Is it OK for a friend to date your ex?

[MaxDepth]

you should only be mad if she gave it up easier or better to him than you...

 

[Jzero]

the thing is, if he thought i would have a problem with it, then its even more important for him to at least let me know or give me a head's up on what's happening or what he plans to do....

Sorry, next time I'll ask your permission before I date some girl.

Think about what you're saying.
He doesn't answer to you and neither does she. This is a two-way street. You could have confronted him about it just as easily as he could have.

 

[OhZyeah]

Originally posted by: Jzero

the thing is, if he thought i would have a problem with it, then its even more important for him to at least let me know or give me a head's up on what's happening or what he plans to do....

Sorry, next time I'll ask your permission before I date some girl.

Think about what you're saying.
He doesn't answer to you and neither does she. This is a two-way street. You could have confronted him about it just as easily as he could have.

I'm not saying for him to ask....the problem with this situation is that he acted shady about it, and that's why I won't confort him about it b/c it is not worth my time. So you're saying that your close friend can date your ex and try to "hide" and "avoid" it from you, and you would feel OK about it?
Well, if that's where you stand, than start thinking about what "true" friends are and stand for...

i just know I would never act the way he did, shady and trying to hide it from any of my friends...a man's actions tells a lot about a man's character..nuff said!

 

[captains]

its fine to date and ex but the part about him avoiding u is not right. F him, if he couldnt chill with u cuz he was datin your ex then he aint worth the time to be one of the boyz

 

[Jzero]

Originally posted by: OhZyeah

Originally posted by: Jzero

the thing is, if he thought i would have a problem with it, then its even more important for him to at least let me know or give me a head's up on what's happening or what he plans to do....

Sorry, next time I'll ask your permission before I date some girl.

Think about what you're saying.
He doesn't answer to you and neither does she. This is a two-way street. You could have confronted him about it just as easily as he could have.

I'm not saying for him to ask....the problem with this situation is that he acted shady about it, and that's why I won't confort him about it b/c it is not worth my time. So you're saying that your close friend can date your ex and try to "hide" and "avoid" it from you, and you would feel OK about it?
Well, if that's where you stand, than start thinking about what "true" friends are and stand for...

If in order to be someone's "true" friend means I have to expose to them every aspect of my private life, then I'm more than happy not to have any or be anyone's so-called "true friend."

I had a close friend date one of my exes. He didn't tell me. He wasn't required to tell me. I broke up with her. She's fair game. Maybe he didn't tell me b/c he thought I'd be upset. Judging by a lot of people's responses here, that wouldn't be such a far-fetched idea. I didn't hold it against him. It's his business. He's under no obligation to tell me where he takes a sh!t, even if it's in the bathroom of my old house.

You say you won't confront him b/c it's not worth your time, but your over here on ATOT harping about it....

 

[mjquilly]

Isn't this the 8th Commandment?

Thou Shall not git wit thy homie's biotches

 

[captains]

Originally posted by: mjquilly
Isn't this the 8th Commandment?

Thou Shall not git wit thy homie's biotches

hahhahahaha

 

[2002R1Rider]

Why would they want to????

 

[dirtboy]

No, unless you don't care and said it wask okay.

 

[OhZyeah]

Originally posted by: Jzero

Originally posted by: OhZyeah

Originally posted by: Jzero

the thing is, if he thought i would have a problem with it, then its even more important for him to at least let me know or give me a head's up on what's happening or what he plans to do....

Sorry, next time I'll ask your permission before I date some girl.

Think about what you're saying.
He doesn't answer to you and neither does she. This is a two-way street. You could have confronted him about it just as easily as he could have.

I'm not saying for him to ask....the problem with this situation is that he acted shady about it, and that's why I won't confort him about it b/c it is not worth my time. So you're saying that your close friend can date your ex and try to "hide" and "avoid" it from you, and you would feel OK about it?
Well, if that's where you stand, than start thinking about what "true" friends are and stand for...

If in order to be someone's "true" friend means I have to expose to them every aspect of my private life, then I'm more than happy not to have any or be anyone's so-called "true friend."

I had a close friend date one of my exes. He didn't tell me. He wasn't required to tell me. I broke up with her. She's fair game. Maybe he didn't tell me b/c he thought I'd be upset. Judging by a lot of people's responses here, that wouldn't be such a far-fetched idea. I didn't hold it against him. It's his business. He's under no obligation to tell me where he takes a sh!t, even if it's in the bathroom of my old house.

You say you won't confront him b/c it's not worth your time, but your over here on ATOT harping about it....

Yea, in the beginning, I was concerned about our friendship, but since the responses to this thread, I am now more positive that the "friendship" is not worth my time. I don't need someone like that who's suppose to be a "homie" and do that to me, be worth my time. Plus, I agree its not my business who he see/dates, but if u had read the OP more carefully, i'm pissed at him trying to hide it, avoid it, acting all shady, than him actually dating my ex. I seriously could care less if peeps dated my ex. I have no feelings for her so anybody can date her....its just the way he went about dating her 'behind" my back.

Also, you still haven't answered my question. Would you be OK if your friend acted shady and try to hide that he was dating your ex? You said it happened to you, so are you and this guy still friends? Was he acting shady and trying to avoid you when they were dating?

BTW..i think your defintion of a true friend is totally off....ask around and peeps will tell you the same thing....you DO NOT have to expose every aspect of your life to someone for him/her to be a true friend....

 

[Jzero]

but if u had read the OP more carefully, i'm pissed at him trying to hide it, avoid it, acting all shady, than him actually dating my ex. I seriously could care less if peeps dated my ex. I have no feelings for her so anybody can date her....its just the way he went about dating her 'behind" my back.

Did he really hide it and avoid you, or were you just growing apart? I talk to very few of my high school friends these days.

Also, you still haven't answered my question. Would you be OK if your friend acted shady and try to hide that he was dating your ex? You said it happened to you, so are you and this guy still friends? Was he acting shady and trying to avoid you when they were dating?

He didn't hide it per se, but he never came out with it. We're not still friends, but it wasn't related to them dating. We went to different colleges and just saw less and less of each other.

BTW..i think your defintion of a true friend is totally off....ask around and peeps will tell you the same thing....you DO NOT have to expose every aspect of your life to someone for him/her to be a true friend....

Then I will choose which aspects I do not reveal, and if I don't want to tell my friend who I'm dating, I'm at liberty to do so. Therefore, I won't hold it against anyone who does the same to me.

 

[OhZyeah]

Originally posted by: Jzero

but if u had read the OP more carefully, i'm pissed at him trying to hide it, avoid it, acting all shady, than him actually dating my ex. I seriously could care less if peeps dated my ex. I have no feelings for her so anybody can date her....its just the way he went about dating her 'behind" my back.

Did he really hide it and avoid you, or were you just growing apart? I talk to very few of my high school friends these days.

Also, you still haven't answered my question. Would you be OK if your friend acted shady and try to hide that he was dating your ex? You said it happened to you, so are you and this guy still friends? Was he acting shady and trying to avoid you when they were dating?

He didn't hide it per se, but he never came out with it. We're not still friends, but it wasn't related to them dating. We went to different colleges and just saw less and less of each other.

BTW..i think your defintion of a true friend is totally off....ask around and peeps will tell you the same thing....you DO NOT have to expose every aspect of your life to someone for him/her to be a true friend....

Then I will choose which aspects I do not reveal, and if I don't want to tell my friend who I'm dating, I'm at liberty to do so. Therefore, I won't hold it against anyone who does the same to me.

No we were not growing apart..although we went to different colleges, we were only an hour from each other (Los Angeles).....the thing is that b4 he started dating my ex, we would meet up with my other buddies and all kick it together.....i mean we dont talk on the phone daily, but more like once in awhile, maybe monthly.....however since he started dating her, i noticed he would avoid meeting me...even when its with a big group of our close friends.....and when we bump to each other in LA, it was awkward b/c he had nothing relevant to say to me....it was the old 'how u been" routine....and my reasoning for this is he knew it was wrong and was embarrased/ashamed perhaps to bring it up.....

and yes, i still see all of my high school friends....we all ended coming moving to south cali to live/work...he's still in LA but does not talk to any one of us anymore....(again, perhaps he's too ashamed?)

Ok, with your friend, you guys saw less of each other, but could it be your sub-conscience and maybe his didn't make an effort to see each other b/c of your ex?

Ok, you are at liberty to tell/not tell your friends who you date? But what is your definition of a "true" friend than?

 

[EMPshockwave82]

no... dont be pissed at him.. and if he IS a friend of yours.. or was before everything, then i dont see why you cant be the big man about this, give him a call and be like "hey man, lets go to the bars and get a few beers"

 

[alm4rr]

NEEDS POLL

 

[OhZyeah]

Originally posted by: EMPshockwave82
no... dont be pissed at him.. and if he IS a friend of yours.. or was before everything, then i dont see why you cant be the big man about this, give him a call and be like "hey man, lets go to the bars and get a few beers"

yea, alot of times i wanted to do that, but its just always gonna be in the back of my mind that he acted shady toward me.....this is a total cliche, but i do beleive in "you can forgive, but never forget"....
I just don't know how I will be able to kcik it with him like b4 all this happened..it just won't be the same.....even when i bump into him at bars/clubs in LA, we give each other a "wassup" nod....very artificial and fake, u know....

or why can't he be the big man, and call me up and explain to me WTF he was thinking back then...

 

[BillyBatson]

NO!!!!!
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!!!!!!!

Ok if a friend dated someoen i went out with for 2 weeks I could care less.

Now if even my best friend who I consider my own brother and would do anything for dated my FORMER (less negative) GF Ashley, yeah sorry I honestly would probably kill him.

 

[cheapgoose]

yes, as long as they don't have sex.

j/k, of course not!

 

[wizardbud]

(Keep in mind, I do not give a fawk about my ex, she is a slut. I grew up wiith my friend and was wondering if its a waste to throw the friendship away over a dumb ass girl)

If either one of them has any sense they would drop you like the diseased rodent that you are.
You are the one with the problem.

A: She's your ex but she's a slut. (She had to be if she was sleeping with you.)
B: She's a dumb ass girl. (And I bet your a regular Rhodes scholar.)
C: I grew up with my friend. (But you don't mind him dating a dumb ass slut)

I'm surprised that you have any friends with this kind of attitude.
Grow the hell up.

 

[OhZyeah]

Originally posted by: wizardbud
(Keep in mind, I do not give a fawk about my ex, she is a slut. I grew up wiith my friend and was wondering if its a waste to throw the friendship away over a dumb ass girl)

If either one of them has any sense they would drop you like the diseased rodent that you are.
You are the one with the problem.

A: She's your ex but she's a slut. (She had to be if she was sleeping with you.)
B: She's a dumb ass girl. (And I bet your a regular Rhodes scholar.)
C: I grew up with my friend. (But you don't mind him dating a dumb ass slut)

I'm surprised that you have any friends with this kind of attitude.
Grow the hell up.

Stoopid ass, read OP...
the problem is the way my friend acted, not my ex...
damn, seriosuly, WizardBud, pay more attention to the thread and what others have responded b4 you response your very own "diseased" opinion...fawk...hate it when peeps think they're right when in fact, they don't know what the fawk they are talking about.

 

[OhZyeah]

Originally posted by: BillyBatson
NO!!!!!
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!!!!!!!

Ok if a friend dated someoen i went out with for 2 weeks I could care less.

Now if even my best friend who I consider my own brother and would do anything for dated my FORMER (less negative) GF Ashley, yeah sorry I honestly would probably kill him.

tell it to Wizardbud....
he seems to be confused about the whole thread

 

[Jzero]

No we were not growing apart..although we went to different colleges, we were only an hour from each other (Los Angeles).....the thing is that b4 he started dating my ex, we would meet up with my other buddies and all kick it together.....i mean we dont talk on the phone daily, but more like once in awhile, maybe monthly.....however since he started dating her, i noticed he would avoid meeting me...even when its with a big group of our close friends.....and when we bump to each other in LA, it was awkward b/c he had nothing relevant to say to me....it was the old 'how u been" routine....and my reasoning for this is he knew it was wrong and was embarrased/ashamed perhaps to bring it up.....

Could be, but we'll never really know without his side of the story.

Ok, with your friend, you guys saw less of each other, but could it be your sub-conscience and maybe his didn't make an effort to see each other b/c of your ex?

Nah, it didn't have anything to do with my subconscious. He was living at home, working at Today's Man, taking night classes in Philly. I was living at school, didn't have a car and rarely went home. I lost touch with just about all of those people.

Ok, you are at liberty to tell/not tell your friends who you date? But what is your definition of a "true" friend than?

There's no formula, but for one thing a true friend to me doesn't bogart women he's already "done" with. He had his chance, couldn't close the deal, it's time to move on and not get in a huff if someone else takes a shot, whether they tell him about it or not.

 

[jdogg]

Originally posted by: OhZyeah

Originally posted by: conjur
Bros befo hos.

Exactly, but he didn't follow that rule.

and how didn't he follow the rule? ... if you really didn't give two sh_ts about her, who cares if he dates her?? ... now him being shaddy about doing it ... i can see you holding something against him for doing that ... but no other reason ... just talk to him and tell him you didn't appreciate him being shaddy about it

 

[Geekbabe]

hell,I offered rewards to any woman brave or crazy enough to hook up with mine

 

[Gnurb]

i think it depends how hot she is.

pics?

 

im dating my best friends ex right now. Of course, I asked him before we did anything, and they only dating for 3 months. I waited about a year to date her. He said it was cool cause he dumped her, thus having nso feelings for her. Perhaps you still have feelings for your ex?