My Wife is not Taking my Name

[ViperXX]

For all those men who married women that refused to change their last name to yours. You need to subscribe to this magazine. You all make me sick, bunch of wussies!

 

[Nitemare]

Originally posted by: ViperXX
For all those men who married women that refused to change their last name to yours. You need to subscribe to this magazine. You all make me sick, bunch of wussies!

I kicked mine to the curb, do I get a cookie?

 

[fs5]

no

 

[bigalt]

As a married couple, people expect to be able to address you as "Mr. & Mrs XXXX", and not taking a name really screws that up. It doesn't really matter who's name you take(this whole "continuing the family name" thing really is irrelevant, who cares in the first place?), as long as the names are the same.

but why bow down to what people expect to have the privilege of doing?

my dad's mother, the last married woman to bear his name, is dead, and that's exactly what i would tell all the solicitors who called asking for mrs. t

i think people should do whatever they want, though changing names seems like a big unnecessary hassle. of course i'm my girlfriend's ticket out of the anonimity of nguyenism.

 

[Kenazo]

I think it's important for the entire family unit to have the same last name. It is called a "Family name" for a reason. It doesn't necessarily need to be the husband's name, just something to cement the family unit.

 

[Nitemare]

Originally posted by: Kenazo
I think it's important for the entire family unit to have the same last name. It is called a "Family name" for a reason. It doesn't necessarily need to be the husband's name, just something to cement the family unit.

Did read an article where some husband and wife were naming their offspring after Elvis, his family and where he was from. Think they said they were fubarred on the 15th if it was a boy though

 

[kranky]

Originally posted by: jagec

Originally posted by: kranky
I have a neighbor (Jones) whose wife kept her maiden name (Smith). The kids have hyphenated last names (i.e. Smith-Jones). There records get screwed up all the time. Half the time they are under Jones because the hyphen gets ignored. Sometimes they are under Smith-Jones. Sometimes they are under Smithjones. And sometimes they are just Smith.

I asked his wife what happens if their kid marries someone who also has a hyphenated last name, and she told me to shut up.

Another friend took her husband's name when they married, but kept her maiden name for her job because she was established already.

As someone with a hyphenated last name, I feel their pain.

However, if they had last names like "Smith" and "Jones" WHY did she care? Those are the most generic names in the world.

Sorry, I should have mentioned I was using examples. Their real names are relatively short ethnic names.

 

[dfi]

If she uses your last name on a lot of things, then I say keep your mouth shut. Actually bringing up the issue could cause an unnecessary fight, and she might also stop using your last name. Just let it become a habit... when enough time has passed, and she hasn't changed it yet, and you are feeling brave, then bring it up.

dfi

 

[imported_yovonbishop]

I would definitely take my boyfriend's last name when the time came to get married. My last name doesn't mean anything to me. I think that to marry the one person I truly love would be an honor along with taking his last name. Just because I would take his last name doesn't mean that I'm completely submissive and whatnot, it just means I'm traditional I guess. Besides, I don't want to walk around with my crumby last name for the rest of my life anyway.

 

[Lazy8s]

I don't really understand the hype about "carrying on the family name" but maybe that's cause I'm a guy and most likely I'll get to keep my last name, but if it came down to it I don't see the problem with changing my last name. I love my parents and all but when I get married THAT's my family and my family name will be whatever my wife and I give it.

 

[dabuddha]

That would definitely bother me. How do you not get around to it for 6 years?
Another question is what last name will the kids be getting?

 

[Kelemvor]

If she uses your last name for some things then it should be changed or any of those "things" are illegal and you could run into problems on technicalities in the future.

So, yes. I'd have her go change it or stop using it to avoid any future problems.

 

[Amused]

Originally posted by: ViperXX
For all those men who married women that refused to change their last name to yours. You need to subscribe to this magazine. You all make me sick, bunch of wussies!

If you think forcing a woman to give up her identity makes you a man, you have a lot to learn about being a man.

If you love the woman, and she loves you, why should you care what fscking name she chooses to use?

 

[homestarmy]

Are Tom Cruise and Penelope Cruz still together?

I think they should get married and she can be Penelope Cruz-Cruise

 

[homestarmy]

I think hypenating names for kids is just plain stupid. I used to know a girl with the last name collins-mandeville and man tha was just the dumbest thing ever, you couldn't fit it anywhere.

 

[jcwagers]

Originally posted by: XZeroII
I think that it is part of marriage. Granted, there are exceptions such as if the woman has a famous last name or whatnot, but for the most part, I think that it should be treated as part of the marriage tradition. Having the same last name, to me, shows a bond between two people.

Agree 100%. :thumbsup:

 

[spidey07]

I guess I could see problems later on....if she's using your last name and signing anything for you then legally I think there could be trouble.

Identity/credit/reporting agencies, etc.

 

[Mallow]

Taking the husbands last name can bring continuity to the relationship... especially for the children. What last name are they supposed to use? wtf?

 

[Garet Jax]

Originally posted by: Aztech
We've been married for about 6 years. I know, it's pretty late to be asking, but help me out anyway. She still hasn't gone to whatever office and changed to my last name. She uses my last name on a lot of things, but it's not official yet. It always comes up at tax time, when we have to use her name, and then I always forget about it again. Is there any reason for me to insist that she take my name?

I guess, I'll be googling about this while you guys tell me what you think. Oh yeah, one other thing, she has one sister and no brothers, so she actually wanted me to take her name, to carry on her family name, since I have two brothers to carry on ours. Now, I will say this, her family name is a lot easier to pronounce than my foreign family name.

Talk to me, yo...

The only really pressing issue with names changes (other than emotional things) relate to children. If husband and wife have two different last names (even if she appends yours to hers), then what last name will the child have?

 

[jlee]

Originally posted by: PlatinumGold
my wife's maiden name is the same as my last name (Lee, probably the most common asian name)

so, did she take my name or not? i don't know, should i care?

Hah..so is mine. I'm not asian, though.

 

[alkemyst]

Originally posted by: ViperXX
For all those men who married women that refused to change their last name to yours. You need to subscribe to this magazine. You all make me sick, bunch of wussies!

If that makes you 'sick' the wussie is you.

I am confident enough to not have to have my wife take my name. It was never even an issue, I asked if she was going to keep her name or not.

What makes you a man?

 

[Jzero]

Originally posted by: alkemyst

Originally posted by: ViperXX
For all those men who married women that refused to change their last name to yours. You need to subscribe to this magazine. You all make me sick, bunch of wussies!

If that makes you 'sick' the wussie is you.

I am confident enough to not have to have my wife take my name. It was never even an issue, I asked if she was going to keep her name or not.

What makes you a man?

A big honkin' e-wang.

 

[Lola]

The thing is... I am going to be more than happy to take my future husbands name. I am proud to be his wife. Thats how i think of it. Not giving up ME.

You dont loose your identity just beacuse you change your last name.
So, i guess if you dont care, than its no big deal.

 

[alkemyst]

Originally posted by: jcwagers

Originally posted by: XZeroII
I think that it is part of marriage. Granted, there are exceptions such as if the woman has a famous last name or whatnot, but for the most part, I think that it should be treated as part of the marriage tradition. Having the same last name, to me, shows a bond between two people.

Agree 100%. :thumbsup:

wow both broad minded enough to think about all the other cultures out there and that all are not patriarchal.

 

[Koing]

Originally posted by: jcwagers

Originally posted by: XZeroII
I think that it is part of marriage. Granted, there are exceptions such as if the woman has a famous last name or whatnot, but for the most part, I think that it should be treated as part of the marriage tradition. Having the same last name, to me, shows a bond between two people.

Agree 100%. :thumbsup:

I agree also.

My gf will take my name. I hope the rest of you guys that plan on marriage later talk about this stuff BEFOREHAND!

Koing