Is it wrong to ask a girl...

[Sideswipe001]

To wear something for you? Not all the time, but occasionally. My girlfriend freaks out if I ever ask her to wear something specific and I just don't understand it at all. I mean, heck, if she asked me to wear something, I'd do it in a second; but I'm some manipulative bastard if I ask her to wear heels with her outfit on this big date we have planned.

Is there something wrong with that? Am I totally out of line for making a request like that?

 

[TMPadmin]

Yes! Never ask a woman to do anything. You have to make them think it was their idea.

 

[rudeguy]

yes its wrong to ask your girlfriend to dress up like Fire Marshall Bill

 

[Hoober]

Originally posted by: rudeguy
yes its wrong to ask your girlfriend to dress up like Fire Marshall Bill

Damn, and I was wondering why she was mad at me today.

 

[NogginBoink]

Nope, nothing wrong with it.

My fiancee will wear a special something for me when I ask.

 

[skace]

I don't know, but you should try it the way women do it to us.

"If you loved me you would....."

 

[MrMilney]

I can't see where there is anything wrong with asking her to wear something like heels, etc. It's not like you are demanding to pick her wardrobe for the week. You might want to draw the line somewhere this side of "can you wear this donkey costume and spank me in the restaurant?" though.

 

[Ranger X]

Communicate. Ask her why it makes her feel uncomfortable and tell her why it's important to you. If that doesn't work, tell her you're the man and that's just the way it's going to be.

 

[Lola]

Originally posted by: Sideswipe001
To wear something for you? Not all the time, but occasionally. My girlfriend freaks out if I ever ask her to wear something specific and I just don't understand it at all. I mean, heck, if she asked me to wear something, I'd do it in a second; but I'm some manipulative bastard if I ask her to wear heels with her outfit on this big date we have planned.

Is there something wrong with that? Am I totally out of line for making a request like that?

NO, i dont see it as wrong as long as you dont do it ALL the time. I would hope she would think thats ok... but if she finds it offensive, ask her that she chooses something for you and you choose something for her.
No, you are not out of line if it is something small like a skirt that she has that you like. If you want her to wear something that is almost an exact replica of something J.Lo or Brittany Spears wore at the VMA's then i would say you're giong too far.

 

[Finnkc]

bah I ask mine whatever I want ... if she objects then I just don't give up a fuss. You can never fully understand women and there emotions so I just go for broke. Sometimes it works to my advantage and ... well I am in the dog house.

 

[dquan97]

Nope, not at all. My wife even asks me what I'd like her to wear

 

[Hammer]

i don't think its wrong, i do it. hence it must be right.

 

[isekii]

Jsut be like "wow that really looks good on you"

she'll wear it more

 

[Sideswipe001]

Originally posted by: ActPrincess

Originally posted by: Sideswipe001
To wear something for you? Not all the time, but occasionally. My girlfriend freaks out if I ever ask her to wear something specific and I just don't understand it at all. I mean, heck, if she asked me to wear something, I'd do it in a second; but I'm some manipulative bastard if I ask her to wear heels with her outfit on this big date we have planned.

Is there something wrong with that? Am I totally out of line for making a request like that?

NO, i dont see it as wrong as long as you dont do it ALL the time. I would hope she would think thats ok... but if she finds it offensive, ask her that she chooses something for you and you choose something for her.
No, you are not out of line if it is something small like a skirt that she has that you like. If you want her to wear something that is almost an exact replica of something J.Lo or Brittany Spears wore at the VMA's then i would say you're giong too far.

Nothing like that. We are going on a formal date to see Les Mis in Atlanta, and I asked her to wear heels (practical ones - 4", nothing too big). What can I say, I like heels. What I get is an "why can't you love me the way I am and let me be myself and wear what I want" lecture, followed by a "If you loved me you'd let me be me." I don't get it. She says she wants to look nice for me, when I tell her what *my* opinion of something nice is...she freaks because she thinks they are uncomfortable (that's her reason for not wanting to wear them). So, basically she's pissed at me and I'm still trying to figure out where exactly I did something horribly wrong.

 

[Aharami]

Originally posted by: skace
I don't know, but you should try it the way women do it to us.

"If you loved me you would....."

hahaha...i gotta try that. but with my girl, she would always ask me what to wear when we are goin out...but i just show her what im wearing and tell her to wear whatever she wants....so if she feels slutty/too covered up/overdressed/underdressed/etc, she cant blame it on me

besides, she has soo many clothes that i cant really decide

 

[dolph]

damn, mine asks me all the time if there's anything i'd like her to wear.

 

[Lola]

Originally posted by: Sideswipe001

Originally posted by: ActPrincess

Originally posted by: Sideswipe001
To wear something for you? Not all the time, but occasionally. My girlfriend freaks out if I ever ask her to wear something specific and I just don't understand it at all. I mean, heck, if she asked me to wear something, I'd do it in a second; but I'm some manipulative bastard if I ask her to wear heels with her outfit on this big date we have planned.

Is there something wrong with that? Am I totally out of line for making a request like that?

NO, i dont see it as wrong as long as you dont do it ALL the time. I would hope she would think thats ok... but if she finds it offensive, ask her that she chooses something for you and you choose something for her.
No, you are not out of line if it is something small like a skirt that she has that you like. If you want her to wear something that is almost an exact replica of something J.Lo or Brittany Spears wore at the VMA's then i would say you're giong too far.

Nothing like that. We are going on a formal date to see Les Mis in Atlanta, and I asked her to wear heels (practical ones - 4", nothing too big). What can I say, I like heels. What I get is an "why can't you love me the way I am and let me be myself and wear what I want" lecture, followed by a "If you loved me you'd let me be me." I don't get it. She says she wants to look nice for me, when I tell her what *my* opinion of something nice is...she freaks because she thinks they are uncomfortable (that's her reason for not wanting to wear them). So, basically she's pissed at me and I'm still trying to figure out where exactly I did something horribly wrong.

I see. I guess there is really nothing to reply to that. If comfort is an issue, i would just let it be, but as someone said, just tell her that she looks great no matter what, but she looks extra sexy in heels! Can you compromise by saying that if comfort is an issue, we can get valet instead of walking... or something along those lines?

 

[Ticks]

Yes its ok, escpecially if its a cheerleading outfit she never gave back from her college. Thats just hypothetical though

 

[rh71]

When I do that, she often objects but she eventually changes her ways (like a week later)... so as to not make it appear I made (commanded) her to do it... it works out in the end for the both of us so I'm not complaining. But no, they don't take that kind of hit to their "tastes" very easily.

 

[Sideswipe001]

Nothing like that. We are going on a formal date to see Les Mis in Atlanta, and I asked her to wear heels (practical ones - 4", nothing too big). What can I say, I like heels. What I get is an "why can't you love me the way I am and let me be myself and wear what I want" lecture, followed by a "If you loved me you'd let me be me." I don't get it. She says she wants to look nice for me, when I tell her what *my* opinion of something nice is...she freaks because she thinks they are uncomfortable (that's her reason for not wanting to wear them). So, basically she's pissed at me and I'm still trying to figure out where exactly I did something horribly wrong.[/quote]

I see. I guess there is really nothing to reply to that. If comfort is an issue, i would just let it be, but as someone said, just tell her that she looks great no matter what, but she looks extra sexy in heels! Can you compromise by saying that if comfort is an issue, we can get valet instead of walking... or something along those lines?[/quote]

Tried. Apparently the walk from the car to the restaurant and back, and then from the car to the theatre and back is too long. The sad thing was she went and bought these other shoes, and when she showed them to me, she was upset because I wasn't excited about them. I mean...yes, I didn't handle that as well as I should of...I was a bit too blunt...but still. She wants me to be honest, and then doesn't like it when I am.

 

[Lola]

Originally posted by: Sideswipe001
Nothing like that. We are going on a formal date to see Les Mis in Atlanta, and I asked her to wear heels (practical ones - 4", nothing too big). What can I say, I like heels. What I get is an "why can't you love me the way I am and let me be myself and wear what I want" lecture, followed by a "If you loved me you'd let me be me." I don't get it. She says she wants to look nice for me, when I tell her what *my* opinion of something nice is...she freaks because she thinks they are uncomfortable (that's her reason for not wanting to wear them). So, basically she's pissed at me and I'm still trying to figure out where exactly I did something horribly wrong.

I see. I guess there is really nothing to reply to that. If comfort is an issue, i would just let it be, but as someone said, just tell her that she looks great no matter what, but she looks extra sexy in heels! Can you compromise by saying that if comfort is an issue, we can get valet instead of walking... or something along those lines?[/quote]

Tried. Apparently the walk from the car to the restaurant and back, and then from the car to the theatre and back is too long. The sad thing was she went and bought these other shoes, and when she showed them to me, she was upset because I wasn't excited about them. I mean...yes, I didn't handle that as well as I should of...I was a bit too blunt...but still. She wants me to be honest, and then doesn't like it when I am.[/quote]


Welcome to the interworkings of the female mind! That senario you just described has been done tons of times by unsuspecting, loving, honest boyfriends all over the world. There is nothing to do this time!
hey, next time, YOU go shopping and get her some pretty shoes and give them to her. That way she will feel special that you thought of her, and you can choose the kind you like. If she dosent like them then... i am out of ideas!

 

[Sideswipe001]

Thanks for trying to help anyway.

 

[slackerinabox]

You gotta ASK and not TELL or beg.. And NEVER be to specific.. Like "Honey, I heard great things about this restaurant... We should dress up a bit, right?" If that leads to a "what should I wear?" then say something like "I always thought you looked amazing in [FILL IN THE BLANK]".. if she doesn't ask then just pause a bit like you're thinking and then say the same thing... Don't demand anything and don't beg.. If you can't get your way subtely then just drop it and move on...

 

[Koing]

Nothing wrong with that.

I ask my gf to wear certain clothes and heels. She is fine with it.

Koing

 

[ElFenix]

Originally posted by: Hammer
i don't think its wrong, i do it. hence it must be right.

you wear high heels on dates :Q