Is it okay to spank your child?

[PlatinumGold]

Originally posted by: CollectiveUnconscious

Originally posted by: AbAbber2k

Originally posted by: CollectiveUnconscious
No no no no and NO. There are numerous studies that indicate that spanking is harmful to the development of the child.

Um, I believe most studies done on spanking are flawed because they typically only compare high rates of spanking versus no spanking at all. Obviously spanking your children every/every other day of their young life is going to have detrimental effects. However, studies that compared no use of corporal punishment with low and high (1-30ish times a year vs 120+ times a year) show that children who receive minimal corporal punishment do better than those who receive none or excessive amounts.

Spanking is only effective when it is employed rarely and always immediately after the child has done something wrong. Excessive use or excessive threats of corporal punishment only encourage bad behavior. The best thing to do is reserve spanking for SERIOUS infractions and use mild warnings/punishments to deter poor behavior in general (social psychological studies show that the significant threats are less effective than minor threats, ie: tell a child you'll be unhappy if he does something versus threating to spank a child if he does something).

That said, I don't know if I'll spank my children. My mother was the only one to spank me, and it was RARE... only if I really fvcked up. My dad never laid a hand on me, except once I think, and I sure as hell deserved it.

While you are correct in saying that minimal use of physical punishment does not facilitate detrimental behavior, you are incorrect in saying it is more effective than non-physical alternatives. Multiple studies comparing the two types of punishment found that they were equal in effectiveness.

way to backtrack.

either you just contradicted yourself. or your first post was pointless.

can some forms of excessive spanking be harmful? of course, who doesn't know that. can some forms of non spanking discipline be harmful? of course. can NO discipline be harmful? an unqualified yes.

so a statement such as

Yes yes yes ande YES. There are numerous studies that indicate other forms of discipline is harmful to the development of the child

has equal merit and value to the statement you made above.

fact is, spanking or not is a personal decision and done sparingly (i personally have never spanked any of my 3 children more than 2 or 3 times a year and it's always a fingerflick to the forehead that i use) believe me when they tear up, it's not because of the pain of the fingerflick but because they understand that it is an extreme form of disapproval that i rarely employ.

for you to make ridiculous statements implying that all forms of spanking are harmful to the child is ridiculous.

 

[Alex]

i was spanked as a kid and i don't have any hard feelings...

i think sometimes its necessary to smack your kids around just to kinda keep them guessing!

 

[PlatinumGold]

Originally posted by: dman
I don't know that it's bad long term if done not out of anger, but, IMO, it's a crutch due to reactive parenting and there are better methods of teaching children.

what's wrong with reactive parenting? only the biggest of fools thinks that a parent can prepare their child for EVERY situation. proactive is great for many things, but life isn't always so predictable. there are many times when parents DO have to react to situations and punish their child accordingly.

i love how you throw around the word reactive as if that automatically makes it a bad thing. :roll:

 

[bucwylde23]

Voted yes.

I don't think parents should spank kids publically, or just hit them out of frustration like someone said previously.

But I see so many kids today that aren't spanked and do whatever they want. It's pretty obvious that nowadays when spanking seems to be looked down upon, kids' behavior is getting much worse.

I see kids on a regular basis who run all over their parents and are out of control. Once they realize if they don't listen they will get a good spanking, they will behave really quickly.