Looking for tips on dementia in family member

Neurorelay

Platinum Member
Jul 21, 2004
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Over the last year my grandmothers personality has been degrading to the state of a nine year old. In addition she is seeing "things" and becomes hostile when presented with the reality that the apparitions are not there.

Anyone else go through this and have any tips?

Aside from an increasing distance between us, lack of communication and unwilligness to be nice; what is to be done?

I believe it is coming near the end.
 

nageov3t

Lifer
Feb 18, 2004
42,808
83
91
it happened with my great grandmother. she forgot English and could only speak in French (her native language).

since none of us speaks fluent french, except my grandmother, who is pretty old herself, and we couldn't trust her to take care of herself, the descision was made to put her in a nursing home in quebec. (we have a lot of family up there, and most of my dad's brothers and sisters live just over the the border).
 

Orsorum

Lifer
Dec 26, 2001
27,631
5
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Well, my grandmother slipped into senile dementia for the last four years or so of her life. It was hell on my granddad and was really hard on my father and sister. The only real tips I can give you are to be strong, and to realize that while your grandmother's body and physical brain may waste away she still loves you. Cheesy, but I know it helped my family out a lot. Dementia is hell, you watch the person you thought you knew slip away bit by bit, and they don't even know it's happening. Be strong and keep living and realize that you too will someday meet your own inglorious end, and be there for her as she needs you.
 

The only thing you can do is keep talking to her and make her comfortable.

Good luck.
rose.gif
 

db

Lifer
Dec 6, 1999
10,575
292
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Be *kind*, patient, and forgiving. People in this condition are not intentionally trying to be difficult. What they are doing makes sense to them.
 

ribbon13

Diamond Member
Feb 1, 2005
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If only more old people would respectfully off themselves. I know I'd sooner commit suicide then be a helpless elder.
 

Originally posted by: ribbon13
If only more old people would respectfully off themselves. I know I'd sooner commit suicide then be a helpless elder.
:thumbsdown:

We'll see what you think of yourself when you're 80.

:|
 

loup garou

Lifer
Feb 17, 2000
35,132
1
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Originally posted by: ribbon13
If only more old people would respectfully off themselves. I know I'd sooner commit suicide then be a helpless elder.
STFU you fat fuck. :|
 

Dubb

Platinum Member
Mar 25, 2003
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my grandmother hasn't remembered who any of us are for at least 5 years, and my godfather has been sliding for the last 2 or so.

the thing is that when this happens, you can't assume they'll remmeber anything. They could be forgetting to take medication, or take it, then 5 minutes later, take it again. my godfather improved a great deal after we got him into a home that specialized in those types of things, we think mostly because he was mixing up his pills with his dogs'. You also have to remember, it's hard on them too. they have lucid moments, and tend to beat themselves up for acting as they have.

Which brings me to the important part - they really need to be in a place that can handle those disorders. usually labled "with a ward for the mentally enfeebled" or something like that. it can get pretty out there (some lose all inhibitions), but with the right care and the right people you can at least make it more comfortable for them.