I'm ashamed of myself

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Booster

Diamond Member
May 4, 2002
4,380
0
0
Oh God I just realized how much I suck. I suck bigtime as a personality. Just when I became a student, I started to drink regularly on days off. The worst thing is that I always drank alone by myself since there wasn't any company for me. Now, 6 years later, I'm sitting here, finishing my regular weekend bottle of bad whiskey and I feel fear. I send a message to all of those who are younger than 21 y.o. and for whom it's illegal to drink: people, don't do it. You'll regret it a few years later.

I'm thinking about how much damage my liver has received through these weekly consumptions. Oh God. I imagine endless raws of bottles of wine, beer, gin and whiskey. I can praise myself that I never drank vodka, though.

I also started to smoke on occasion when I was about 17. I have given up smoking recently, but the thought of the damage my lungs have received is killing me.

I also have another problem, but can't write about it here due to censorship *censored*.

Well the point of this post is for all of you who haven't started to kill yourself yet don't do it man! You don't know what bad things will happen to you! Now I know the value of being a good and honest Christian and the importance of faith in God. I know that I became such a nuisance through the lack of faith. God pls help me never drink or smoke again. Amen.
 
Judgement

Judgement

Diamond Member
Feb 8, 2001
3,815
0
0
Originally posted by: Que-TiP
vodka would be better for you than beer, whiskey, or gin.
Click to expand...

Sorry, I don' have anything to contribute to the the thread's topic, but I was wondering why vodka is not as harmful, I've never heard that before.
 
Q

Que-TiP

Senior member
Dec 8, 1999
685
0
0
a well distilled 80 proof vodka will cause less liver damage than the rest of the drinks. its just an inherant quality of vodka.
 
Q

Que-TiP

Senior member
Dec 8, 1999
685
0
0
Originally posted by: Booster
Originally posted by: Que-TiP
vodka would be better for you than beer, whiskey, or gin.
Click to expand...

Only alcoholics drink it so I guess not.
Click to expand...

i drink vodka, and i'm nowhere near an alcoholic. I just prefer it over other drinks. My favorite is some belvedere over ice.
 
rudeguy

rudeguy

Lifer
Dec 27, 2001
47,351
14
61
really...get out...find something to do besides drink and feel sorry for yourself...the world isnt that bad of a place man
 
J

Jzero

Lifer
Oct 10, 1999
18,834
1
0
Originally posted by: Booster
Originally posted by: Que-TiP
vodka would be better for you than beer, whiskey, or gin.
Click to expand...

Only alcoholics drink it so I guess not.
Click to expand...

LMAO
I cringe at the thought hearing your beliefs on tequila.
 
B

brxndxn

Diamond Member
Apr 3, 2001
8,475
0
76
For me, it's exactly the contrary.

In high school, mostly senior year, I did all of my 'experimentation'. I drank every weekend and had my fair share of hangover school days. Then, when I came to college, I found all these nerds who had never touched alcohol in their lives. Now, it is those nerds that drink too much, get DUIs, and generally make fools of themselves because they had no experience with alcohol before. They just automatically assume their tolerance is that of someone who's been drinking 3-4 years prior.

For me, I drink less now than I did in high school. I find less of a desire to get drunk - Instead, I really just like to try new beers. I don't even drink liquour except for a Gin n Tonic once in a while.

Seriously, if you are drinking a bottle of whiskey in a night, you have to quit. You need to know when you have a problem - and I would say you definitely have a problem. Join AA, find God, or do whatever you can to take your life off the bottle.
 
wnied

wnied

Diamond Member
Oct 10, 1999
4,206
0
76
God pls help me never drink or smoke again. Amen.

God Helps those who help themselves...

One word for you: Rehab.

~wnied~
 
A

Aceshigh

Platinum Member
Aug 22, 2002
2,529
1
0
I wouldn't worry about lung damage from smoking. It sounds like you only smoked for around 6 years. Once you quit your lungs start to repair themselves. In a year or so you will have the lungs of a non-smoker. Now if you had smoked for 20 years or so it might be a different story.
 
kranky

kranky

Elite Member
Oct 9, 1999
21,019
156
106
Booster, it's certainly not too late for you to change, if you want to. Don't let regrets drag you down. We have all done things that we look back on and wish we hadn't, but there's no point to kicking yourself over your past. I did some terrible things that I wish I hadn't,
but I won't keep beating myself up about it. I changed the type of person I was, and I do not carry that shame around any more. I tell myself that's not the person I am now, and I left that stuff behind me. All I can do is to do the best I can right now.

Sometimes people don't change because they are afraid of the future even though they hate their present. People who drink are often afraid they might not be able to cope if they quit.

If you don't like what you are, change it. You can do it. It might be scary, but the best advise I ever heard on this topic was "Do it scared." You might be apprehensive about changing, but that doesn't mean you should wait until you are totally comfortable because that might never happen. If you have to do it, do it even if you are scared. Those are the things that make you stronger. If you need a support group like AA, find one. That's helped thousands of people.

You asked God to help you, and if you are sincere, He will. Do what you have to do, let God give you strength, and you will achieve it.
 
zCypher

zCypher

Diamond Member
Aug 18, 2002
6,115
171
116
Don't cigarrettes have something like 4000 chemicals released when you light them, 50 of which are cancer-causing?

 
A

AlienCraft

Lifer
Nov 23, 2002
10,539
0
0
Originally posted by: Que-TiP
a well distilled 80 proof vodka will cause less liver damage than the rest of the drinks. its just an inherant quality of vodka.
Click to expand...

From the halls of science.......
rolleye.gif


RIIIIGGht!
 
A

AlienCraft

Lifer
Nov 23, 2002
10,539
0
0
Originally posted by: Booster
Oh God I just realized how much I suck. I suck bigtime as a personality. Just when I became a student, I started to drink regularly on days off. The worst thing is that I always drank alone by myself since there wasn't any company for me. Now, 6 years later, I'm sitting here, finishing my regular weekend bottle of bad whiskey and I feel fear. I send a message to all of those who are younger than 21 y.o. and for whom it's illegal to drink: people, don't do it. You'll regret it a few years later.

I'm thinking about how much damage my liver has received through these weekly consumptions. Oh God. I imagine endless raws of bottles of wine, beer, gin and whiskey. I can praise myself that I never drank vodka, though.

I also started to smoke on occasion when I was about 17. I have given up smoking recently, but the thought of the damage my lungs have received is killing me.

I also have another problem, but can't write about it here due to censorship *censored*.

Well the point of this post is for all of you who haven't started to kill yourself yet don't do it man! You don't know what bad things will happen to you! Now I know the value of being a good and honest Christian and the importance of faith in God. I know that I became such a nuisance through the lack of faith. God pls help me never drink or smoke again. Amen.
Click to expand...
Good Morning, welcome to Real LIfe..... It's good to have you back with us.....
When you're finally ready to quit, you can.
Until then, you will swing back and forth between bouts of recrimination/ remorse and relapse.
That is normal.
Go get some help. Asking people for help is normal, too.
Therapy, The Landmark Forums,AA / NA may provide some assistance.
You CAN do it.
Good luck.

And it really is just as easy as taking it "one day at a time".

 
B

Booster

Diamond Member
May 4, 2002
4,380
0
0
Thanks for all the good replies... Really, no kidding. I liked them and find them helpful. However.... Have you felt that nothing really matters? That's what I feel now. No, I don't need to drink anymore. That's how I gave up smoking. I had been going through some big pain and I just gave it up. Bonkers! I don't smoke any more. There was no reason to start smoking, no reason to quit. It just happened.

Oh my... I feel guilty for polluting this place with my crap. And it's pointless anyways. SO if you don't like it - I beg your pardon. I don't like it too and I don't like myself. I'd wish instant death right now hadn't I known I'm already dead - forever.
 
A

AlienCraft

Lifer
Nov 23, 2002
10,539
0
0
Originally posted by: Booster
Thanks for all the good replies... Really, no kidding. I liked them and find them helpful. However.... Have you felt that nothing really matters? That's what I feel now. No, I don't need to drink anymore. That's how I gave up smoking. I had been going through some big pain and I just gave it up. Bonkers! I don't smoke any more. There was no reason to start smoking, no reason to quit. It just happened.

Oh my... I feel guilty for polluting this place with my crap. And it's pointless anyways. SO if you don't like it - I beg your pardon. I don't like it too and I don't like myself. I'd wish instant death right now hadn't I known I'm already dead - forever.
Click to expand...
The only thing harsh I'm going to say is "Knock off the suicide/ dying crap!" :disgust:
What matters now is re-building the things in life that really mean something.... The things that remind us of how interconnected we all are, you know the simple, beautiful things that we forget as we rush through our rat trap routine of daily existance.
Things will get better, they have a way of doing that after the interferences go away.
Get moving, if only to walk around the block.
 
E

element

Diamond Member
Oct 9, 1999
4,635
0
0
Originally posted by: RettaGuy
Originally posted by: Booster
Originally posted by: Que-TiP
vodka would be better for you than beer, whiskey, or gin.
Click to expand...

Only alcoholics drink it so I guess not.
Click to expand...

you drink alone, a bottle a night....and you arent an alcoholic:confused:
Click to expand...

No you see, he doesn't drink vodka, so he's not an alcoholic. Even if he drinks a gallon of beer, whiskey or wine before breakfast everyday, he's not an alcoholic. The daffynition of alcoholic is: "One who drinks vodka"
rolleye.gif


Ok on a more serious note, good luck to you and it takes guts to confront your vice, hope you quit the stuff before it gets worse.
 
Scarpozzi

Scarpozzi

Lifer
Jun 13, 2000
26,392
1,780
126
Originally posted by: Booster
Seriously, if you are drinking a bottle of whiskey in a night
Click to expand...

But it's a small bottle. And I know I have to quit.
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Dude....why do you buy the small bottles if you consume one a week? I'd go ahead and buy it by the handle (1.75L) to save cash. Buy in volume.

As far as your point on drinking. Find something to do that will help you meet someone else that's looking for stuff to do on weekends. Then you won't even think about drinking.
 
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