- Nov 19, 2001
- 27,727
- 16
- 81
God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with, broccoli, cauliflower, spinach, green, yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.
Then Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Kreme Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said "Yes!" and Woman said "and as long as you're at it, add some sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And Satan smiled.
And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat and sugar from the cane and combined them. And Woman went from size 6 to size14
So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side.
And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast. God then said "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them." And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter.
And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof. God then created a light, fluffy white cake and named it "Angel Food", and said it is good, eat this very sparingly." Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food".
God then brought forth running shoes so that His children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering light and gained pounds.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition. And Satan peeled off the beautiful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And Man gained pounds.
God then gave lean meat so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created the ultimate weapon of mass destruction know as fast-food restaurants with 99-cent double cheeseburgers Then said "You want fries with that?" And Man replied, "Yes! And super-size them!" And Satan said, "It is good."
And Man went into cardiac arrest.
And God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery and Satan smiled as he created HMOs.
Then Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Kreme Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said "Yes!" and Woman said "and as long as you're at it, add some sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And Satan smiled.
And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat and sugar from the cane and combined them. And Woman went from size 6 to size14
So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side.
And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast. God then said "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them." And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter.
And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof. God then created a light, fluffy white cake and named it "Angel Food", and said it is good, eat this very sparingly." Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food".
God then brought forth running shoes so that His children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering light and gained pounds.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition. And Satan peeled off the beautiful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And Man gained pounds.
God then gave lean meat so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created the ultimate weapon of mass destruction know as fast-food restaurants with 99-cent double cheeseburgers Then said "You want fries with that?" And Man replied, "Yes! And super-size them!" And Satan said, "It is good."
And Man went into cardiac arrest.
And God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery and Satan smiled as he created HMOs.
