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Joke for The Late Night Crowd

Amused

Amused

Elite Member
There was a farmer, sitting on the front porch of his house this one hot
summer day, when this kid comes walking down the road carrying a big
bundle of wire.

'Hey kid!' the farmer says. 'Where ya goin' with that wire?'

'Well,' the kid drawls, 'this here ain't just any ol' wire, this here's
chicken wire -- I'm fixin' to catch me some chickens!'

'You can't catch chickens with chicken wire!'

'Sure I can!' the kid says, and takes off down the road. He comes back at
the end of the day and sure enough, he's got a whole mess of chickens
caught in his chicken wire.

Well, the farmer's sitting on his porch the next day, and the same kid
comes walking down the lane, carrying a big roll of tape.

'Hey kid!' the farmer yells. 'Where ya goin' with that tape?'

'Well, this here ain't just any ol' tape, this here's duck tape --I'm
fixin' to catch me some ducks!'

'You can't catch ducks with duck tape!' the farmer yells back.

'Sure I can!' the kid says, and takes off down the road.

He comes back at the end of the day and again, the farmer can't believe
his eyes. The kid had a whole bunch of ducks all wrapped up tightly in
his tape.


The next day the farmer's sitting on his porch again, and the kid comes
walking down the road carrying a stick.

'Hey kid!' the farmer says. 'Where ya goin' with that stick?'

'Well, this here ain't just any old stick, this here's pussy willow.'

'Hang on,' the farmer says. 'I'll get my hat.'
 
I've heard a variation on this joke before. My manager at work told it to me when I was in high school. I have to say I thought it was innapropriate for the work environment, but I laughed my ass off still.
 
I always thought it was DUCT tape.
Anyway,to add to the list.

A stern father was taking his little son Johnny for a walk in the park when a honeybee landed on a rock in front of them. The little boy stepped forward and crushed the bee with his shoe. The father said, "That was cruel, you'll get no honey for a whole year."

Later, Johnny deliberately stepped on a butterfly. "Just for that," his father said, "you'll have no butter for a year."

When they returned home, Johnny's mother was fixing dinner. As they walked into the kitchen, she spied a cockroach and immediately crushed it.
Johnny looked at his father impishly and asked, "Shall I tell her, Dad, or will you?"
 


<< I always thought it was DUCT tape.
Anyway,to add to the list.

A stern father was taking his little son Johnny for a walk in the park when a honeybee landed on a rock in front of them. The little boy stepped forward and crushed the bee with his shoe. The father said, "That was cruel, you'll get no honey for a whole year."

Later, Johnny deliberately stepped on a butterfly. "Just for that," his father said, "you'll have no butter for a year."

When they returned home, Johnny's mother was fixing dinner. As they walked into the kitchen, she spied a cockroach and immediately crushed it.
Johnny looked at his father impishly and asked, "Shall I tell her, Dad, or will you?" >>



or
When they returned home, the cat started rubbing against the father's leg, annoyed he kicks the cat across the room. Johnny looked at his father impishly and asked, "Shall I tell her, Dad, or will you?"
 
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