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Members Of Twisted Sister Now Willing To Take It.

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After years of living the decadent life of money, sex, drugs and rock and roll, the Rolling Stones announced that they are finally satisfied with their lot in life.
 
This just in- an entry in Paul's lost diary claims " Sept. 3 1973. John, with an impish grin, imagines all the people dying a hellish misery. I said, that's a wee bit rough, a real downer before our bukake therapy with Yoko".
 
A member of the Baja Men came forward today stating that he accidentally left the gate open. He apologized for the inconvenience.
 
Originally posted by: The J
A member of the Baja Men came forward today stating that he accidentally left the gate open. He apologized for the inconvenience.
Click to expand...

🙂

In other news, Afroman is really just lazy and bad at managing time and finances
 
In an interview last Sunday Michael Stipe has revealed that he can "keep up with you" and is no longer losing his religion. He also vehemently denies he was ever in the corner, despite his prior croonings.

"Corner? That wasn't me in the corner. It might have been Moby."

While he did spend some time in the spotlight, he denies that he has done such a thing since the late '90s.



 
Homosexual gangs in San Franciso vote in favor of replacing the traditional drive-by shooting with the drive-by spanking.
 
Originally posted by: Apple Of Sodom
In an interview last Sunday Michael Stipe has revealed that he can "keep up with you" and is no longer losing his religion. He also vehemently denies he was ever in the corner, despite his prior croonings.

"Corner? That wasn't me in the corner. It might have been Moby."

While he did spend some time in the spotlight, he denies that he has done such a thing since the late '90s.
Click to expand...

He is also quoted as stating that he no longer has a spider nor an Orange Crush, and went so far as recommending that you NOT stand in the place where you live or work.
 
Originally posted by: SunnyD
Originally posted by: Apple Of Sodom
In an interview last Sunday Michael Stipe has revealed that he can "keep up with you" and is no longer losing his religion. He also vehemently denies he was ever in the corner, despite his prior croonings.

"Corner? That wasn't me in the corner. It might have been Moby."

While he did spend some time in the spotlight, he denies that he has done such a thing since the late '90s.
Click to expand...

He is also quoted as stating that he no longer has a spider nor an Orange Crush, and went so far as recommending that you NOT stand in the place where you live or work.
Click to expand...

He has also stated that, while some people may indeed hurt, he would not presume to speak for everybody.
 
And in a startling revelation today, members of AC/DC came out in support of late member Bon Scott admitting that he did not indeed have big balls. However each would not comment on the status of their own balls.
 
The lady who's sure all that glitters is gold and is buying a stairway to heaven, is no longer so sure after construction costs of the massive project increase three fold over original estimate.
 
A 60 Minutes special reveals that Bruce Springsteen was not born in the USA and that his birth certificate was a fraud. The E Street Band immediately disassociated themselves with Mr. Springsteen. E Street drummer Max Weinberg was quoted as saying, "This is not the Bruce Springsteen that I thought I knew."
 
Metallica posted on their website today that they would release a follow up to their smash hit song "One" as a special download to Rockband players. After consulting with lawyers and a trio of psychologists they have settled on the title of "Two" for the new track.

Also mentioned on the website is a DVD documentary of the making of their new album "Death Magnetic". The title of the production is slated to be "Clip 'Em All".
 
Salt N Pepa announced today that they no longer have any interest in talking about sex. Discussing the details in a candid interview, "Pepa" was quoted as stating that she was attempting to chill, mindin' her own business when she realized her weakness was in fact not men. She differed to "Salt" who stated that it was not actually a mighty fine man, and it should no longer be pushed.
 
After discovering the beauty of Niagra Falls, the surviving members of TLC released a joint statement saying they "deeply regret" thier 90's hit song.
 
Robin Zander has announced that he no longer cares whether or not you want him, need him, love him, or beg him.
 
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