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MS Office update is freakishly slow

I've noticed a problem lately with Microsoft Office in that in different revisions/updates of it, the option to disable Copilot is missing from the Options UI.

For example, I have Office Pro Plus 2021 in a Win10 VM (7800X3D CPU, four cores visible to the VM, oodles of everything spec-wise). The option was present, then I received Word version 2512, then the option was gone. As I've seen newer versions (admittedly of 365 on customers' machines, which sometimes show the option or not), I thought I'd try running the 'update now' option. Ten minutes and counting...

I'm pretty certain that if I uninstalled Office, downloaded the full ISO from MS and installed it again, it would be done quicker than this. It goes through brief bursts of single-core saturation then it uses about 20% of the (not hugely fast) Internet connection, sometimes just sits there letting the machine go completely idle...

Lordy! Fifteen minutes later and it's now "applying updates"!

Windows can be installed quicker than this.

Version 2601 (the latest version of Word I've seen including on 365) - Copilot option is still missing.
 
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I don't really fool with windows much, but it seems like any update takes forever. I have no idea what it's doing, but I could have most of a bare metal debian install done before windows gets libreoffice updated.
 
I don't really fool with windows much, but it seems like any update takes forever. I have no idea what it's doing, but I could have most of a bare metal debian install done before windows gets libreoffice updated.
Both Windows and Apple products seem to go insanely slow next to the Linux Mint installs I watch over. At least with Mint I can expand the window and it shows me exactly what it's doing and working on. Downloading a bunch of files at once and then unpacking and installing.

The others hide everything behind obscurity.
 
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