Interesting scenario, what would you do?

DAM

Diamond Member
Jan 10, 2000
6,102
1
76
You have a younger sister that lives with your parents, she is 18 years old, and you both come from a very conservative family. Well, as luck would have it your sister gets pregnant. She informs you about it, and tells you that the boyfriend is taking no responsibility. She is set in getting an abortion, she will not hear of anything else other than an abortion. You know that if your parents found out they would kick her out of the house and completely disown her. However, there is the possibility that your parents will understand, however it is a gamble. Based on YOUR personal beliefs and the circumstances, what would you do? Would you inform your parents? Would you have nothing to do with her?



Things to keep in mind:

1) no this is not happening to me.
2) this is not a prochoice/prolife issue
3) the circumstances are as stated above, the point of this is to see what some of you would do when placed between a rock and a hard place. although, im aware that if this would ever happen to any of us, that the results would be totally different.
4) i am bored and what something interesting to read, and im tired of all the damn nef/kittie post.


dam(only once did i see the world)
 

konichiwa

Lifer
Oct 9, 1999
15,077
2
0
Do it and tell the parents afterwards. She's 18, she can make decisions by herself. It was most likely her fault for getting pregnant by a dead-beat boyfriend, and it will also be her responsibility to solve the situation. Regardless of her parent's philosophies, she's a grown woman and should be able (and must be able) to make this decision by herself. If she wants to have an abortion, then do it.
 

guyver01

Lifer
Sep 25, 2000
22,135
5
61
if it's my family. I follow my sisters wishes. I would hate to do anything to tear the family apart. (and yes, i know if i keep the secret and parents find out it will kill the family anyway)

 

Lily27

Senior member
Dec 24, 2000
510
0
0
I would really leave it up to my sister to decide whether to tell the parents or not.
 

loogie

Banned
Oct 18, 1999
2,478
0
0
If you're gonna f#$%, you should be aware of the risks involved with f*&(ing. Its her conscience, and only she and the father have to live with it.
 

DAM

Diamond Member
Jan 10, 2000
6,102
1
76
So the fact that she is 18 and an "adult" make it all her decision, with no burden on you?







dam(i cant belive that my other thread (which was a double post) has already have more post than this. truly sad :--( )
 

konichiwa

Lifer
Oct 9, 1999
15,077
2
0
You, as her brother? Absolutely no burden on you. Sure you should be there simply because she's in a hard place and she's your sister but at 18 years old it's not your responsibility to tattle tale on your sister. If she feels like the best course of action is to not let the parents know, then that's her choice. Personally I wouldn't get involved other than for the sole purpose of supporting my sister. (I don't even have a sister, what am I talking about? ;))
 

loogie

Banned
Oct 18, 1999
2,478
0
0
Unless you're the father...its not really your business. Sure, you can tell her your opinion on the matter, and you've probably already passed judgement. But I don't think you have any right to tell her what to do. I've seen 15 yr olds act more mature than some kids in college. Age doesn't mean anything.
 

DAM

Diamond Member
Jan 10, 2000
6,102
1
76
Azraele: good point, lets say she is asking you for the money, does it make a difference?


Anyone know how much an abortion cost?





dam(thanks mod for locking the other thread)
 

loogie

Banned
Oct 18, 1999
2,478
0
0
Giving her the money for the abortion would mean that you're supporting her decision...do you? The dude that knocked her up should pay for it. If I was her brother, I would kick his ass for not being a man.
 

DAM

Diamond Member
Jan 10, 2000
6,102
1
76
loogie i am asking you, would you give her your money? would you help out your own sister in a time of need?




As for the guy who got her pregnant, you better believe I would come down on him so fast and so hard that everytime he looked in the mirror he will remember me and what he did.





dam()
 

loogie

Banned
Oct 18, 1999
2,478
0
0
I would. I don't think of it as deciding the fate of the baby, and I acknowledge that there is some burden of guilt on me for giving her the money, but when it comes down to it, I don't want to be the one who makes the decision that will change her life. Giving her the money doesn't make the decision for her, because it still is, her decision. It only gives her the means to make whichever decision she is comfortable with.

I'm only 19, and I haven't actually been in this situation. But, I think that your sister is panicking right now and isn't thinking clearly. Its gonna be a decision that is gonna take some long thought, and I think you should be there for her no matter which decision she makes. She's already been abandoned once.

I tend to think that things happen to you for a reason. You'll come out of this for the better. Your sister will as well.
 

Tiger

Platinum Member
Oct 9, 1999
2,312
0
0
The one thing you don't do is tell the parents. Hearing it from you rather than from her will make things 100% worse.
Also, I wouldn't shell out the cash for the abortion. There comes a time in every life when we start paying for the bad decisions we make. Personal responsibility has to be learned, sometime at a very young age. I'd counsel her to tell the parents and decide what to do about the pregnancy after that. Yes, there will probably be an explosion but after the dust settles the parents and you will probably do what's best for the situation. After the parents are onboard get after the lame ass that won't accept responsibility, and I mean hard (not physically).

 

kami

Lifer
Oct 9, 1999
17,627
5
81
Being Pro-Life, I'd never give my sister money for an abortion. She can damn well live with the consequences of being irresponsible. It'll teach her a lesson. If she doesn't want the baby, give it up for adoption.
 

DAM

Diamond Member
Jan 10, 2000
6,102
1
76
loogie thank god im not in this situation


tiger i agree with telling the parents, but honestly i do not know what i would do if i was in that situation. i know i would support my sister in any of her decisions, but i would try to educate her on the alternatives. I am a strong pro choicer, so I think I would support her with the abortion.






dam(o)
 

eakers

Lifer
Aug 14, 2000
12,169
2
0
i dunno its a tough call.
if she told you, trusting you perhaps it is a cry for help. perhaps she doesnt want to have an abortion maybe she knows that it will make her crazy.
so talk her into telling the parents or say that you will.

yeah i relize this is just a scenario.

*kat. <-- loves you saying


<< i am bored and what something interesting to read, and im tired of all the damn nef/kittie post. >>

 

GL

Diamond Member
Oct 9, 1999
4,547
0
0
1. It's her decision. I would be there for her to bounce her ideas off of and for her to get feedback. But I wouldn't be involved in the process either way.

2. I would swear her to secrecy of my knowing prior to anyone else. What's worse than this situation is the parents finding out and then coming down hard on you for not saying anything to them.

-GL
 

MajesticMoose

Diamond Member
Nov 14, 2000
3,030
0
0
Personally i would tell her to do it and not tell the parents.

Two points:
1)If its a deeply conservative family it wouldn't matter what she did, cause if the parents found out they'd react the same in both situations.

2)I forgot the second point but it was probly something like it's her choice since she's 18.

Moose
 

bikman

Member
Oct 2, 2000
119
0
0
I would not give her the money, and I'd be hard pressed not to tell the parents. she's old enought to do the deed, she's old enough to handle the consequences, good or bad. And I also would not want the blood of my never to be born niece or nephew on my hands.