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Just found out news about my ex

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Originally posted by: thomsbrain
Originally posted by: vshah
force yourself to stop thinking about her

actively try to meet someone else

don't compare now to then.
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forcing yourself to stop thinking about something that bothers you is a recipe for disaster, dumbass. don't give advice about stuff you don't have the slightest fvcking clue about.

"forcing yourself to stop thinking about something" it is the NUMBER ONE root of most problems people eventually have to seek psychotherapy for. there are entire fields of psychology devoted to digging people out of the sh!tholes they dig themselves with repression. Freud discovering repression is what started psychology in the first place!

unless you like nightmares, depression, and $200/hour shrink bills, start facing the truth now. she's gone. you're still alive. you still have a future. you will fall in love again. it might take awhile. you'd do well to spend the time in between deciding why she left you (it might not have even been your fault!) and growing up a little, so that your next choice in partners works better for you.

and yes, i've been there. yes, it was hard. it can take years to get over a long-term relationship (i.e. years long). but i'm here to say, just be patient with yourself and with the world, and when you're ready and the world is ready for you, good things will happen again.
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hey, thomsbrain
seem like u're the only one who gave a more different approach this issue.
I've been bombarded pretty well on ATOT being called a whimp, loser, go kill myself,
move on, forget it, get laid, masturbate..

and then out of a sudden your post came outstanding!
 
Originally posted by: edmundoab
Best thing is, I am 10,000 miles away from me
and yes it has got better through the months.

but not subsiding as it should.

i get flash backs even when I drive, its freaking annoying sometimes.
but that happens off and on, not all the time
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Woa, I've had that very same thing happen, would be driving and swear I saw her over in the passenger seat as she was there for 14 years.

Thankfully that has not been happening for a while now.

1 Yr now for me that I was tossed in the trash.

Time does heal but don't expect perfect skin, there will always be a scar but scars are survivable.

Good luck
 
Originally posted by: richardycc
I've said it once in another thread, but I will say it again, repeat this in your head until you get it "If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, it's yours. If it doesn't, it never was."
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Funny, I've now had 2 Ex wives say that very saying.

 
Perhaps it is most practical to hear that saying.

Hmm, ok so looks like I am not the only one going through these flash backs.
Its so real sometimes like it happened yesterday.

 
Originally posted by: dmcowen674
Originally posted by: richardycc
I've said it once in another thread, but I will say it again, repeat this in your head until you get it "If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you, it's yours. If it doesn't, it never was."
Click to expand...

Funny, I've now had 2 Ex wives say that very saying.
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hehe, this is why I'm not getting married.
 
Originally posted by: tami
the best thing would be to try to avoid getting updates from your friends. it helps you move on when you don't talk about her.

i've been there, done that. i am still curious, but i don't ask. it hurts a lot less as time goes by.
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Yep, sadly I would say it helps to run away from the problem. 🙂
 
Originally posted by: pillage2001
He has masturbated, got laid and bla bla bla and things are still the same.........

Time to get a new gf in KL?
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hi pillage2001,
i thought I haven't seen you for a very long time on ATOT.
must be busy at Intel eh

yeah there you go. You read everything.
i know, I gotta find a proper girl in KL. Know what? she actually did call me to say hello just now.
but mention nothing much.

Just want to chat a little and update herself. Oh well. Given her plenty of chances to say something. I know i've asked enough times to clarify the situation

Speaking of collection. She is very supportive of my collection. I had contemplations to sell it before leaving the USA.
Then the said, "why would you spend so much time looking and buying cards when you have intentions to sell it in a short period of time. Isn't this your hobby?"

and so 45 cards flew to the otherside of the world along with me.
 
It will only hurt more to sit around thinking about it.

Get out, keep busy, meet new people, develop a new hobby....
Keep your chin up!
 
Originally posted by: edmundoab
Originally posted by: pillage2001
He has masturbated, got laid and bla bla bla and things are still the same.........

Time to get a new gf in KL?
Click to expand...

hi pillage2001,
i thought I haven't seen you for a very long time on ATOT.
must be busy at Intel eh

yeah there you go. You read everything.
i know, I gotta find a proper girl in KL. Know what? she actually did call me to say hello just now.
but mention nothing much.

Just want to chat a little and update herself. Oh well. Given her plenty of chances to say something. I know i've asked enough times to clarify the situation

Speaking of collection. She is very supportive of my collection. I had contemplations to sell it before leaving the USA.
Then the said, "why would you spend so much time looking and buying cards when you have intentions to sell it in a short period of time. Isn't this your hobby?"

and so 45 cards flew to the otherside of the world along with me.
Click to expand...

Busy?? More like pretending to be busy.

Anyway, alot of fishes in KL. Don't have to hunt for one that's too far. Easy to say hard to do but you have a distance there, making things easier to forget??
 
tell your friends to stfu. if they were really your friends, they would see that updates bother you and they wouldn't do it.
 
Originally posted by: pillage2001
Originally posted by: edmundoab
Originally posted by: pillage2001
He has masturbated, got laid and bla bla bla and things are still the same.........

Time to get a new gf in KL?
Click to expand...

hi pillage2001,
i thought I haven't seen you for a very long time on ATOT.
must be busy at Intel eh

yeah there you go. You read everything.
i know, I gotta find a proper girl in KL. Know what? she actually did call me to say hello just now.
but mention nothing much.

Just want to chat a little and update herself. Oh well. Given her plenty of chances to say something. I know i've asked enough times to clarify the situation

Speaking of collection. She is very supportive of my collection. I had contemplations to sell it before leaving the USA.
Then the said, "why would you spend so much time looking and buying cards when you have intentions to sell it in a short period of time. Isn't this your hobby?"

and so 45 cards flew to the otherside of the world along with me.
Click to expand...

Busy?? More like pretending to be busy.

Anyway, alot of fishes in KL. Don't have to hunt for one that's too far. Easy to say hard to do but you have a distance there, making things easier to forget??
Click to expand...

yeah, i'm pretty sure the next one to come in line won't get me into this kinda mess again. And definately easier to get dump or to dump 😀
 
Originally posted by: Red Dawn
Originally posted by: edmundoab
Best thing is, I am 10,000 miles away from me
and yes it has got better through the months.

but not subsiding as it should.
i get flash backs even when I drive, its freaking annoying sometimes.
but that happens off and on, not all the time
Click to expand...

Just don't try to think about some other guy giving her the high hard one on a nightly basis making her scream with ecstasy and you'll find that you will get over it much quicker.
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bwahahaha...red dawn you're one mean mofo 😀
 
Originally posted by: quakefiend420
Originally posted by: Red Dawn
Originally posted by: edmundoab
Best thing is, I am 10,000 miles away from me
and yes it has got better through the months.

but not subsiding as it should.
i get flash backs even when I drive, its freaking annoying sometimes.
but that happens off and on, not all the time
Click to expand...

Just don't try to think about some other guy giving her the high hard one on a nightly basis making her scream with ecstasy and you'll find that you will get over it much quicker.
Click to expand...

bwahahaha...red dawn you're one mean mofo 😀
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but he sure got a point there

 
Originally posted by: Doboji
Originally posted by: edmundoab
Originally posted by: Doboji
Your english.... it sucks...
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Off topic, but thanks for the feedback
oh btw, I remember you with that "Fiancee and I" picture.
was it about that WoW addiction and moving on with life?
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Yeap... still havent slid back into the WoW abyss... but it is looming ever so close.

Seriously though... where did you move to? and is english your first language?

-Max
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moved to malaysia, actually I am a malaysia but i've been in Kalamazoo for 4 years.
English is suppose to be a second language in this nation
but I've been using it to speak with my parents. So it is actually my mother tongue.

Sorry about the previous post and all the mistakes I make.
I seldom read what I type once more before replying to the forums.
I know its a bad habit.
then again there is always the "EDIT" button
 
there is a simple solution to your problem. NO CONTACT. don't call her, answer her calls, email, txt message, instant message, etc. there is a lot of truth to the saying, "out of sight, out of mind". i'm not saying repress all thought about her, but understand that it is over and that your time is done. figure out where things went wrong and what you could do better in your next relationship. try and stay positive, and do postiive things for yourself like working out. find new hobbies, immerse yourself in new activities so that you don't have time to dwell on your ex. and find a goddamn job while your at it. 🙂
 
Originally posted by: Sudheer Anne
there is a simple solution to your problem. NO CONTACT. don't call her, answer her calls, email, txt message, instant message, etc. there is a lot of truth to the saying, "out of sight, out of mind". i'm not saying repress all thought about her, but understand that it is over and that your time is done. figure out where things went wrong and what you could do better in your next relationship. try and stay positive, and do postiive things for yourself like working out. find new hobbies, immerse yourself in new activities so that you don't have time to dwell on your ex. and find a goddamn job while your at it. 🙂
Click to expand...

looks like you are about 2 months late with your advice

 
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