Originally posted by: Atomic Playboy
I get confused by anyone who doesn't seem to think through the consequences of naming a child a particular way. For example, if your last name is "Raper," which is bad enough on its own, don't name your child anything that exists as a noun in the English language. Porter Raper? I'm not riding on a train with that guy.
In conjunction with the previous, don't name your child in a way where a nickname will make the kid's name into a prank phone call. If your last name is Hunt, don't name your son Michael. Common sense.
If you end up marrying someone with a funny name, and you have a funny name yourself, don't hyphenate your last names and pass them on to your children. We're the Hard-Gay family. Really? Sure, you may think it's hilarious, but your son is getting beat up in school.
Don't name your child after a natural phenomenon. OK, OK, you're a hippie, I get it, but if you name your child Rainbow, or Rabbit, or Sunshine, you're no better than the KKK family that names their children after Adolph Hitler. You're imposing your political views on your child before they are old enough to think. And what if they don't follow in your footsteps? I'm not taking legal advice from anyone named Waterfall. You're setting your children up for failure you damn hippie.
And stop spelling names in a funny way to be "different." I realize that this is more prevalent in black communities, and I'm not trying to be racist, because I honestly like names like "Shaniqua" more than "William," but can we at least standardize the spelling? It's not Dahntay, it's Dante. It's not Dwyane, it's Dwayne (Duane is acceptable, but for some reason looks a lot less cool). And this goes to all those people who think it's cute to replace a "y" at the end of a girl's name with an "i". It's not Tiffani, it's not Stephani, it's not Kimberli, it's obnoxious. Stop it. If you name your girl that, they're going to be dotting their "i"s with hearts for the rest of their life and they'll be pregnant by 15.
