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MAJOR woman question -- Opinions wanted!

Okay, I'm getting married in two months. We have been together for 7 years. I have been faithful the whole time. I love her very much, and I know she loves me. Things are great between us, I won't say perfect because nothing is, but it is great.

Now, suddenly a girl I know tells me in so many words that she wants to .... well, get to know me better. If you know what I mean. She is FULLY aware that I'm getting married, in fact, she has a steady boyfriend as well. I have known this other woman longer than I have known my fiancee. We actually used to go out. She is a very good friend. I know that if I were to do anything with her it would be cool, she would not expect me to dump my fiance, and would not rat me out to anyone. We have no mutual friends. And she has a boyfriend too.

So my question to you fine people is, what should I do? Or rather, what would you do? Any opinions?

---

Not only are your morals out of wack, so are your forum ethics. You are now on a two week suspension, ivol.

AnandTech Moderator





 


<< know that if I were to do anything with her it would be cool, she would not expect me to dump my fiance, and would not rat me out to anyone. We have no mutual friends. And she has a boyfriend too. >>


And do you both not have any morals?
 
If this is even a question in your mind, then your view of marriage differs greatly from mine. Why even think about getting married if you're thinking about getting with other chicks?
 
notmyreallogin

By the way, nice non-attention drawing login. How about now the MODs take your real login in and make it your real banned login?
 
Geez, I'm glad I did'nt use my real name.

Anyway, I view MARRIAGE as a great thing. But I'm not married yet. And I have never thought about getting with other chicks. This just happened to come to me. I have never gone out and picked up chicks or anything like that. It never even crossed my mind. This is just an unexpected event that I'm currently dealing with. Are any of you men out there telling me that if an attractive woman came up to you and said that she wanted to have sex with you, and thats it, you would'nt even CONSIDER it? That is a lie.
 
uh, if you really love your soon-to-be wife, this should be a no-brainer.. duh! i cant believe you even asked such a question..

edit: reason he mentions ban, is cuz you're only allowed one username on the boards.
 


<< Talk about one hell of a debut post. >>

Um, look at his username: NotMyRealLogin. Yeah, that sounds like an ATOT first post. He's just trying to keep secrecy.
Dude, don't do it. The woman is sensing that you're about to be taken from the dating pool and she's panicking. I've seen a few women do that before. You used to date and now you're friends. She's trying to see how faithful you are. I guarantee if you hook up with her it will be one of the biggest mistakes of your life. Even if your wife never finds out you'll still know that you could not be faithful to your fiancee/wife. Just think back as to why you proposed to her in the first place. By giving her that ring you are agreeing to be only with her forever (hopefully). Next time you see the other woman mention something to her. Or don't. But she will bring up the hook-up subject again. When it happens look down at your wedding ring and think of your fiancee.
 
it doesnt matter if she tells and busts you, the fling WILL have an affect on your relationship. Assuming that you are human, and have emotions. The fling will not happen in a vaccum(kinky), it will affect you

If you are serious at all about marriage and spending your entire life devoted to your wife in every way, this is a bad way to start
 


<< Anyway, I view MARRIAGE as a great thing. But I'm not married yet. And I have never thought about getting with other chicks. This just happened to come to me. I have never gone out and picked up chicks or anything like that. It never even crossed my mind. This is just an unexpected event that I'm currently dealing with. Are any of you men out there telling me that if an attractive woman came up to you and said that she wanted to have sex with you, and thats it, you would'nt even CONSIDER it? That is a lie. >>



Two months before I got married? No sir, that is no lie. If you cheat on your fiancee, I hope she finds out before the wedding and calls it off. :| God people are sick. All you bothered to mention is how you wouldnt get caught, you didnt bother to mention how your supposed "love of your life" would feel about it.



<< And by the way, why would I get banned for opening a new account? Just because you don't like my question does'nt mean I should get banned. >>



Because one person having multiple accounts wastes bandwidth for the rest of us, ass.
 


<< And by the way, why would I get banned for opening a new account? Just because you don't like my question does'nt mean I should get banned. >>


Rules state: One account and that is it.
 


<< Are any of you men out there telling me that if an attractive woman came up to you and said that she wanted to have sex with you, and thats it, you would'nt even CONSIDER it? That is a lie. >>

Are you trying to allieviate your guilt or what? that statement is so full of holes...

No I wouldn't consider it in your circumstances.
I don't hold marriage in any particular regard. But if you have any repsect for your partner the answer would be obvious. Obviously you don't respect her all that much. Too bad about the last 7 years and all. But I think you need to reconsider your position if you really want to bang this other ho.

By the way, signing up for a new login ID like this is a bannable offense as I recall.
 


<< Geez, I'm glad I did'nt use my real name.

Anyway, I view MARRIAGE as a great thing. But I'm not married yet. And I have never thought about getting with other chicks. This just happened to come to me. I have never gone out and picked up chicks or anything like that. It never even crossed my mind. This is just an unexpected event that I'm currently dealing with. Are any of you men out there telling me that if an attractive woman came up to you and said that she wanted to have sex with you, and thats it, you would'nt even CONSIDER it? That is a lie.
>>

Oh don't get me wrong, I would consider it. But thats as far as it would go. If I've given a woman a ring, you can be damn sure I'm going to honor her. Just remember the saying. You can look at the menu but you're officially on a diet. And for the record, in case you haven't picked up on it yet, I think the monogamy of marriage begins when you get down on one knee and ask a certain question.
 
how would you feel if the reverse happened and your finance's was in the same situation... i guess you wouldnt mind huh??

edit: re-reading your initial comment (skimmed thru the first time), it sounds like you're trying to justify having this fling.. like it's no big deal.. maybe you should call off the wedding until you're 100% commited to the idea of marriage..
 
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