Yes it is assigned to you but it is NOT your computer.
You did not shell out $4000 for the laptop, the memory upgrade, extra charger, extra battery, docking station, 19" monitor, and travel bag. Pay for it out of your own pocket and then you own it. Feel free to trash it however you want.
Since it is NOT your computer, you have no right to install your own personal software. I don't care if you want to use Quicken to balance your checkbook on the crapper. The company does not pay a bunch of techs to figure out why the bank didn't credit you that $2 coupon from Stop and Shop. Don't get pissed when I uninstall any software that is not COMPANY STANDARD.
You are SOL if you your personal software messes up your computer. You don't call the fire department when your cat pisses on the floor so don't call me when "MYST" corrupts your hard drive.
Yes that network card is great for the company network but it's property of the IT department and NOT you. So do not use it for DSL, Cable, or any other sort of home internet providor. If it hoses your company setting, you automatically goto the BOTTOM of the list. The help desk people can hardly handly daily volume without some moron being cheap and wanting to save a few bucks.
If you do have problems with you ISP, don't you dare call anyone on my team. Please don't get pissed at them just because they don't know the settings that some cable TV technician used. We pay lots of good money for help desk people that pick up in two rings. I don't care if @Home leaves you on hold for 2 hours. You pay $19.99 a month so expect that level of service.
Your computer/notebook is a work tool. It is assigned to you to make your more productive and NOT to show off to your friend and neighbors. It is your responsibilty to make sure it is safe at all time. We are not responsible for incedental damage caused due to:
Uncle Jed dropping it into a swimming pool.
Little Tammy using it for a frisbee.
Fido using it for a chew toy.
Big Aunt Bertha mistaking it for a Wheat Thin.
Leaving it on the front seat of you car when parked in a neighborhood that resembles downtown Beirut in 1985.
Should your PC meet it's demise from any of the above fashion, we are NOT authorized to assign you another PC within 30 minutes. You have already proven that you cannot be trusted with a computer. It is your problem if the replacement PC is a Speak N Spell since you had your chance with the nice PC and blew it.
I do not care if you do not like flat black. We do not buy PCs because they match you damn socks (That is for loser companies). The PC is for work and aesthetics doesn't matter. if you don't like the design, bitch to IBM and not me or my team.
A 6 - 10GB drive is more than enough for the average sales drone. I refuse to upgrade you to a 20GB hard drive simply because you want a place to store your MP3s and pr0n. Shell out your own money and put on your home PC. Did I mention you get one warning to take that stuff off your PC? I sure as hell don't want to be filling out the paperwork from HR after they can your sorry ass.
Rant over.
Windogg
You did not shell out $4000 for the laptop, the memory upgrade, extra charger, extra battery, docking station, 19" monitor, and travel bag. Pay for it out of your own pocket and then you own it. Feel free to trash it however you want.
Since it is NOT your computer, you have no right to install your own personal software. I don't care if you want to use Quicken to balance your checkbook on the crapper. The company does not pay a bunch of techs to figure out why the bank didn't credit you that $2 coupon from Stop and Shop. Don't get pissed when I uninstall any software that is not COMPANY STANDARD.
You are SOL if you your personal software messes up your computer. You don't call the fire department when your cat pisses on the floor so don't call me when "MYST" corrupts your hard drive.
Yes that network card is great for the company network but it's property of the IT department and NOT you. So do not use it for DSL, Cable, or any other sort of home internet providor. If it hoses your company setting, you automatically goto the BOTTOM of the list. The help desk people can hardly handly daily volume without some moron being cheap and wanting to save a few bucks.
If you do have problems with you ISP, don't you dare call anyone on my team. Please don't get pissed at them just because they don't know the settings that some cable TV technician used. We pay lots of good money for help desk people that pick up in two rings. I don't care if @Home leaves you on hold for 2 hours. You pay $19.99 a month so expect that level of service.
Your computer/notebook is a work tool. It is assigned to you to make your more productive and NOT to show off to your friend and neighbors. It is your responsibilty to make sure it is safe at all time. We are not responsible for incedental damage caused due to:
Uncle Jed dropping it into a swimming pool.
Little Tammy using it for a frisbee.
Fido using it for a chew toy.
Big Aunt Bertha mistaking it for a Wheat Thin.
Leaving it on the front seat of you car when parked in a neighborhood that resembles downtown Beirut in 1985.
Should your PC meet it's demise from any of the above fashion, we are NOT authorized to assign you another PC within 30 minutes. You have already proven that you cannot be trusted with a computer. It is your problem if the replacement PC is a Speak N Spell since you had your chance with the nice PC and blew it.
I do not care if you do not like flat black. We do not buy PCs because they match you damn socks (That is for loser companies). The PC is for work and aesthetics doesn't matter. if you don't like the design, bitch to IBM and not me or my team.
A 6 - 10GB drive is more than enough for the average sales drone. I refuse to upgrade you to a 20GB hard drive simply because you want a place to store your MP3s and pr0n. Shell out your own money and put on your home PC. Did I mention you get one warning to take that stuff off your PC? I sure as hell don't want to be filling out the paperwork from HR after they can your sorry ass.
Rant over.
Windogg
