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My dad's awe inspiring statement of the night...

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"What the hell is your problem?"
First thing he said to me when I woke up to this morning, wonderful isn't it 😀

My dad has nothing else better to do but b!tch & whine about everything... hmm I wonder if he knows what STFU means?
 
Originally posted by: SuperCommando
My dad is insane, sometimes. He gets a catch phrase and doesn't let it go for weeks. He just recently stopped walking around the house, hiding in dark corners and whispering to us when we walked nearby: "Can you hear me now?" I'd be sitting in my room at the computer and I'd hear him say that and I'd look over and there's his head, poking out from the top of the stairs. It was only a couple of weeks before that when he stopped saying "Zoom zoom!" like in the Mazda commercial.

For the longest time, he's said: "I like cats. But I can't eat a whole one." (substitute "cats" for any other animal....)

He doesn't ever have anything profound or intelligent to say. He's just odd.
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😀
Your dad is freakin' awesome. How much would it cost for him to be weird at my house?

 
A month ago, my dad came to visit, and I told him I smoked weed. Funny thing is, he does too. I would have NEVER guessed. So we started to smoke, and he told me something that I'll never forget. "Son, don't smoke dope when you're already stoned." That quote will always make me laugh.
 
Originally posted by: PsychoAndy
Originally posted by: PeeluckyDuckee
"you eat the rice, but you don't know the price" - lol, that's almost a classic one in asian families 🙂
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25 cents a pound! i told you already!

-PAB
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Dude......... you are getting so ripped off............ you can get rice for 5 cents a pound with free shipping on the hot deals forum 😉

Cheers,
Aquaman
 
There were so many, but the one that had the most profound impact in my life was:

Never take an ultimatum from a woman (GF or wife).

He said the minute you accept one, they start controlling your life. And he was right. Damn was he right.
 
from my mother:

How do you expect me to get there, stick a feather up my @ss and fly like Dumbo? (said when she did not have a car, I tried to explain later on that the feather did not make him fly, she still doesn't believe me)

Grow some skin and get over it (whenever someone's feelings got hurt)

Sh*t or get off the pot (whenever taking too much time in bathroom)

What do you think, we live in a barn. (left door open)
I would reply naaaaaaaaaaahhhhh!
Brother would reply that's bahhhhhhhhhhhdddd.
then we would run.

What do you think, we are heating the world. (left door open in winter)

Do you think I'm stupid? (never brave enough to answer this one)

When we ran away when she was gonna spank us, she would reply "You gotta sleep sometime"

You don't know didly-squat. (never did know him)

Wish on one hand, sh*t in the other and see which one gets filled first.

You don't have time to do it right but you do have time to do it over, huh? (this was a good one)

This is definitely gonna hurt you more than it hurts me because I will be able to sit down later.

 
Originally posted by: PsychoAndy
Originally posted by: DaveSohmer
Originally posted by: PsychoAndy
Not 2 minutes ago......

Me: Mom, I'm refinancing the house.
Mom: At what rate?
Me: 6 points. no closing.
Mom: Its not worth it, we're paying 7.

-PAB
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Just to be clear. You have found someone to lower your interest rate by 1% and you pay no closing costs, fees, points, etc? Or are you just rolling it all into the new loan? The reason I ask is that the general rule of thumb for refinancing I have always read is that the rate drops by at least 2% and you plan on living in the house for at least 10 more years. Every case has it's own merits, I'm sure.
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Chief, although young and stupid I do realize that and I have used the 2% as a rule of thumb. From what mom and dad tell me, if you dont save at least 2% the costs associated with refinancing offset the savings.

After some shopping around the internet I found some excellent rates. Depending on the lender, I saw CharterOne mortgage is offering a 15 year no points 6% fixed rate, no closing cost refinance to certain states. I'm gonna check in the morning with them and see if FL qualifies for no closing costs on a refinance.

Another lender (Avant Lending Group 323.935.8355) is offering 5.75% with the same prerequsites as CharterOne (1-800-288-5569) but with an $800 closing.

I checked for TN and obviously the rate will depend on your credit rating but I found 5.75% and about $1100 in closing costs thru First Rate Mortgage.

-PAB
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First of all, I'm not accusing you of being stupid. Far from it. However, my initial reaction would have been similar to your Mom's although it would have been phrased as a question. The refinancing of mortgages is a billion dollar industry and sometimes it's not worth it when you figure up all the costs.

Thanks for looking up the TN rates. We are firmly ensconced in base housing, aren't planning on staying here when I retire in ~18 months, and aren't looking for a house. I would probably finance VA through Navy Federal Credit Union when we do buy a house.

To get back to the topic, my all-time favorite fatherly comment, "Boy you're as useless as a barb wire jockstrap." It stung like a bitch at the time, it's funny as hell now.

Dave
 
Few things I learned from my father (RIP):

"You never, EVER point a gun at someone else, even if the gun is not loaded!"
"Unloaded guns cause more accidents than loaded ones do"

Yep, he liked guns 😛!
 
"Measure twice, cut once."

Me, looking at first pay stub: "They sure do take out a lot in taxes."
Dad: "Welcome to the real world."

"You don't want a Corvette." (translation: he doesn't want a corvette)
 
Listen to your Dad. He's wiser than you think. Mine died 7 years ago when I was 32 and I miss him a lot. Althought I hated his guts many times as a teen and into my early 20's, he did have a lot of wisdom. Here are some of his funnier sayings:

"Sh!t fire and save matches" (saying when he was surprised)
"I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid"
"Your grandmother has her goddamned bladder mounted behind her eyeballs she cries so much."

There are others, but those are some of my favorites.
 
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