Is Superman a virgin?

[Pray To Jesus]

cause when he ejaculates his sperm is coming out faster than a speeding bullet

and the sperm can fly and make holes in everything

 

[TangoJuliet]

"Only way he could bang regular chicks is with a Kryptonite condom, but that would kill him."


edit

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/an-oMNAbbu7thn4t/mallrats_1995_food_court_argument/

 

[Texashiker]

Years ago I saw a cartoon of superman whacking off, Lois was on her knees in front of him. When he finished, his sperm blasted holes in a brick wall.

Superman looked at Lois and said something like "do you still want to give me a blow job?"

 

[waggy]

yeah the DC universe say Wonder Women is the only women able to withstand his love...

 

[manimal]

I bet hulk could take it

 

[Fritzo]

There's a deleted scene in the movie Hancock dealing with that subject. He made swiss cheese out of the roof of his trailer

 

[Exterous]

I bet hulk could take it

'Yeah - you smash it....Oh smash it Hulk! Keep smashing it! SMASH HARDER!'

 

[SagaLore]

You're assuming that kryptonians have sperm just like humans and ejaculate at climax. For all you know a kryptonian climax could just be a slow drizzle containing a fluidic matrix of dna.

As Superman, I think it would be very difficult for him to have sex with anybody. It isn't just the superhuman strength and speed, it is also sensation. Does he even feel anything if he has sex with a human girl? Or does he need the grip of death with a diamond coated buckypaper glove... Think about this, if his genitals had human-level sensation, that would be a terrible Achilles heal for him during battles. Forget kryptonite, Lex could just kick him in the balls.

 

[rasczak]

You're assuming that kryptonians have sperm just like humans and ejaculate at climax. For all you know a kryptonian climax could just be a slow drizzle containing a fluidic matrix of dna.

As Superman, I think it would be very difficult for him to have sex with anybody. It isn't just the superhuman strength and speed, it is also sensation. Does he even feel anything if he has sex with a human girl? Or does he need the grip of death with a diamond coated buckypaper glove... Think about this, if his genitals had human-level sensation, that would be a terrible Achilles heal for him during battles. Forget kryptonite, Lex could just kick him in the balls.

Since he's an alien, does he even have a penis? Maybe that bump is just a super pimple? And how does he take a shit?

 

[preslove]

Kryptonians lay eggs.

 

[Pheran]

Written about a long time ago...

Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex

 

[Juddog]

The answer is that it would take someone of Wonder Woman calibre to hold his sperm. This is the basis of Project A-ko, the daughter of Superman and Wonder Woman.

 

[amdhunter]

I could take him.

 

[rasczak]

I could take him.

I bet you could. He would splooge your intestines out of your throat.

 

[KeithP]

cause when he ejaculates his sperm is coming out faster than a speeding bullet

and the sperm can fly and make holes in everything

He can walk at a normal speed, talk at a normal speed, breath at a normal speed why is the assumption made that his ejaculation would be moving so fast?

If that was the case, every time he crapped or pissed he would destroy a toilet.

-KeithP

 

[SagaLore]

Since he's an alien, does he even have a penis? Maybe that bump is just a super pimple? And how does he take a shit?

Yea he does, it is clear that he looks just like a human so he fits in. That is why he was sent here. FYI, for the version of Superman where he was strong since he landed as a child, we can assume he was never circumcised. So all the uncut here have their very own superhero.

 

[waggy]

also this is why they have supergirl. so he has someone to get the edge off!

 

[dave_the_nerd]

also this is why they have supergirl. so he has someone to get the edge off!

Dude... cousins...

 

[Jodell88]

Dude... cousins...

Not illegal if they're not first cousins.

 

[waggy]

Dude... cousins...

well he is from Kansas so its ok!


edit: and actually when he first introduced supergirl didn't clark "date" her? even though she was underage (like 15) and his cousin?

 

[preslove]

What about powergirl?

 

[Juddog]

What about powergirl?

Powergirl, Wonder Woman, Supergirl, all could take it, as could a bunch more superheroines on DC Earth.

 

[Juddog]

He can walk at a normal speed, talk at a normal speed, breath at a normal speed why is the assumption made that his ejaculation would be moving so fast?

If that was the case, every time he crapped or pissed he would destroy a toilet.

-KeithP

I don't believe that his body ejects waste in the normal fashion. Since his body metabolizes solar radiation he technically doesn't need to eat or drink at all. The times he does eat or drink, he can probably compress it down so far that it's the size of a droplet by the time it leaves (during the One Million saga, Superman One Million had the equivalent of an entire star's worth of gas inside of his lungs compressed down so super compression is easy).

 

[Atomic Playboy]

What about powergirl?

That sounds like an energy drink aimed at women.

 

[Skel]