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My Mom has cancer

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Originally posted by: iamwiz82
Thanks for the support everyone.

I went with her to the ultrasound of her abdomen today. The nurse couldn't officially say good or bad, but she said it looked okay to her. I'll breathe easier once she has it removed.
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Well hopefully that let's you breathe a little easier in the meantime. How is your dad holding up at this time?
 
Hang in there dude, be strong and be there for your folks and family, and remember that there are plenty of friendly ears here for you too.
 
Well, things are looking pretty grim. We have difinitive diagnosis that the colon cancer is at least stage 3, and meetings with the surgeon and Oncologist that lead us to believe spread to at least her liver 🙁. We won't know until the Biopsy, but the urgency in the Oncologist's demands leads me to believe he is very concerned. He has ordered a whole host of tests to be done ASAP, 6 to be completed by next Wednesday. We've begun to investigate homeopathic remedies as well, something I would have laughed off 6 months ago.

She's also becoming very depressed. Her physician gave her a script for Xanax which has helped, but the change since her diagnosis makes me incredibly sad, she's whithering away so quickly.
 
Originally posted by: iamwiz82
...

She's also becoming very depressed. Her physician gave her a script for Xanax which has helped, but the change since her diagnosis makes me incredibly sad, she's whithering away so quickly.
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🙁

So sorry to hear this.

Best wishes to you and family.

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Grrr, this makes me so angry and helpless and I'm reminded of my cousin's mom fighting the bravest battle against stomach cancer 6 yrs. ago:|🙁- my thoughts and prayers are with you
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PM me if you ever need to talk. I went through lung and brain cancer with my mother a few years back, and there are quite a few things I wish someone had told me to do differently. It will be the most difficult thing you'll ever go through, but you will find strength you never knew you had, and you must do your best to enact the same strength in your family.
Realize that everyone will deal with it differently, but don't fault them for it. Be there for her the best YOU can. The little things matter now, talk to her as much as possible and eek out those stories she never wanted to tell you. Take lots of pictures together, take videos together. Bring her flowers, make her breakfast, rub her feet. These will be the things that compete for your memories along with the rough times. You will be a changed man after this part of your life, do your absolute best to minimize regret.
 
Sir. My prayers are with you and your loved ones.

It's sad, and I know your pain - as I'm sure many other that have posted that have seen this in their lives.

Just know, you'll have friends here to hear you.
 
iamwiz82, i'm so sorry to hear about that. i will keep her, you, and your family in my prayers. like one of the posters said, try to support her the best you can.
 
Originally posted by: scott916
The little things matter now, talk to her as much as possible and eek out those stories she never wanted to tell you.
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Funny you mention that, my father is having a very hard time, but he is hold strong so far. We went with him to the health food tonight and while driving with him, that's what he did. He related a few of his auto industry stories that I found pretty amusing, such as the time he rivetted himself to a mid-60s Chrysler car after catching his shirt in the trim. :laugh:
 
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I don't even know what to say. There are no words that can be spoken by a perfect stranger on the internet that can help how you and your family feel.

You have my deepest sympathies though.

 
its amazing how fast one can suddenly pass away when told they have cancer... but prior to that they seemed fine, even with the different pains, but once you lose hope... you fade much faster
 
Originally posted by: iamwiz82

EDIT - 9/29:

Well, things are looking pretty grim. We have difinitive diagnosis that the colon cancer is at least stage 3, and meetings with the surgeon and Oncologist that lead us to believe spread to at least her liver 🙁. We won't know until the Biopsy, but the urgency in the Oncologist's demands leads me to believe he is very concerned. He has ordered a whole host of tests to be done ASAP, 6 to be completed by next Wednesday. We've begun to investigate homeopathic remedies as well, something I would have laughed off 6 months ago.

She's also becoming very depressed. Her physician gave her a script for Xanax which has helped, but the change since her diagnosis makes me incredibly sad, she's whithering away so quickly.
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Damn. I'm very sorry to hear this. Colon and liver cancer is what took my mom in 97. From the original diagnosis and surgery, she made it about 11 months. Her oncologist put her through all sorts of living hell with radiation and chemo trying to stop it, but in the end, it only made her sick for her last few months.

Spend as much time with her as you can. Love her, cherish her, don't avoid her because she's sick and/or needs her rest. Spend as much time with her as possible...because you never know when the visit will be the last time you see her...and regrets like, "I didn't go see her often enough," or, "I didn't tell her enough how much I love her," or, any of a million things that will run through your head once she's gone will tear you apart.
Please don't think me cold and heartless, but in my experience with this hated disease, (I lost my mom, my FiL, my MiL, and several very close friends to cancer) once the disease starts metastasizing, especially to the liver, her time is going to be very limited, no matter what kind of radiation, chemo, homeopathic remedies/treatments she goes through. Spend as much of it with her as possible, and do your best to take care of your dad. He's about to lose his life partner. He'll need all the support the family can give...and more.

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FUCK!! I HATE CANCER!!
 
my mom was diagnosed with lung cancer 4 years ago. it has been difficult, though she has tried to remain strong. it's advanced, unfortunately and it's very hard to see how she has changed and deteriorated. my thoughts are with your family.
 
Originally posted by: BoomerD
once the disease starts metastasizing, especially to the liver, her time is going to be very limited, no matter what kind of radiation, chemo, homeopathic remedies/treatments she goes through. Spend as much of it with her as possible, and do your best to take care of your dad. He's about to lose his life partner. He'll need all the support the family can give...and more.
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I lost my mother to cancer. As muhc as the doctors believed it would be a slow prgressing cancer, she was gone after only 9 months. No matter what the doctors say, you can't rely on any time estimations they may give you. Just be with her as often as you possibly can and relish in these moments.
 
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