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Just read my horoscope...

DainBramaged

DainBramaged

Lifer
Aquarius January 20 - February 18

When all is said and done, everyone will have to admit that, while it might not have been worth the loss of your arm, you were right about caribou.
 
Sagittarius (November 23 - December 21)

A small black hole will pass through your brain on Tuesday. Less than a millimeter in dimater this incredibly dense ball of matter will cause time to reverse momentarily making you remember the future. It therefore won?t be necessary to read your horrorscope this month, but you know this already.
 
Cancer June 22 - July 22

You will be offered the chance to make amends with everyone you've ever wronged, but the stars are putting good money on your deciding not to.

 
i win

Leo July 23 - August 22
Drinking is not the answer to your problems. However, since sex addiction is in fact the answer to all your problems, your lifestyle need not change.
 
Aries March 21 - April 19

It still seems that for every step forward, you take two to the side, three back, and then trip and fall off the side of a building, hitting the fire escape several times on the way down.

🙁
 
Capricorn December 22 - January 19

Your sudden and extreme maritime promotion can be traced less to competence and seamanship than to the tradition of captains going down with the ship.

....here comes the water......
 
Originally posted by: Anubis
Leo July 23 - August 22
Drinking is not the answer to your problems. However, since sex addiction is in fact the answer to all your problems, your lifestyle need not change.
Click to expand...

 
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