In the Begining...

ThePresence

Elite Member
Nov 19, 2001
27,727
16
81
God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with, broccoli, cauliflower, spinach, green, yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

Then Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Kreme Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said "Yes!" and Woman said "and as long as you're at it, add some sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And Satan smiled.

And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat and sugar from the cane and combined them. And Woman went from size 6 to size14

So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side.

And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast. God then said "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them." And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter.

And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof. God then created a light, fluffy white cake and named it "Angel Food", and said it is good, eat this very sparingly." Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food".

God then brought forth running shoes so that His children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering light and gained pounds.

Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition. And Satan peeled off the beautiful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And Man gained pounds.

God then gave lean meat so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created the ultimate weapon of mass destruction know as fast-food restaurants with 99-cent double cheeseburgers Then said "You want fries with that?" And Man replied, "Yes! And super-size them!" And Satan said, "It is good."

And Man went into cardiac arrest.

And God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery and Satan smiled as he created HMOs.
 

Sluggo

Lifer
Jun 12, 2000
15,488
5
81
And then arrived: http://www.monsterthickburger.com/ from Hardees (Carls Jr)

From their nutritional inforamtion sheet:

Serving Size: 462 Grams

Calories: 1300

Calories from fat: 860

Total fat: 96 Grams

Saturated fat: 40 Grams

Cholesterol: 205 MilliGrams

Total Carborydrates: 41 Grams

Dietary fiber: 3 Grams

Sugars: 11 Grams

Protein: 52 Grams
 

Iron Woode

Elite Member
Super Moderator
Oct 10, 1999
31,304
12,820
136

ThePresence

Elite Member
Nov 19, 2001
27,727
16
81
Originally posted by: Iron Woode
Originally posted by: Sluggo
And then arrived: http://www.monsterthickburger.com/ from Hardees (Carls Jr)

From their nutritional inforamtion sheet:

Serving Size: 462 Grams

Calories: 1300

Calories from fat: 860

Total fat: 96 Grams

Saturated fat: 40 Grams

Cholesterol: 205 MilliGrams

Total Carborydrates: 41 Grams

Dietary fiber: 3 Grams

Sugars: 11 Grams

Protein: 52 Grams
That's nothing.

Behold the king: http://www.snopes.com/photos/c...ls/bigburger.asp#photo

OMFG!
 

bluehorizon

Senior member
Jun 25, 2004
564
0
0
Originally posted by: Iron Woode
Originally posted by: Sluggo
And then arrived: http://www.monsterthickburger.com/ from Hardees (Carls Jr)

From their nutritional inforamtion sheet:

Serving Size: 462 Grams

Calories: 1300

Calories from fat: 860

Total fat: 96 Grams

Saturated fat: 40 Grams

Cholesterol: 205 MilliGrams

Total Carborydrates: 41 Grams

Dietary fiber: 3 Grams

Sugars: 11 Grams

Protein: 52 Grams
That's nothing.

Behold the king: http://www.snopes.com/photos/c...ls/bigburger.asp#photo

I think I can see hooves and an ear in the cow that guy's eating...
 

DaFinn

Diamond Member
Jan 24, 2002
4,725
0
0
Originally posted by: ThePresence
Originally posted by: Iron Woode
Originally posted by: Sluggo
And then arrived: http://www.monsterthickburger.com/ from Hardees (Carls Jr)

From their nutritional inforamtion sheet:

Serving Size: 462 Grams

Calories: 1300

Calories from fat: 860

Total fat: 96 Grams

Saturated fat: 40 Grams

Cholesterol: 205 MilliGrams

Total Carborydrates: 41 Grams

Dietary fiber: 3 Grams

Sugars: 11 Grams

Protein: 52 Grams
That's nothing.

Behold the king: http://www.snopes.com/photos/c...ls/bigburger.asp#photo

OMFG!

COULD NOT HAVE SAID IT BETTER MESELF :Q