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Is it better not to know about a person's history?

xarmian

Senior member
Do you think it's better to know or not to know about a person's sexual history, and at what point in the relationship do you generally ask (after you've gotten to know eachother, before or after you start officially dating, when you're engaged or after you break up? or never?)..

To make this more interesting, do you hold things back when she asks? (or for the 4 females, do you hold things back when he asks) and, of course, what kinda things.

I would rather know before we start exclusively dating. Of course I don't *really* want to know, I just need to or my curiosity will kill me.

-Dave
 
i think a rough background would be nice to have, around the time when you first start actually exclusively dating...don't need the play by play though...and yeah i held back a few things i wasn't real proud of when my SO asked recently(i'm sure she didnt really want to know anyway)...only long term relationship i've ever been in so i dont have a lot of background really
 
To me, knowledge is power in all matters. I wouldn't want to find out late in the game that my supposed fiancee had a penchant for gangbang flyer parties back in the day... however it also depends on how serious you plan on getting. If it's just physical, that's extraneous info as long as issues of safe sex and hygiene/testing are already discussed. If it's deeper than that, then I would want a full rundown of all that.

And as a rule of thumb, always assume a three-fifths curve on both sides when number of previous partners comes into play. 🙂
 
A certain amount of background always helps. If you feel like you can't tell her about your trips to the farmyard then maybe 1. you souldn't have gone 2. your with the wrong girl.
 
Originally posted by: EmoHawk
A certain amount of background always helps. If you feel like you can't tell her about your trips to the farmyard then maybe 1. you souldn't have gone 2. your with the wrong girl.

:Q

 
I dated a lesbian once, well she choose me. I will not do that again. I have found an experienced woman has an idea what she likes and dislikes. Believe me this is important.
 
If we are talking serious relationship, then you should really know the person enough not to ask.

Asking conveys a personal insecurity and may lead to jealousy.

If its about sexual health then you should be taking precautions anyway. Asking someone about their sexual past won't help, I doubt anyone would own up to being a slut with an STD.
 
Originally posted by: AStar617
To me, knowledge is power in all matters. I wouldn't want to find out late in the game that my supposed fiancee had a penchant for gangbang flyer parties back in the day... however it also depends on how serious you plan on getting. If it's just physical, that's extraneous info as long as issues of safe sex and hygiene/testing are already discussed. If it's deeper than that, then I would want a full rundown of all that.

And as a rule of thumb, always assume a three-fifths curve on both sides when number of previous partners comes into play. 🙂

Nice... mang did the mathematical probability angle.
 
Personally, I'd rather know... just not the gritty details.

My wife's friend has a very sordid sexual history, and most of her close friends know about most, if not all of it. But her husband doesn't know... or maybe doesn't want to know... I'm not sure. But that would just bug the hell out of me to not know what you're sleeping with every night.
 
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