Is it OK for a friend to date your ex?

[OhZyeah]

Originally posted by: TuffGuy

Originally posted by: OhZyeah

Originally posted by: minendo
Who cares? You are not dating her, so why the hell do you care who or what she does?

I don't care who she dates or who she sees...but I do care more about my friend and I and our friendship. keep in mind, i looked to him as a 'homie" since we grew up together. I'm asking if I should forgive him for doing that, even tho he acted shady.

cuz he knew you'd be pissed. and apparently he was right.

i'll ask you a question. what if he genuinely liked this girl? if you really cared about your friend you would want him to be happy.

not only that, but he dated her a year or two AFTER you guys broke up. he probably knew that you wouldn't be happy, but if you're over her as you claim, why would you care who she dates? and if you're not secretly in love with him, why would you care who he dates?

Actually i'm not pissed that he dated her, i'm pissed that he had to hide it from me. Don't get me wrong, I was totally over the girl when he dated her, but just the thought that he felt he had to sneak around, avoid me, and hide it from me made me sorta pissed at him.....

even now, we don't even kick it or talk....and when i talk to my other friends who were also friends with him, they all say teh same thing, that he was shady and all, and not worth my time....

i do want to resolve it somehow, cuz i know i will bump into him in the future and it will be awkward...he sorta knows that i'm pissed at him but he won't come out and say anything about it....even after their "relationship" ended, he still avoids me and sheit...

 

[gopunk]

Originally posted by: OhZyeah

Originally posted by: TuffGuy

Originally posted by: OhZyeah

Originally posted by: minendo
Who cares? You are not dating her, so why the hell do you care who or what she does?

I don't care who she dates or who she sees...but I do care more about my friend and I and our friendship. keep in mind, i looked to him as a 'homie" since we grew up together. I'm asking if I should forgive him for doing that, even tho he acted shady.

cuz he knew you'd be pissed. and apparently he was right.

i'll ask you a question. what if he genuinely liked this girl? if you really cared about your friend you would want him to be happy.

not only that, but he dated her a year or two AFTER you guys broke up. he probably knew that you wouldn't be happy, but if you're over her as you claim, why would you care who she dates? and if you're not secretly in love with him, why would you care who he dates?

Actually i'm not pissed that he dated her, i'm pissed that he had to hide it from me. Don't get me wrong, I was totally over the girl when he dated her, but just the thought that he felt he had to sneak around, avoid me, and hide it from me made me sorta pissed at him.....

even now, we don't even kick it or talk....and when i talk to my other friends who were also friends with him, they all say teh same thing, that he was shady and all, and not worth my time....

i do want to resolve it somehow, cuz i know i will bump into him in the future and it will be awkward...he sorta knows that i'm pissed at him but he won't come out and say anything about it....even after their "relationship" ended, he still avoids me and sheit...

i'm sorry but this whole thing is really girly if you ask me... so he didn't know how you would react, big deal... just get over it. even if he did do something wrong, everybody makes mistakes, go to a football game together and act as if nothing happened.

 

[rgwalt]

It is OK, especially since you dumped her. However, he should have told you that he was going to ask her out. Those are the rules.

R

 

[OhZyeah]

Originally posted by: rgwalt
It is OK, especially since you dumped her. However, he should have told you that he was going to ask her out. Those are the rules.

Thankyou. My thought exactly.

 

[upsciLLion]

It's pretty subjective and individual, but I don't date in the circle of friends. Nor do I date girls that seriously dated any of my friends. Sure, they're fair game if they're single, but it's asking for trouble. Bros before hoes indeed.

ups

 

[OhZyeah]

Originally posted by: upsciLLion
It's pretty subjective and individual, but I don't date in the circle of friends. Nor do I date girls that seriously dated any of my friends. Sure, they're fair game if they're single, but it's asking for trouble. Bros before hoes indeed.

ups

Again, my thought exactly! Never date within circle of friends!

 

[SoylentGreen]

I know people that married a friends ex hoochie.

Actually, my good friend was like number 3 in the group of friends and 4 married her.

Guess he didn't care she was passed around like a sack of potatos.

 

[OhZyeah]

Originally posted by: Kiyup
I know people that married a friends ex hoochie.

Actually, my good friend was like number 3 in the group of friends and 4 married her.

Guess he didn't care she was passed around like a sack of potatos.

dood, that's just wrong....imagine, he's not even getting sloppy seconds, but sloppy fourths..uggggghhhh

damn, i feel bad for the wife..hahahah, u think they all share stories about her..hahahah

 

[minendo]

Originally posted by: OhZyeah

Originally posted by: Kiyup
I know people that married a friends ex hoochie.

Actually, my good friend was like number 3 in the group of friends and 4 married her.

Guess he didn't care she was passed around like a sack of potatos.

dood, that's just wrong....imagine, he's not even getting sloppy seconds, but sloppy fourths..uggggghhhh

damn, i feel bad for the wife..hahahah, u think they all share stories about her..hahahah

So I take it you plan to marry a virgin?

 

[Aharami]

No, its not ok

 

[lokiju]

Originally posted by: OhZyeah

Originally posted by: cloude27
I dont think you should toss your friendship a way... you should atleast talk to him

But didn't he toss the friendship away by going behind me and acting all shady...
the question is why should i be accepting of him if he did that to me.?

If you were away when this happened, then maybe he didn't wanna bring up a sore subject with you since you two are friends. He probally figured it would be eaiser to go this route rather than pissing off a friend (you) who isn't even around.

Just my 2 cents, doesn't mean what he did was right, just might be his view on the whole thing.

 

[NightRaven]

"Graduated HS, went to college and dumped her ass"

What an imature thing to say... Sicne you disrespect her in this manner, you dont have any right to care about who dates her...

 

[OhZyeah]

Originally posted by: NightRaven
"Graduated HS, went to college and dumped her ass"

What an imature thing to say... Sicne you disrespect her in this manner, you dont have any right to care about who dates her...

i don't care who dates her,......read OP , duh!
I care about that my friend went behing my back to date her...the way he went about in dating her (avoiding me, behind my back) this thread is about should i save a friendship or not....not a thread about my ex...

 

[OhZyeah]

Originally posted by: minendo

Originally posted by: OhZyeah

Originally posted by: Kiyup
I know people that married a friends ex hoochie.

Actually, my good friend was like number 3 in the group of friends and 4 married her.

Guess he didn't care she was passed around like a sack of potatos.

dood, that's just wrong....imagine, he's not even getting sloppy seconds, but sloppy fourths..uggggghhhh

damn, i feel bad for the wife..hahahah, u think they all share stories about her..hahahah

So I take it you plan to marry a virgin?

no, but i would never marry a girl who's dated 3 of my friends....

 

[minendo]

Originally posted by: OhZyeah

Originally posted by: minendo

Originally posted by: OhZyeah

Originally posted by: Kiyup
I know people that married a friends ex hoochie.

Actually, my good friend was like number 3 in the group of friends and 4 married her.

Guess he didn't care she was passed around like a sack of potatos.

dood, that's just wrong....imagine, he's not even getting sloppy seconds, but sloppy fourths..uggggghhhh

damn, i feel bad for the wife..hahahah, u think they all share stories about her..hahahah

So I take it you plan to marry a virgin?

no, but i would never marry a girl who's dated 3 of my friends....

What difference is it if she slept with three of your friends or three random guys?

 

[hjo3]

Obligatory Simpsons quote:

You wanna talk? How about we talk about Lou dating my ex-wife.
I thought the divorce was final.
When is a divorce ever final?

 

[VictorLazlo]

The rule is: Yes, it is ok for a friend to date your ex...IF he asks your permission first.

However, from personal experience I feel it is better not to, even if the guy says you can.
I had a friend who said I could date his ex. I decided not to, and later I found out that it would have spoiled our friendship if I had done it.

 

As long as they let me hit it one more time while they give the money shot.

 

[OhZyeah]

Originally posted by: minendo

Originally posted by: OhZyeah

Originally posted by: minendo

Originally posted by: OhZyeah

Originally posted by: Kiyup
I know people that married a friends ex hoochie.

Actually, my good friend was like number 3 in the group of friends and 4 married her.

Guess he didn't care she was passed around like a sack of potatos.

dood, that's just wrong....imagine, he's not even getting sloppy seconds, but sloppy fourths..uggggghhhh

damn, i feel bad for the wife..hahahah, u think they all share stories about her..hahahah

So I take it you plan to marry a virgin?

no, but i would never marry a girl who's dated 3 of my friends....

What difference is it if she slept with three of your friends or three random guys?

B/C at least you dont know who those 3 random guys are....with 3 of your friends, it's just "too close for comfort" u know...

it can go both ways also.....i'm assuming you're a female, ....would you marry a guy who's slept with 3 of your close girlfriends? You may say its not a problem now, but talking the talk, and walking the walk is different....

 

[minendo]

Originally posted by: OhZyeah

Originally posted by: minendo

Originally posted by: OhZyeah

Originally posted by: minendo

Originally posted by: OhZyeah

Originally posted by: Kiyup
I know people that married a friends ex hoochie.

Actually, my good friend was like number 3 in the group of friends and 4 married her.

Guess he didn't care she was passed around like a sack of potatos.

dood, that's just wrong....imagine, he's not even getting sloppy seconds, but sloppy fourths..uggggghhhh

damn, i feel bad for the wife..hahahah, u think they all share stories about her..hahahah

So I take it you plan to marry a virgin?

no, but i would never marry a girl who's dated 3 of my friends....

What difference is it if she slept with three of your friends or three random guys?

B/C at least you dont know who those 3 random guys are....with 3 of your friends, it's just "too close for comfort" u know...

Fair enough. Nothing like finding out that those three random guys were breeding grounds for STDs.

 

[NightRaven]

Women who sleep around in the same group is gross, but thier is an element of familiarity there... Plus, its a little safer than going with strangers... Not to mention girls get off on watching friends fight over them...

 

[OhZyeah]

Originally posted by: VictorLazlo
The rule is: Yes, it is ok for a friend to date your ex...IF he asks your permission first.

However, from personal experience I feel it is better not to, even if the guy says you can.
I had a friend who said I could date his ex. I decided not to, and later I found out that it would have spoiled our friendship if I had done it.

I agree....should at least have decency to ask if he thought it would be bad for the friendship....

 

[maziwanka]

its fine for the friend to date an ex, but it was definately bad for him to be shady about it. i wouldnt be as close with the cat as i was before, cuz if he was this shady then, he'll probably be that shady now.

+ronnie

 

[OhZyeah]

Originally posted by: maziwanka
its fine for the friend to date an ex, but it was definately bad for him to be shady about it. i wouldnt be as close with the cat as i was before, cuz if he was this shady then, he'll probably be that shady now.

+ronnie

yea, shadiness will always be there, no matter how much a person's changed....

the thing is, if he thought i would have a problem with it, then its even more important for him to at least let me know or give me a head's up on what's happening or what he plans to do....

but b/c he was scared to confront me about it, i now look at him differently, and i question where his morals are...my rule has always been "ex's are off limits".....but in this situation, it's the friendship between two friends that suffered b/c of one friend's "stupid-ass" action...

 

[OhZyeah]

Originally posted by: NightRaven
Women who sleep around in the same group is gross, but thier is an element of familiarity there... Plus, its a little safer than going with strangers... Not to mention girls get off on watching friends fight over them...

So, would you date a girl who's dated three of your close friends?