My dad's awe inspiring statement of the night...

[aphex]

"If you buy crap, you get crap"



Anyone elses parents have equally profound statements?

 

[Hayabusa Rider]

Originally posted by: aphexII
"If you buy crap, you get crap" Anyone elses parents have equally profound statements?

Listen to him. Pearls before swine otherwise


One of my fathers-- Never feel obligated to participate in someone elses foolishness.

 

[pyonir]

My dad:

What the hell did you do that for?

 

[Riprorin]

There aren't enough dollars to buy that kind of wisdom.

 

[Chaotic42]

"Why the hell did you do that, boy?"

 

[BD231]

"Think before talk", or, "Draw a circle around it, cry later"

 

[MajesticMoose]

one of my friends once said something was "pretty big for it's size"

 

[compudog]

My dad: "Wish in one hand and crap in the other and see which you get first!"

 

[Jfur]

My Dad is a font of bizarre (but often endearing) statements...

"School will rot your brain!" (to young children :Q)

"Sledgehammer the tv before it destroys our minds!" [he DID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]

"When are you giving me grandchildren?" [spoken to me at age 15]

2 of my favorites (and ones that are not funny and that I hold dear):

"Release bitterness."

"Work for yourself, for love of the work itself, and not for any rewards or to avoid negative consequences."

 

[SSP]

Originally posted by: compudog
My dad: "Wish in one hand and crap in the other and see which you get first!"

LMAO!

Mine: "Go mow the lawn".

 

[PsychoAndy]

Jfur, you dad is a genius.

Some Momisms:

"I know you like a boat!"
"Your father was so happy he was jumping around like a grasshopper."
"Whats the difference between the army and the navy?

Some Dadisms:

"Yes SirMam"
"Get out of my kitchen"
"Hi how are you?"
"Hi how are you?"
"Hi how are you?"

Thats about it.

-PAB

 

[gotsmack]

Originally posted by: Jfur
My Dad is a font of bizarre (but often endearing) statements...

"School will rot your brain!" (to young children :Q)

"Sledgehammer the tv before it destroys our minds!" [he DID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]

"When are you giving me grandchildren?" [spoken to me at age 15]

2 of my favorites (and ones that are not funny and that I hold dear):

"Release bitterness."

"Work for yourself, for love of the work itself, and not for any rewards or to avoid negative consequences."

are you from the south?

 

[Jfur]

are you from the south?

Hawaii My Dad now admits the demand for grandchildren was not a good idea and avoided requesting that from my younger sister

 

[aphex]

Ive always found that answering the following question by saying, YES, seems to piss them off more.... 'What am i, made out of money?'

 

[PsychoAndy]

Not 2 minutes ago......

Me: Mom, I'm refinancing the house.
Mom: At what rate?
Me: 6 points. no closing.
Mom: Its not worth it, we're paying 7.

-PAB

 

[Jfur]

Originally posted by: PsychoAndy
Not 2 minutes ago......

Me: Mom, I'm refinancing the house.
Mom: At what rate?
Me: 6 points. no closing.
Mom: Its not worth it, we're paying 7.

-PAB

Keep her away from your finances!

 

[notfred]

"some crap about the new world order and the jewish conspiracy and the trilateral commison and a world government led by the UN taking away our freedoms along with imposing the evils of the metric system, yadda, yadda, yadda, quite litterlly for at least 45 minutes while you sit there BORED STIFF cause I gave you the exact same pointless lecture yesterday for absolutely no reason and I think I'm losing my mind" <- my dad.

Also: "I bet you could run across the freeway."

 

[JimmyEatWorld]

Somthing my old boss would say:
"in and out like a bad habit"

Something my co-worker said the other day (said in a thick Texas accent):
"Why is a dry heat better than a wet heat? ....... Cus a dry fart is better than a wet fart"

 

[kt]

Originally posted by: PsychoAndy
Not 2 minutes ago......

Me: Mom, I'm refinancing the house.
Mom: At what rate?
Me: 6 points. no closing.
Mom: Its not worth it, we're paying 7.

-PAB

6%? Where are you getting that rate? I am trying to refinance mine, and right now the lowest is 6.375% for 30yr fixed.

 

[PsychoAndy]

Originally posted by: Jfur

Originally posted by: PsychoAndy
Not 2 minutes ago......

Me: Mom, I'm refinancing the house.
Mom: At what rate?
Me: 6 points. no closing.
Mom: Its not worth it, we're paying 7.

-PAB

Keep her away from your finances!

Oh, Jfur I learned that lesson already. I was 16 and had $5000. She told me to invest in the stock market. So i bought into a 150 year old company. In march. Of 2001. I just got my statement yesterday. $350.

-PAB

 

[BigJ]

Here's one:

Interesting...that and a token will get you on the subway.

 

[Fritzo]

'Dumber than a box of rocks.." was a favorite.

Come to think of it, "Never sh!t where you eat" was one he said too, but I never understood why he said it

 

[quirky]

my dad:








yep, my dad sux

 

[PsychoAndy]

Originally posted by: BigJ2078
Here's one:

Interesting...that and a token will get you on the subway.

I've heard a variation of that. For example,

Arent all ebay bids a legally binding transaction?

Yep. That and a quarter will get you a ride on the subway.

Basically, not a hell of a lot.

-PAB

 

[BigJ]

Originally posted by: PsychoAndy

Originally posted by: BigJ2078
Here's one:

Interesting...that and a token will get you on the subway.

I've heard a variation of that. For example,

Arent all ebay bids a legally binding transaction?

Yep. That and a quarter will get you a ride on the subway.

Basically, not a hell of a lot.

-PAB

Haha! so my dad IS an unoriginal b@stard