at least) DO NOT LOOK FOR RELATIONSHIPS. Relationships come to them. In general, they sit around waiting for someone to come along who has that combination of manliness, sensitivity and good looks that they just cant resist. Pretty much the only exception to this is a girl that is both attractive and secure, and knows that she can get one whenever she wants one. And even then, she'll crack if the right guy comes along.

Anyway, the point is, if you are waiting for her, chances are she is not going to be around. Even if she is around, by that point she may have become so comfortable with you as a friend that she is not going to want to go out with you.

Besides, a relationship is what you make of it. For years, me and my gf lived an hour or two away while she was away at college, and we basically see each other during the weekends and talking on the phone/IMs while she's away. Both of us work and go to school. And there is PLENTY of time. Even when you only get to see her for two days a week and talk to her an hour a day, while it may not be your ideal, is still a decent amount of time. Besides, youre sending the message that she isnt worth your time right now.

But of course do whatever you want man, I'm just keeping it real for you. For some reason you think youre on the love boat now, but you are totally on the runaway train to friend zone. You should have already realized by now that the situation is what it is, and not what you want it to be.

1) Find the time, even if its only a bit, and make it happen. If she likes you, and you like her, you WILL have plenty of time.
2) Wait, and take your chances (which are not very good I have to say) that she will still be single and still interested in you by the time you finally get around to considering her worth your time.

The choice is yours.

i so do not understand your theories.
this is what i imagine bd2003 doing to a girl he likes:

bd2003: me like you *smacks her over the head with a club and then drags her back to his cave.*

or

bd2003: you're going out with me tonight
girl: oh? i am? who the hell are you?
bd2003: the studmuffin you've been looking for all your life!
girl: get lost *sprays mace in bd2003's eyes*

you act like any girl out there is for the taking no matter what and that they are just objects for you to do with whatever you please.

 

[mercanucaribe]

She isn't looking for a boyfriend.

 

[BD2003]

i so do not understand your theories.
this is what i imagine bd2003 doing to a girl he likes:

bd2003: me like you *smacks her over the head with a club and then drags her back to his cave.*

or

bd2003: you're going out with me tonight
girl: oh? i am? who the hell are you?
bd2003: the studmuffin you've been looking for all your life!
girl: get lost *sprays mace in bd2003's eyes*

you act like any girl out there is for the taking no matter what and that they are just objects for you to do with whatever you please.

You of all people do not know wtf they are talking about.

 

[pontifex]

Originally posted by: BD2003

i so do not understand your theories.
this is what i imagine bd2003 doing to a girl he likes:

bd2003: me like you *smacks her over the head with a club and then drags her back to his cave.*

or

bd2003: you're going out with me tonight
girl: oh? i am? who the hell are you?
bd2003: the studmuffin you've been looking for all your life!
girl: get lost *sprays mace in bd2003's eyes*

you act like any girl out there is for the taking no matter what and that they are just objects for you to do with whatever you please.

You of all people do not know wtf they are talking about.

and you do right? thats what i get from your posts.

 

[The Linuxator]

Originally posted by: BD2003

i so do not understand your theories.
this is what i imagine bd2003 doing to a girl he likes:

bd2003: me like you *smacks her over the head with a club and then drags her back to his cave.*

or

bd2003: you're going out with me tonight
girl: oh? i am? who the hell are you?
bd2003: the studmuffin you've been looking for all your life!
girl: get lost *sprays mace in bd2003's eyes*

you act like any girl out there is for the taking no matter what and that they are just objects for you to do with whatever you please.

You of all people do not know wtf they are talking about.

I have to admit though BD sometimes you make perfect sense and sometimes your style looks just way too pushy , I don't know.

Oh and LMAO @ "
bd2003: me like you *smacks her over the head with a club and then drags her back to his cave.*" :laugh:

 

[BD2003]

Originally posted by: pontifex

Originally posted by: BD2003

i so do not understand your theories.
this is what i imagine bd2003 doing to a girl he likes:

bd2003: me like you *smacks her over the head with a club and then drags her back to his cave.*

or

bd2003: you're going out with me tonight
girl: oh? i am? who the hell are you?
bd2003: the studmuffin you've been looking for all your life!
girl: get lost *sprays mace in bd2003's eyes*

you act like any girl out there is for the taking no matter what and that they are just objects for you to do with whatever you please.

You of all people do not know wtf they are talking about.

and you do right? thats what i get from your posts.

Yes, I do. Ill explain why you have no clue after I get off the phone with my gf.

 

[pontifex]

Originally posted by: BD2003

Originally posted by: pontifex

Originally posted by: BD2003

i so do not understand your theories.
this is what i imagine bd2003 doing to a girl he likes:

bd2003: me like you *smacks her over the head with a club and then drags her back to his cave.*

or

bd2003: you're going out with me tonight
girl: oh? i am? who the hell are you?
bd2003: the studmuffin you've been looking for all your life!
girl: get lost *sprays mace in bd2003's eyes*

you act like any girl out there is for the taking no matter what and that they are just objects for you to do with whatever you please.

You of all people do not know wtf they are talking about.

and you do right? thats what i get from your posts.

Yes, I do. Ill explain why you have no clue after I get off the phone with my gf.

lol...sure, you do that. and i'll read it as soon as i get done washing my Ferrari Enzo.

 

[The Linuxator]

Originally posted by: pontifex

Originally posted by: BD2003

Originally posted by: pontifex

Originally posted by: BD2003

i so do not understand your theories.
this is what i imagine bd2003 doing to a girl he likes:

bd2003: me like you *smacks her over the head with a club and then drags her back to his cave.*

or

bd2003: you're going out with me tonight
girl: oh? i am? who the hell are you?
bd2003: the studmuffin you've been looking for all your life!
girl: get lost *sprays mace in bd2003's eyes*

you act like any girl out there is for the taking no matter what and that they are just objects for you to do with whatever you please.

You of all people do not know wtf they are talking about.

and you do right? thats what i get from your posts.

Yes, I do. Ill explain why you have no clue after I get off the phone with my gf.

lol...sure, you do that. and i'll read it as soon as i get done washing my Ferrari Enzo.

Hold on I am a bit busy dropping an M5 V10 engine in My 850CSi will be right up in 5 minutes 😀

BWAHAHAAH!!

 

[BD2003]

You see, I've got nothing to prove to you all. Whether or not you believe I have a GF or not, I could care less. Just because youre 25 and never been with a female doesnt mean that everyone else is relegated to that same pathetic state. Here on ATOT there is a severely disproportional amount of virgins, but that doesnt mean we all fall under that category.

Anyway, everyone can see that you are pathetic, and the only thing that can make you feel better about your state of affairs is trying to bring others down to your level. You can keep on dreaming about that as you can keep on dreaming about ever getting with a girl with your way of thinking.

You are a pussy, plain and simple. All I have ever advocated to linuxator is to not fall into the same trap you have. To be friendly, and to ask her out instead of sitting on the sidelines waiting for her to come to him. So far he's doing good, even though its like he's taking two steps forward and one step back. If all that can make you feel better is trying to diss me and act like I'm some kind of asshole who mistreats women, then by all means, keep on telling yourself that.

In the end, linuxator has a very good chance if he follows through with what he started, and all you've got for the forseeable future is your hand.

 

[pontifex]

Originally posted by: BD2003
You see, I've got nothing to prove to you all. Whether or not you believe I have a GF or not, I could care less. Just because youre 25 and never been with a female doesnt mean that everyone else is relegated to that same pathetic state. Here on ATOT there is a severely disproportional amount of virgins, but that doesnt mean we all fall under that category.

Anyway, everyone can see that you are pathetic, and the only thing that can make you feel better about your state of affairs is trying to bring others down to your level. You can keep on dreaming about that as you can keep on dreaming about ever getting with a girl with your way of thinking.

You are a pussy, plain and simple. All I have ever advocated to linuxator is to not fall into the same trap you have. To be friendly, and to ask her out instead of sitting on the sidelines waiting for her to come to him. So far he's doing good, even though its like he's taking two steps forward and one step back. If all that can make you feel better is trying to diss me and act like I'm some kind of asshole who mistreats women, then by all means, keep on telling yourself that.

In the end, linuxator has a very good chance if he follows through with what he started, and all you've got for the forseeable future is your hand.

wait, you bitch about me trying to "bring you down to my level" but its ok for you to do it to me?

where have i said i haven't ever been with a girl? where have i said that i just sit there and wait for them to come to me? if you bothered reading at all, you might have seen that. but all you can do is bash people for not following your cave man tactics on getting a girl.

also, how can you say in one post that he will never be with this girl then in another say that he has a very good chance? someone seems to forget what he says

 

[BD2003]

Originally posted by: pontifex

Originally posted by: BD2003
You see, I've got nothing to prove to you all. Whether or not you believe I have a GF or not, I could care less. Just because youre 25 and never been with a female doesnt mean that everyone else is relegated to that same pathetic state. Here on ATOT there is a severely disproportional amount of virgins, but that doesnt mean we all fall under that category.

Anyway, everyone can see that you are pathetic, and the only thing that can make you feel better about your state of affairs is trying to bring others down to your level. You can keep on dreaming about that as you can keep on dreaming about ever getting with a girl with your way of thinking.

You are a pussy, plain and simple. All I have ever advocated to linuxator is to not fall into the same trap you have. To be friendly, and to ask her out instead of sitting on the sidelines waiting for her to come to him. So far he's doing good, even though its like he's taking two steps forward and one step back. If all that can make you feel better is trying to diss me and act like I'm some kind of asshole who mistreats women, then by all means, keep on telling yourself that.

In the end, linuxator has a very good chance if he follows through with what he started, and all you've got for the forseeable future is your hand.

wait, you bitch about me trying to "bring you down to my level" but its ok for you to do it to me?

where have i said i haven't ever been with a girl? where have i said that i just sit there and wait for them to come to me? if you bothered reading at all, you might have seen that. but all you can do is bash people for not following your cave man tactics on getting a girl.

I'm not bringing you down to my level. I'd have to bring you up.

i'm 25 and never been in a relationship with a girl. its tough and i'm totally lost when it comes to women because so few women have shown any interest in me. still no luck on my end with the women even after joining match.com. i've emailed a few but none have emailed me back. when sh!t like this happens i get depressed but somehow i get over it i guess or i just try not to thnik about it.

Is exactly where you said you never been with a girl.

i used to work with this one girl a few years ago that i was totally in love with. i did put her on a pedestal and now i realize that it was wrong. i would have done anything for that girl at the time. i think she was using the fact that i liked her in the end.

There, and various other posts including your very own YAGT weeping about some girl that never emailed you back is is where you've shown that you sit on the sidelines.

My "caveman" tactics of goading linuxator to call the damn girl instead of sitting and planning out conversations to make at work got him a date.

Ive said it before, and Ill say it again. You just don't get it. It only sounds like caveman tactics to you because its so foreign and opposed to your way of thinking. Which you have said yourself...you just dont get my theories.

Be friendly, be direct, and be yourself. Its that simple. How you equate that to beating a girl over the head with a club is truely boggling to my mind.

also, how can you say in one post that he will never be with this girl then in another say that he has a very good chance? someone seems to forget what he says

And where exactly did I say that?

 

[The Linuxator]

Originally posted by: BD2003
You see, I've got nothing to prove to you all. Whether or not you believe I have a GF or not, I could care less. Just because youre 25 and never been with a female doesnt mean that everyone else is relegated to that same pathetic state. Here on ATOT there is a severely disproportional amount of virgins, but that doesnt mean we all fall under that category.

Anyway, everyone can see that you are pathetic, and the only thing that can make you feel better about your state of affairs is trying to bring others down to your level. You can keep on dreaming about that as you can keep on dreaming about ever getting with a girl with your way of thinking.

You are a pussy, plain and simple. All I have ever advocated to linuxator is to not fall into the same trap you have. To be friendly, and to ask her out instead of sitting on the sidelines waiting for her to come to him. So far he's doing good, even though its like he's taking two steps forward and one step back. If all that can make you feel better is trying to diss me and act like I'm some kind of asshole who mistreats women, then by all means, keep on telling yourself that.

In the end, linuxator has a very good chance if he follows through with what he started, and all you've got for the forseeable future is your hand.

Come on BD pontifex isn't an expert in dating but was just pointing out some points, I don't want this thread to be crapped with personal disputes, not now, I really need you guys to work together by showing me each of your viewpoints, the date on Friday will be HAWT if she approves on it, I will do my very best to make it unforgetable for her (hopefully in a good way 😀).