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If you don't do this, you're gross

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Why do you get the eraser shit when you wash like a normal person? And why does the list include three things that are like a mile down in priority from using a bidet?
 
Is it abnormal to use a loofa/shower pouf?
Shrug, probably not. In my household it’s 50:50 and that’s all the data I have. My wife uses one and I don’t. She’s always jealous of my zero effort good skin 🙂

They seem like breeding grounds for bacteria and bodily buildup to me.
 
I don't know about the rest of y'all but I shit exactly once a day, everyday, in the morning. I then wipe with normal toilet paper, and then take a shower wherein I wash my asshole. For what is a shower but not a bidet for the whole body.

Also trimming publes as the added side effect of making your dong look bigger. My pubes run up the shaft, so a good trim down looks like I've earned back some length.
 
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