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jbourne77 wife consolation fail

S

Stuxnet

Diamond Member
So I'm multitasking this morning... trying to get some work done for a few clients, trying to get some grading done, trying to get some of my own school work done, AND chatting with the Mrs on MS Messenger. As we will see, this is way too much for my mortal mind to handle.

The Premise

My wife is in school, too, but doesn't have the luxury of working from home like I do. Therefore her time is much more constricted than mine. I can usually squeeze in an hour or so of exercise 4 or 5 days per week. She has put on a little weight over the past year or so. It's not outwardly apparent at all, but it's caused her to start snoring once in awhile.

The Fail

Mrs: I was snoring again last night. Did it wake you up?

Idiot: Not really. When you started, I had just gone to bed and just started to fall asleep. I really need to get to bed earlier.

... (misc conversation) ...

Mrs: If I wasn't such a fat cow, that wouldn't have happened.

Idiot: You are NOT a fat cow. Seriously.

... (the idiot is still multitasking, but the 1/9th of his brain that is dedicated to this conversation thinks "hey, let's try to solve this!")...

Idiot: Your eating is fine. You just don't have time to exercise.

/facepalm

The Aftermath

My wife is cool as hell. She doesn't get offended easily at all. But needless to say, this was a pretty stupid thing to say. It's like saying "yeah, you've put on a little weight, but we can fix it!" So the other 8/9th of my brain joined the conversation and spent 10 minutes doing damage control.

Moral of the story: Not every problem needs fixing. Some are just best left the hell alone. 🙁

/facebooktwittermyspaceblog

edit - apparently I also fail at fractions
 
eh i don't see anything wrong w/what you said at all, but from that little response it seems that your wife doesn't care she has gained weight.
 
Originally posted by: jbourne77
So I'm multitasking this morning... trying to get some work done for a few clients, trying to get some grading done, trying to get some of my own school work done, AND chatting with the Mrs on MS Messenger. As we will see, this is way too much for my mortal mind to handle.

The Premise

My wife is in school, too, but doesn't have the luxury of working from home like I do. Therefore her time is much more constricted than mine. I can usually squeeze in an hour or so of exercise 4 or 5 days per week. She has put on a little weight over the past year or so. It's not outwardly apparent at all, but it's caused her to start snoring once in awhile.

The Fail

Mrs: I was snoring again last night. Did it wake you up?

Idiot: Not really. When you started, I had just gone to bed and just started to fall asleep. I really need to get to bed earlier.

... (misc conversation) ...

Mrs: If I wasn't such a fat cow, that wouldn't have happened.

Idiot: You are NOT a fat cow. Seriously.

... (the idiot is still multitasking, but the 1/9th of his brain that is dedicated to this conversation thinks "hey, let's try to solve this!")...

Idiot: Your eating is fine. You just don't have time to exercise.

/facepalm

The Aftermath

My wife is cool as hell. She doesn't get offended easily at all. But needless to say, this was a pretty stupid thing to say. It's like saying "yeah, you've put on a little weight, but we can fix it!" So the other 8/9th of my brain joined the conversation and spent 10 minutes doing damage control.

Moral of the story: Not every problem needs fixing. Some are just best left the hell alone. 🙁

/facebooktwittermyspaceblog

edit - apparently I also fail at fractions
Click to expand...

At the age of 25 I've just realised this. Just nod and listen. DON'T give advice in some situations even though you can barely help offering some advice/ help.

Sometimes girls just don't want advice. Just someone to listen and to nod.

How did the damage control go?

Koing
 
Any woman who would be upset from that isn't worth the effort. Hmm, I guess that's why I am single right now because most do get upset from small things like that.
 
If it's not a problem, then your brain probably wouldn't be making comments like that.
If it is a problem, even slight, then it's better you tell her openly in a nice way (I know, it's like walking into a minefield), than having little slips in conversation like that.
 
Originally posted by: Blackjack200
How did your wife know she was snoring?
Click to expand...

She woke herself up (she's a very light sleeper, as am I)

Originally posted by: purbeast0
eh i don't see anything wrong w/what you said at all, but from that little response it seems that your wife doesn't care she has gained weight.
Click to expand...

She's certainly not obsessed with it, but she goes through phases when it bothers her. Our schedules are just so hectic that there's nothing she can really do about it. She eats VERY little, but she just doesn't have time to work out anymore.

If it weren't for the fact that my time was so flexible during the day, I'd likely be overweight, at least until we were both done with school.

Originally posted by: Koing
How did the damage control go?
Click to expand...

It was fine... she recognized the back peddling and assured me she wasn't offended, but I know my wife and she, like 99.9% of all women, is very sensitive about her weight.
 
Originally posted by: jbourne77
Originally posted by: Blackjack200
How did your wife know she was snoring?
Click to expand...

She woke herself up (she's a very light sleeper, as am I)

Originally posted by: purbeast0
eh i don't see anything wrong w/what you said at all, but from that little response it seems that your wife doesn't care she has gained weight.
Click to expand...

She's certainly not obsessed with it, but she goes through phases when it bothers her. Our schedules are just so hectic that there's nothing she can really do about it. She eats VERY little, but she just doesn't have time to work out anymore.

If it weren't for the fact that my time was so flexible during the day, I'd likely be overweight, at least until we were both done with school.
Click to expand...

if she is telling you these things every now and then, i bet you it bothers her more than you think it does. that is how women are. she is fishing for a response from you because it bothers her, but she wants to see if it bothers you as well.

also, and sorry to say it, but she obviously is eating more than she needs if she is gaining weight. so i find it hard to believe she is eating 'VERY little'.

if she is only eating 1 or 2 times a day since her time is so busy, that could be why she is gaining weight, because her metabolism has slowed to a crawl.
 
Hmmmm..go cycling with her on a Saturday in the morning? Just cycle at a nice easy pace for say 40-50mins this will be easy on the joints and a okay level of exercise to kick start things off.

You could do push ups and sit ups and skipping at home with her. The skipping would only be 5-8minutes TOPS mate. You can spare 5-8mins everyday to skip 30seconds on 30seconds off mate.

I can bet she's eating too much in the way of carbs also...people do not realise how much they eat until they keep a diary for 3 days. Coupled with the lack of exercise whilst in a typical office job/ study job thats not a good way to keep a trim bodyweight.

Koing
 
Originally posted by: jbourne77
So I'm multitasking this morning... trying to get some work done for a few clients, trying to get some grading done, trying to get some of my own school work done, AND chatting with the Mrs on MS Messenger. As we will see, this is way too much for my mortal mind to handle.

The Premise

My wife is in school, too, but doesn't have the luxury of working from home like I do. Therefore her time is much more constricted than mine. I can usually squeeze in an hour or so of exercise 4 or 5 days per week. She has put on a little weight over the past year or so. It's not outwardly apparent at all, but it's caused her to start snoring once in awhile.

The Fail

Mrs: I was snoring again last night. Did it wake you up?

Idiot: Not really. When you started, I had just gone to bed and just started to fall asleep. I really need to get to bed earlier.

... (misc conversation) ...

Mrs: If I wasn't such a fat cow, that wouldn't have happened.

Idiot: You are NOT a fat cow. Seriously.

... (the idiot is still multitasking, but the 1/9th of his brain that is dedicated to this conversation thinks "hey, let's try to solve this!")...

Idiot: Your eating is fine. You just don't have time to exercise.

/facepalm

The Aftermath

My wife is cool as hell. She doesn't get offended easily at all. But needless to say, this was a pretty stupid thing to say. It's like saying "yeah, you've put on a little weight, but we can fix it!" So the other 8/9th of my brain joined the conversation and spent 10 minutes doing damage control.

Moral of the story: Not every problem needs fixing. Some are just best left the hell alone. 🙁

/facebooktwittermyspaceblog

edit - apparently I also fail at fractions
Click to expand...

:laugh:

We men, our first instinct is to straightforwardly 'fix' things, but mostly, women just want to be heard. It's a subtle but important dynamic to learn!
 
Originally posted by: purbeast0
eh i don't see anything wrong w/what you said at all, but from that little response it seems that your wife doesn't care she has gained weight.
Click to expand...

I don't see anything wrong with what you said either, but I do think your wife was fishing. She should not get mad. The most annoying this is people looking for reassurance repeatedly. I don't have time for that bs.
 
Originally posted by: rh71
Originally posted by: purbeast0
eh i don't see anything wrong w/what you said at all, but from that little response it seems that your wife doesn't care she has gained weight.
Click to expand...

I don't see anything wrong with what you said either, but I do think your wife was fishing. She should not get mad. The most annoying this is people looking for reassurance repeatedly. I don't have time for that bs.
Click to expand...

And I strongly believe you misunderstand. Women just want to be heard on things like this, they just want to "vent". It is a MISTAKE to think they want some input from you and a bigger mistake to go ahead and give some.

 
Originally posted by: Koing
Hmmmm..go cycling with her on a Saturday in the morning? Just cycle at a nice easy pace for say 40-50mins this will be easy on the joints and a okay level of exercise to kick start things off.
Click to expand...

We actually bought her a bike a couple weeks ago. Since we can only ride as fast as our kids, it's not exactly exercise, but I suppose it's better than nothing!

Originally posted by: Perknose
We men, our first instinct is to straightforwardly 'fix' things, but mostly, women just want to be heard. It's a subtle but important dynamic to learn!
Click to expand...

This is a terrible habit of mine. We've been together for about 10 years now, and for years I couldn't get this through my thick skull. Maybe she's complaining about her friends, or her parents, or her sister, or her job, blah blah blah. Every response was "just do ... then it will be fine." Then she wouldn't do "...", and then a few weeks later, it's the same complaint. "Did you try ...?" We went mad going in circles.

So acknowledging this fundamental difference between men and women completely changed our marriage. But there's still the occasional slip-up like this one 😉 .
 
Originally posted by: Koing
Hmmmm..go cycling with her on a Saturday in the morning? Just cycle at a nice easy pace for say 40-50mins this will be easy on the joints and a okay level of exercise to kick start things off.
Click to expand...

We actually bought her a bike a couple weeks ago. Since we can only ride as fast as our kids, it's not exactly exercise, but I suppose it's better than nothing!

Originally posted by: Perknose
We men, our first instinct is to straightforwardly 'fix' things, but mostly, women just want to be heard. It's a subtle but important dynamic to learn!
Click to expand...

This is a terrible habit of mine. We've been together for about 10 years now, and for years I couldn't get this through my thick skull. Maybe she's complaining about her friends, or her parents, or her sister, or her job, blah blah blah. Every response was "just do ... then it will be fine." Then she wouldn't do "...", and then a few weeks later, it's the same complaint. "Did you try ...?" We went mad going in circles.

So acknowledging this fundamental difference between men and women completely changed our marriage. But there's still the occasional slip-up like this one 😉 .

You are correct: they do NOT want input. I don't ever recall a situation where INPUT was what was actually being requested.

Originally posted by: ivan2
give her the more cushion for pushing talk.
Click to expand...

I :laugh:'ed
 
Originally posted by: Perknose
Originally posted by: rh71
Originally posted by: purbeast0
eh i don't see anything wrong w/what you said at all, but from that little response it seems that your wife doesn't care she has gained weight.
Click to expand...

I don't see anything wrong with what you said either, but I do think your wife was fishing. She should not get mad. The most annoying this is people looking for reassurance repeatedly. I don't have time for that bs.
Click to expand...

And I strongly believe you misunderstand. Women just want to be heard on things like this, they just want to "vent". It is a MISTAKE to think they want some input from you and a bigger mistake to go ahead and give some.
Click to expand...

To be honest, this kind of thing by itself is annoying. My wife doesn't do that shit and I sincerely feel sorry for those who have to put up with it.
 
I see nothing wrong with what you said. At least your wife is willing to admit that her snoring is caused by weight gain.

My wife put on a few extra pounds and the snoring started. I told her it may be caused by the weight gain. She denied it and said "I think I have sleep apnea". I tell her I doubt it and she should go see a doctor if she thinks so.

So she does and they test her overnight. Doctor tells her she doesn't have sleep apnea and the snoring is most likely caused by her weight gain. 😀
 
Originally posted by: Red Dawn
I'm surprised you didn't Pepper Spray her.
Click to expand...

Pepper spray her? Over Messenger? Do you know something about the Internet that I don't?

Besides, we save that sort of thing for Kinky Tuesdays.
 
Originally posted by: KB
Any woman who would be upset from that isn't worth the effort. Hmm, I guess that's why I am single right now because most do get upset from small things like that.
Click to expand...

You think about it too much. They're just women...
 
Originally posted by: jbourne77
Originally posted by: Red Dawn
I'm surprised you didn't Pepper Spray her.
Click to expand...

Pepper spray her? Over Messenger? Do you know something about the Internet that I don't?

Besides, we save that sort of thing for Kinky Tuesdays.
Click to expand...

Have her meet you in the park.
 
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