I need you guys to make the call

[NuclearNed]

The wife is really bad about leaving the toilet paper roll empty on the holder, so I gave her the "cease and desist." Now a question of semantics has come up concerning the word "empty." I believe that if just paper fragments or that last glued-on square are still on the roll, then the roll is empty (i.e. there has to be usable paper). She believes empty means the roll is completely free of all shreds (i.e. there has to be no paper). The result is that she never puts a new roll on because to her it's never empty.

You guys make the call.

 

[masterxfob]

she's joking right?

 

[amdhunter]

It's empty when the roll is completely bare.

 

[Rastus]

You cannot win. Surrender now.

 

[Howard]

Ask her if she'll let you wipe her ass with the cardboard form/roll.

EDIT: She is allowed to have up to, but not fully, one square of paper left on the roll.

 

[queenrobot]

You win.

 

[Jeff7]

Geez, when I shared an apartment, I'd sometimes put a new roll on BEFORE the old one ran out, and put the nearly-spent roll on the tank.

The roll is empty when you think, "Wow, there's not nearly enough there to be of any use to anyone short of a dying hornet emptying its bladder."



Edit: Yay, I timewarped 3 posts.

 

[OCGuy]

Tell her you'll hoist yourself up on the sink and wash your ass in there.

 

[nakedfrog]

By her logic, most things are never empty.

 

[1sikbITCH]

This is a case where she is trying to use the letter of the law to defeat the spirit of the law. This is akin to leaving 1 cube in the cube tray so you don't have to be the one to fill it up. If she worked at Felcher and Sons, Triple T would be clothes-lining her as she exited the stall.

That's my take anyhow.

 

[OCGuy]

Is it completely empty, or is it 99.999....% empty?

 

[olds]

She's a woman. The empty is between her ears.

 

[Buttzilla]

Originally posted by: oldsmoboat
She's a woman. The empty is between her ears.

nice

 

[artikk]

Originally posted by: oldsmoboat
She's a woman. The empty is between her ears.

 

[shiner]

She controls access to the pussy.

You lose.

Every time.

No matter what.

You lose

 

[DAGTA]

Do you really think she doesn't know it's finished? The semantics game is so that you realize she is always in charge and will always get her way. Now go put a new roll on the dispenser.

 

[JS80]

As my wife's twin sister succinctly put it in her speech at our wedding, "HAPPY WIFE, HAPPY LIFE."

 

[zerocool84]

Get a divorce. You should have found this out before you got married. No way you can be married to a woman who doesn't share the same tp values as you do.

 

[artikk]

Originally posted by: JS80
As my wife's twin sister succinctly put it in her speech at our wedding, "HAPPY WIFE, HAPPY LIFE."

this is why you don't get married, just cohabitate

 

[CKent]

Next time you're feeling amorous, give her surprise buttsecks. That way you'll have something worth arguing about to argue about.

 

[funkymatt]

keep a secret roll somewhere and leave the "not empty" roll on there and see how long that lasts with her. she'll be begging for TP pretty quick if she needs it.

 

[Perknose]

If you have to put dood on the tube, then the previous boob was rude.

 

[Savij]

Originally posted by: funkymatt
keep a secret roll somewhere and leave the "not empty" roll on there and see how long that lasts with her. she'll be begging for TP pretty quick if she needs it.

 

[Amused]

She sounds like a political speech writer.

 

[pontifex]

does she use those tiny fragments for wiping? if, not what does she do with them?