Just venting: ARG...

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sao123

sao123

Lifer
May 27, 2002
12,656
207
106
Last summer one of my better friends asked me to be in his wedding, so I said yes.
Long story short...

I work a M-F 8-5pm schedule... and I don't have any off days available to use, because I had to use them at thanksgiving for my wife to have major surgery.

I come to find out that yesterday (his wedding is in 8 weeks) his wedding is at 3pm on a Friday, and the rehearsal is at 5pm the day before. So now I have to figure out how to get 1.5 off days in the next 8 weeks.

ARRRG...

who in their right mind plans a wedding at 3pm on a Friday.....
 
Platypus

Platypus

Lifer
Apr 26, 2001
31,046
321
136
how far away is the dinner? just bug out an hour early, then take the friday off.

Tell your boss about the situation and see if they'll let you dip into your next pool of days off when it rolls over.

Also, trying to book a venue for a weekend wedding is literally insanely expensive a lot of times, likely the reason for the timing.
 
sao123

sao123

Lifer
May 27, 2002
12,656
207
106
its about an hour away.

We don't get a "pool" I earn like 3.5 hours every 2 week pay period.
 
postmortemIA

postmortemIA

Diamond Member
Jul 11, 2006
7,721
40
91
why would you take day and half for this? i see that you need to take one hour on Thu and half day on Fri
 
M

mrjminer

Platinum Member
Dec 2, 2005
2,739
16
76
sao123 said:
its about an hour away.

We don't get a "pool" I earn like 3.5 hours every 2 week pay period.
Click to expand...

So, 6 weeks from now you will have 10.5 hours off? Sounds like you could just make it work. Or are you already paying back some hours?

Anyways, wedding shit during normal working hours is something an asshole would set up, unless it was on some non-familial holiday break day, like labor day or something. That's the type of thing you should have mentioned to him.
 
K

Kelvrick

Lifer
Feb 14, 2001
18,422
5
81
Wait wait wait. Please choose one of the following scenarios as I'm sure it will weed out many of the different responses that may not be applicable.

1) He JUST asked you to be in the wedding and you just found out it is 8 weeks from now.
2) He asked you a long time ago and you weren't involved in the planning at all and just found out the day/time/venue now.
3) He asked you a long time ago and JUST booked the day/time/venue.

Please see my responses for the above scenarios.
1) If you can't make it work, talk to him and maybe he'll choose someone else. We'll probably start probing why you can't make it work.
2) Was the information available and you just didn't pay attention until now? WTF have you been doing?
3) Did she just get preggors?
 
disappoint

disappoint

Lifer
Dec 7, 2009
10,132
382
126
You have the best chance for an excuse to not make it to one of the most boring, useless, meaningless ceremonies in all of humanity. 404 problem not found.
 
sao123

sao123

Lifer
May 27, 2002
12,656
207
106
mrjminer said:
So, 6 weeks from now you will have 10.5 hours off? Sounds like you could just make it work. Or are you already paying back some hours?

Anyways, wedding shit during normal working hours is something an asshole would set up, unless it was on some non-familial holiday break day, like labor day or something. That's the type of thing you should have mentioned to him.
Click to expand...

Paying back time already used from wife's surgery last thanksgiving. Had to take several weeks of fmla. To be home with her.
 
sao123

sao123

Lifer
May 27, 2002
12,656
207
106
Kelvrick said:
Wait wait wait. Please choose one of the following scenarios as I'm sure it will weed out many of the different responses that may not be applicable.

1) He JUST asked you to be in the wedding and you just found out it is 8 weeks from now.
2) He asked you a long time ago and you weren't involved in the planning at all and just found out the day/time/venue now.
3) He asked you a long time ago and JUST booked the day/time/venue.

Please see my responses for the above scenarios.
1) If you can't make it work, talk to him and maybe he'll choose someone else. We'll probably start probing why you can't make it work.
2) Was the information available and you just didn't pay attention until now? WTF have you been doing?
3) Did she just get preggors?
Click to expand...

2. Only reason I found out was because I got an invitation in the mail. My friend never told me it was on a Friday.

I can live with the Friday even if it was 6-7pm... Not 3pm during regular business hours.
 
sao123

sao123

Lifer
May 27, 2002
12,656
207
106
postmortemIA said:
why would you take day and half for this? i see that you need to take one hour on Thu and half day on Fri
Click to expand...

Thursday... Leave work. Pickup kids from school/daycare. Transport kids to my mothers for the evening. Go home, shower. Drive 1 hr to rehearsal. Arrive by 5pm.

Friday. Leave work, go home, shower, get into tux. Drive 1hr be there by 1pm for pre ceremony pictures? Don't see where you get half day.
 
kranky

kranky

Elite Member
Oct 9, 1999
21,020
156
106
I think most managers would be understanding of the situation. Ask if you can work extra before the wedding to be able to take time off. You are giving plenty of notice.

BTW last week I got a "save the date" postcard for an upcoming wedding - the wedding is on a Friday also. Maybe not as unusual as it used to be.
 
lxskllr

lxskllr

No Lifer
Nov 30, 2004
60,960
11,289
126
Did I just hear you cough? You aren't looking so great. I think you should take a couple days off until you feel better.
 
M

mikeford

Diamond Member
Jan 27, 2001
5,671
160
106
How "in the wedding party" are you going to be, maybe skip the rehearsal. Talk with your friend, many others may also have issues making it a SMALLER event than planned.
 
gorcorps

gorcorps

aka Brandon
Jul 18, 2004
30,741
456
126
When I was asked to be in a wedding, the first question was "when?"

Why that word never exited your word hole before you accepted is beyond me.
 
N

NetWareHead

THAT guy
Aug 10, 2002
5,847
154
106
Weddings are usually planned a year in advance. How did you just find out it was going to be on a Friday at 3:00 PM? Im sure you received an invite months ago.
 
V

Vdubchaos

Lifer
Nov 11, 2009
10,408
10
0
If he is REALLY your friend, ask your boss if you can put in extra hours during the week and take 1/2 day on Friday.
 
C

cbrunny

Diamond Member
Oct 12, 2007
6,791
406
126
Ask to work extra ahead of time, take off minimum time possible. If boss says no, say no to friend.
 
J

jaedaliu

Platinum Member
Feb 25, 2005
2,670
1
81
I think I got it:

OP took time off around Thanksgiving last year using the FMLA, which states that you may take job protecting unpaid leave to take care of your family. But instead of taking unpaid leave, he took paid leave by promising to give the company back his upcoming vacation time (which he's still paying off.)

Solution is to talk to your supervisor / HR to get at least half of Friday off. Depends on your friend and his wife, but you don't necessarily need to be there on time for the rehearsal. For my wedding, we didn't have a rehearsal, and the 1 wedding I was in, the groom's entire party missed the rehearsal because none of us had flown in yet.
 
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