OK, I know the election is over, but I thought this was funny. Hope
y'all do to...just in good fun, don't wanna start a flame-war. 😀
------------------------------------------------------------------------
FIRST DRAFT .....
BUSH'S ACCEPTANCE SPEECH (first draft)
My fellow Americans, it's about freaking time. All you liberals can just
kiss my big, white Texas butt if you think I'm gonna spew a boatload of
bipartisan BS. Let's set the record straight here. I won, dammit. Hell,
I won FOUR OR FIVE TIMES, you stupid jerks. We got the Presidency, we
got Congress, and by the end of four years we'll have even more of the
Supreme Court. The Republicans are here, and we're gonna show you how
it's done. Ya'll want me to reach across party lines now? How 'bout I
reach across and slap all your sorry-liberal-a$$es? How'dya like that?
Don't get me wrong, here. The sense of satisfaction I'm feeling right now
isn't that I've won. It's that I won't have to listen to Al Gore b!tch and
moan about "letting every vote count". The only reason this went as far
as it did is because you Democrats have a playground crybaby as your
poster-boy, and I for one am glad I won't have to see him on TV anymore.
This might sound snippy, Mr. Gore, but as we used to say in the
sandlot...LOSERS WALK!!!
As I said in my campaign, I promised to be a president who focuses on
education. My first task as President will be to start an educational
program for all you Florida-idiots who can't tell your elbow from your
a-hole or how to poke a stylus through the right hole. I don't get you
liberal Democrats: when we're talking about Bill Clinton and some office
tramp, you say that lack of penetration doesn't count; but when it comes
to ballots, lack of penetration DOES count.
You want a solution to this problem? Take some Viagra, you old farts,
and finish what you started next election. Until then, I want to ask you
just one question: "Who's yer daddy???"
And so I humbly accept the office of President of these United States.
Most humbly.
George W. Bush
😀
y'all do to...just in good fun, don't wanna start a flame-war. 😀
------------------------------------------------------------------------
FIRST DRAFT .....
BUSH'S ACCEPTANCE SPEECH (first draft)
My fellow Americans, it's about freaking time. All you liberals can just
kiss my big, white Texas butt if you think I'm gonna spew a boatload of
bipartisan BS. Let's set the record straight here. I won, dammit. Hell,
I won FOUR OR FIVE TIMES, you stupid jerks. We got the Presidency, we
got Congress, and by the end of four years we'll have even more of the
Supreme Court. The Republicans are here, and we're gonna show you how
it's done. Ya'll want me to reach across party lines now? How 'bout I
reach across and slap all your sorry-liberal-a$$es? How'dya like that?
Don't get me wrong, here. The sense of satisfaction I'm feeling right now
isn't that I've won. It's that I won't have to listen to Al Gore b!tch and
moan about "letting every vote count". The only reason this went as far
as it did is because you Democrats have a playground crybaby as your
poster-boy, and I for one am glad I won't have to see him on TV anymore.
This might sound snippy, Mr. Gore, but as we used to say in the
sandlot...LOSERS WALK!!!
As I said in my campaign, I promised to be a president who focuses on
education. My first task as President will be to start an educational
program for all you Florida-idiots who can't tell your elbow from your
a-hole or how to poke a stylus through the right hole. I don't get you
liberal Democrats: when we're talking about Bill Clinton and some office
tramp, you say that lack of penetration doesn't count; but when it comes
to ballots, lack of penetration DOES count.
You want a solution to this problem? Take some Viagra, you old farts,
and finish what you started next election. Until then, I want to ask you
just one question: "Who's yer daddy???"
And so I humbly accept the office of President of these United States.
Most humbly.
George W. Bush
😀
