Ok, people must think that I only work with idiots in my office. Nothing can be further from the truth. I;m here to give an anti-rant on someone in the office that makes my day go by alot faster.
She looks like your typical grandmother. Graying hair, Mid-60's, 5' 0" tall, soft spoken, and always a full candy jar on her desk. Look beyond that and you'll see one remakable person. I mean she still smokes 2 packs of Salems a day, keeps a little bottle of vodka under her desk, drives a huge ass pickup truck, and will not hesitate to speak her mind. If a VP does something stupid, she will not hold back any words when she tells them they are a moron.
It was hilarious last week, I see her drag one of the managers (a real douche bag) by the arm toward me. She then said, "TELL HIM!!!" The guy hesistated and she said, "Be man and speak up."
In a weak voice the guy read off a Post It Note and said, "We need to order a HP 2100 on my cost center."
She then butted in and said, "No you screwed up. We need a HP 2100DN."
For those that don't know, the 2100 is the standard parallel model while the DN include a 10BaseT JetDirect Print Server and extra 250 sheet paper tray. How did she know to order the 2100TN? This woman has been working on computers since the IBM mainframe days. She is still remembers the first transistor and early ICs. Don't argue computers with her because she keep up and maybe even sock you with a curve ball. There are people that can barely hook up an printer and she knows the entire HP lineup inside out. She has been in the company so long that she can push through any request because she knows all the senior managers in the office. We once needed a new copier but just could not get approval from HQ. She got on the phone and within 5 minutes, we got a twice as much $$$ than we needed. Amazing.
The printer arrived this morning but I never got a chance to pick it up. Next thing I know she is infront of my door with the printer tossed over her shoulder. Another little tidbit, she was born and raised in the wilderness of Finland. Not just some wussy forest but the real frozen wilderness where they trapped reindeer for meat and chopped their own firewood. This woman is built like a tank.
Ok, a 30lb printer isn't much but I nearly died laughing during our office move. She was one of the coordinators and there was no arguing with her. When she can and told you to vacate your cube, you did it ASAP. Some guy tried be lazy but ended up the laughingstock of the office. I arrived at the guy's cube with her and she basically said, "Your turn to move out."
The wus claimed that he was waiting for the office movers since his stuff was too heavy. Sure enough he has a 17" monitor box full of thick reports that looked like it weighed 100lbs. She just told him, "Stop being a girl" and casually tossed the box over her shoulder and proceeded to walk away like she was carrying a cup of coffee. Everyone was in awe and the silence was finally broken when everyone burst out in simultanious laughter.
Yup, I work with some fine people that more than make of for the idiots.
Windogg
She looks like your typical grandmother. Graying hair, Mid-60's, 5' 0" tall, soft spoken, and always a full candy jar on her desk. Look beyond that and you'll see one remakable person. I mean she still smokes 2 packs of Salems a day, keeps a little bottle of vodka under her desk, drives a huge ass pickup truck, and will not hesitate to speak her mind. If a VP does something stupid, she will not hold back any words when she tells them they are a moron.
It was hilarious last week, I see her drag one of the managers (a real douche bag) by the arm toward me. She then said, "TELL HIM!!!" The guy hesistated and she said, "Be man and speak up."
In a weak voice the guy read off a Post It Note and said, "We need to order a HP 2100 on my cost center."
She then butted in and said, "No you screwed up. We need a HP 2100DN."
For those that don't know, the 2100 is the standard parallel model while the DN include a 10BaseT JetDirect Print Server and extra 250 sheet paper tray. How did she know to order the 2100TN? This woman has been working on computers since the IBM mainframe days. She is still remembers the first transistor and early ICs. Don't argue computers with her because she keep up and maybe even sock you with a curve ball. There are people that can barely hook up an printer and she knows the entire HP lineup inside out. She has been in the company so long that she can push through any request because she knows all the senior managers in the office. We once needed a new copier but just could not get approval from HQ. She got on the phone and within 5 minutes, we got a twice as much $$$ than we needed. Amazing.
The printer arrived this morning but I never got a chance to pick it up. Next thing I know she is infront of my door with the printer tossed over her shoulder. Another little tidbit, she was born and raised in the wilderness of Finland. Not just some wussy forest but the real frozen wilderness where they trapped reindeer for meat and chopped their own firewood. This woman is built like a tank.
Ok, a 30lb printer isn't much but I nearly died laughing during our office move. She was one of the coordinators and there was no arguing with her. When she can and told you to vacate your cube, you did it ASAP. Some guy tried be lazy but ended up the laughingstock of the office. I arrived at the guy's cube with her and she basically said, "Your turn to move out."
The wus claimed that he was waiting for the office movers since his stuff was too heavy. Sure enough he has a 17" monitor box full of thick reports that looked like it weighed 100lbs. She just told him, "Stop being a girl" and casually tossed the box over her shoulder and proceeded to walk away like she was carrying a cup of coffee. Everyone was in awe and the silence was finally broken when everyone burst out in simultanious laughter.
Yup, I work with some fine people that more than make of for the idiots.
Windogg
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