I think this applies perfectly to you. NO! You don't get the cliff's notes. If you can't read the whole thing, you need to stop posting.
Welcome to the Internet.
No one here likes you.
We're going to offend, insult, abuse, and belittle the living hell out of you. And when you rail against us with "FvCK YOU YOU GEEK WIMP SKATER GOTH LOSER PUNK BITCH!1!!", we smile to ourselves. We laugh at you because you don't get it. Then we turn up the heat, hoping to draw more entertainment from your irrational fuming.
We will judge you, and we will find you unworthy. It is a trial by fire, and we won't even think about turning down the flames until you finally understand.
Some of you are smart enough to realize that, when you go online, it's like entering a foreign country ... and you know better than to ignorantly fvck with the locals. You take the time to listen and think before speaking. You learn, and by learning are gladly welcomed.
For some of you, it takes a while, then one day it all dawns on you - you get it, and are welcomed into the fold.
Some of you give up, and we breathe a sigh of relief - we didn't want you here anyway. And some of you just never get it. The offensively clueless have a special place in our hearts - as objects of ridicule. We don't like you, but we do love you.
You will get mad. You will tell us to go to hell, and call us "nerds" and "geeks". Don't bother ... we already know exactly what we are. And, much like the way hardcore rap has co-opted the word "", turning an insult around on itself to become a semiserious badge of honor, so have we done.
"How dare you! I used to beat the crap out of punks like you in high school/college!" You may have owned the playing field because you were an athlete. You may have owned the student council because you were more popular. You may have owned the hallways and sidewalks because you were big and intimidating. Well, welcome to our world.
Things like athleticism, popularity, and physical prowess mean nothing here. We place no value on them ... or what car you drive, the size of your bank account, what you do for a living or where you went to school.
Allow us to introduce you to the concept of a "meritocracy" - the closest thing to a form of self-government we have. In The United Meritocratic nation-states of the Internet, those who can do, rule. Those who wish to rule, learn. Everyone else watches from the stands.
You may posses everything in the off-line world. We don't care. You come to the Internet penniless, lacking the only thing of real value here: knowledge.
"Who cares? The Internet isn't real anyway!" This attitude is universally unacceptable. The Internet is real. Real people live behind those handles and screen names. Real machines allow it to exist. It's real enough to change government policy, real enough to feed the world's hungry, and even, for some of us, real enough to earn us a paycheck. Using your own definition, how "real" is your job? Your stock portfolio? Your political party? What is the meaning of "real", anyway?
Do I sound arrogant? Sure ... to you. Because you probably don't get it yet.
If you insist on staying, then, at the very least, follow this advice:
1) No one, ESPECIALLY YOU, will make any law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.
2) Use your brain before ever putting fingers to keys.
3) Do you want a picture of you getting anally raped by Bill Clinton while you're performing oral sex on a cow saved to hundreds of thousands of people's hard drives? No? Then don't put your picture on the Internet. We can, will, and probably already HAVE altered it in awful ways. Expect it to show up on an equally offensive website.
4) Realize that you are never, EVER going to get that, or any other, offensive web page taken down. Those of us who run those sites LIVE to piss off people like you. Those of us who don't run those sites sometimes visit them just to read the hatemail from fools like you.
5) Oh, you say you're going to a lawyer? Be prepared for us to giggle with girlish delight, and for your lawyer to laugh in your face after he explains current copyright and parody law.
6) The Web is not the Internet. Stop referring to it that way.
7) We have already received the e-mail you are about to forward to us. Shut up.
8) Don't reply to spam. You are not going to be "unsubscribed".
9) Don't ever use the term "cyberspace" (only William Gibson gets to say that, and even he hasn't really used it for two or three books now). Likewise, you prove yourself a marketing-hype victim if you ever use the term "surfing".
10) With one or two notable exceptions, chat rooms will not get you laid.
11) It's a hoax, not a virus warning.
12) The internet is made up of thousands of computers, all connected but owned by different people. Learn how to use *your* computer before attempting to connect it to someone else's.
13) The first person who offers to help you is really just trying to fvck with you for entertainment. So is the second. And the third. And me.
14) Never insult someone who's been active in any group longer than you have. You may as well paint a damn target on your back.
15) Never get comfortable and arrogant behind your supposed mask of anonymity. Don't be surprised when your name, address, and home phone number get thrown back in your smug face. Hell, some of us will snail-mail you a printed satellite photograph of your house to drive the point home. Realize that you are powerless if this happens ... it's all public information, and information is our stock and trade.
16) No one thinks you are as cool as you think you are.
17) You aren't going to win any argument that you start.
18) If you're on AOL, don't worry about anything I've said here. You're already a laughing stock, and there's no hope for you.
19) If you can't take a joke, immediately sell your computer to someone who can. RIGHT NOW.
Pissed off? It's the TRUTH, not these words, that hurts your feelings. Don't ever even pretend like I've gone & hurt them.
We don't like you. We don't want you here. We never will. Save us all the trouble and go away.
Welcome to the Internet.
No one here likes you.
We're going to offend, insult, abuse, and belittle the living hell out of you. And when you rail against us with "FvCK YOU YOU GEEK WIMP SKATER GOTH LOSER PUNK BITCH!1!!", we smile to ourselves. We laugh at you because you don't get it. Then we turn up the heat, hoping to draw more entertainment from your irrational fuming.
We will judge you, and we will find you unworthy. It is a trial by fire, and we won't even think about turning down the flames until you finally understand.
Some of you are smart enough to realize that, when you go online, it's like entering a foreign country ... and you know better than to ignorantly fvck with the locals. You take the time to listen and think before speaking. You learn, and by learning are gladly welcomed.
For some of you, it takes a while, then one day it all dawns on you - you get it, and are welcomed into the fold.
Some of you give up, and we breathe a sigh of relief - we didn't want you here anyway. And some of you just never get it. The offensively clueless have a special place in our hearts - as objects of ridicule. We don't like you, but we do love you.
You will get mad. You will tell us to go to hell, and call us "nerds" and "geeks". Don't bother ... we already know exactly what we are. And, much like the way hardcore rap has co-opted the word "", turning an insult around on itself to become a semiserious badge of honor, so have we done.
"How dare you! I used to beat the crap out of punks like you in high school/college!" You may have owned the playing field because you were an athlete. You may have owned the student council because you were more popular. You may have owned the hallways and sidewalks because you were big and intimidating. Well, welcome to our world.
Things like athleticism, popularity, and physical prowess mean nothing here. We place no value on them ... or what car you drive, the size of your bank account, what you do for a living or where you went to school.
Allow us to introduce you to the concept of a "meritocracy" - the closest thing to a form of self-government we have. In The United Meritocratic nation-states of the Internet, those who can do, rule. Those who wish to rule, learn. Everyone else watches from the stands.
You may posses everything in the off-line world. We don't care. You come to the Internet penniless, lacking the only thing of real value here: knowledge.
"Who cares? The Internet isn't real anyway!" This attitude is universally unacceptable. The Internet is real. Real people live behind those handles and screen names. Real machines allow it to exist. It's real enough to change government policy, real enough to feed the world's hungry, and even, for some of us, real enough to earn us a paycheck. Using your own definition, how "real" is your job? Your stock portfolio? Your political party? What is the meaning of "real", anyway?
Do I sound arrogant? Sure ... to you. Because you probably don't get it yet.
If you insist on staying, then, at the very least, follow this advice:
1) No one, ESPECIALLY YOU, will make any law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.
2) Use your brain before ever putting fingers to keys.
3) Do you want a picture of you getting anally raped by Bill Clinton while you're performing oral sex on a cow saved to hundreds of thousands of people's hard drives? No? Then don't put your picture on the Internet. We can, will, and probably already HAVE altered it in awful ways. Expect it to show up on an equally offensive website.
4) Realize that you are never, EVER going to get that, or any other, offensive web page taken down. Those of us who run those sites LIVE to piss off people like you. Those of us who don't run those sites sometimes visit them just to read the hatemail from fools like you.
5) Oh, you say you're going to a lawyer? Be prepared for us to giggle with girlish delight, and for your lawyer to laugh in your face after he explains current copyright and parody law.
6) The Web is not the Internet. Stop referring to it that way.
7) We have already received the e-mail you are about to forward to us. Shut up.
8) Don't reply to spam. You are not going to be "unsubscribed".
9) Don't ever use the term "cyberspace" (only William Gibson gets to say that, and even he hasn't really used it for two or three books now). Likewise, you prove yourself a marketing-hype victim if you ever use the term "surfing".
10) With one or two notable exceptions, chat rooms will not get you laid.
11) It's a hoax, not a virus warning.
12) The internet is made up of thousands of computers, all connected but owned by different people. Learn how to use *your* computer before attempting to connect it to someone else's.
13) The first person who offers to help you is really just trying to fvck with you for entertainment. So is the second. And the third. And me.
14) Never insult someone who's been active in any group longer than you have. You may as well paint a damn target on your back.
15) Never get comfortable and arrogant behind your supposed mask of anonymity. Don't be surprised when your name, address, and home phone number get thrown back in your smug face. Hell, some of us will snail-mail you a printed satellite photograph of your house to drive the point home. Realize that you are powerless if this happens ... it's all public information, and information is our stock and trade.
16) No one thinks you are as cool as you think you are.
17) You aren't going to win any argument that you start.
18) If you're on AOL, don't worry about anything I've said here. You're already a laughing stock, and there's no hope for you.
19) If you can't take a joke, immediately sell your computer to someone who can. RIGHT NOW.
Pissed off? It's the TRUTH, not these words, that hurts your feelings. Don't ever even pretend like I've gone & hurt them.
We don't like you. We don't want you here. We never will. Save us all the trouble and go away.
I want to beat you with a stick. a sharp one... with a nail sticking out the end of it... and lit on fire...
there are males here too, who have had experience, who can talk about this stuff.
you're right, I should go find a woman discussions board. If there was ever one around that is as active as this board.
Experience is a good teacher, but it cant teach you everything. And it has a high cost, and is only limited to your life,
WHen you go on a message board you can learn about the lives of 40 others, and get a much broader basis of understanding on some issues.
I take my effort to post information and then I go back and do a little digging on why everyone else is ripping on you. Turns out you are infamous for posting threads repeatedly without listening. It's like you waste people's time for nothing. I am one of the nicer people here, actually one of the few patient ones. However I do not like my time being wasted. Your last paragraph, especially indicates this to be the case:
The big deal is that you post in such need of answers and then do nothing about it? WTF kind of messed up sh1t is that?
I think you guys are doggin on skywalker a bit much. Everyone deals with things differently. With divorce stats where they are, god forbid he try to figure out how to gain an advantage in certain areas. You don't even have to read his threads. In fact, you basically all just squat and take a dump in all of his threads. Lighten up.
Well sorry then, I guess if these types of posts here are not wanted by anyone, then I wont post them here on this forum.
Didn't know there was such a unanimous distaste here for my threads. I figured that there had to be SOME folk like me out there who was getting something out of them.
1. This isn't an argument.
2. You are a coward. Your inane quest to information whore everyone of their experiences so you won't fail proves how scared you are with dealing uncomfortability.
3. Tip-toeing through life will leave you weak and constantly being stepped on. People try to convey this message to you, yet you still approach things too cautiously.
4. You are wasting your youth. Everyday you are like this, you are wasting another day to still be a young adult. Pretty soon you're gonna be 35, with some cubicle job (low confidence workers never get promoted), no girlfriend, probably not even a kiss and you're gonna wonder what happened to your life.
2. You are a coward. Your inane quest to information whore everyone of their experiences so you won't fail proves how scared you are with dealing uncomfortability.
3. Tip-toeing through life will leave you weak and constantly being stepped on. People try to convey this message to you, yet you still approach things too cautiously.
4. You are wasting your youth. Everyday you are like this, you are wasting another day to still be a young adult. Pretty soon you're gonna be 35, with some cubicle job (low confidence workers never get promoted), no girlfriend, probably not even a kiss and you're gonna wonder what happened to your life.
Oh, but it does! It necessitates the action for him to post YAGT! It's like he's Billy Crystal in Groundhog Day.
TuxDave
Lifer
- Oct 8, 2002
- 10,571
- 3
- 71
I'm still flipping through most of his threads so perhaps I missed something important. But this is honestly the first time that I've seen a guy have so many girl questions without having a girl/a girl in mind/a girl in question. If he would at least get to the point where there is a girl or at least a 'real situation' and THEN asked a question on how to proceed, I would be much happier to help.
Your post are pathetic. You are not going to learn anything from your the questions. I think you should be banned from posting about girls until you get some experience under your belt. There is no sure way to get women because all women want different things. Yes there are a few traits that they look for and insecurity is not one of them. I would personally pay to get you an escort to help you out but I'm sure you would fail to get some even then. Instead you would waste the time asking stupid questions instead of living and learning. You said you would go to a female discussion board. Trust me they would be much harsher than these guys after reading a few of your pathetic post.
I make these posts because I am CURIOUS AS ALL CAN BE to know the answers!
half of the time I dont want to do anything about anything, I just want to KNOW MORE!!
I have a mind that clings to answers and knowledge like a magnet to a block of iron, I dont know why, but it is just the way I am. I am intensly curious to know more, and to know more immediately. And I don't know why, because half of the time I wont even use the knowledge. (or at least not right away)
An observation:
Infamy is a close second to fame.
Its hard to stand out here in ATOT these days, with an endless flood of posts, threads, and new members. Therefore n00bs are faced with a choice:
a) Spend up to a year posting intellegent, meaningful, and funny things until people gradually start recognizing you.
b) Annoy everyone as much as possible and get recognized immediately.
Sure 'B' means no one likes you, but hey - at least they know your name, right?
Infamy is a close second to fame.
Its hard to stand out here in ATOT these days, with an endless flood of posts, threads, and new members. Therefore n00bs are faced with a choice:
a) Spend up to a year posting intellegent, meaningful, and funny things until people gradually start recognizing you.
b) Annoy everyone as much as possible and get recognized immediately.
Sure 'B' means no one likes you, but hey - at least they know your name, right?
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